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Author Topic: Attitude Is Everything...  (Read 2517 times)

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Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Attitude Is Everything...
« on: November 15, 2006, 05:13:26 PM »
Hello Everyone is is me again. A friend of mine caught the "positive energy" and he has sent this out to his friends. It is just what I was talking about. I wanted to share this with you all as well.

If you think "positive" you will become "positive"...

If you think "negative" you will become "negative"...

It is all about CHOICE. It is up to you to CHOOSE from within you. It is your decision.


READ THIS LET IT REALLY SINK IN - THEN CHOOSE

John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"

He was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, "I don't get it!

You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?"

He replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood.

"I choose to be in a good mood."

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it.


Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.

"Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."

I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw him about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins...Wanna see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked.

He continued, "..the paramedics were great.

They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action."

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said John. " She asked if I was allergic to anything. 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'."

Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."

He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude... I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.


"Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34.

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

You have two choices now:

1. You can ignore this and go on about your daily life.

2. Share it with the people you care about.

You know the choice I made and there is a REASON you read this entire message.

Eldon

Make the BEST of each and every Day!

Offline GSOgymrat

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,052
  • HIV+ since 1993. INTJ
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2006, 12:21:42 AM »
Not trying to be an ass (like I have to try) but this post made me think of one of my all-time favorite websites:

http://www.despair.com/viewall.html

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2006, 06:08:01 PM »
Hey GSOgymrat,

First of all, “Life is under no obligation to give us what we expect.”

In this life there are successes and there are failures. The old clichι goes: “What you put into this life is what you get out of this life”. This statement is very realistic and it is true. For it is solely up to the individual through their “choices” or “attitude” as to how the situation may turn out. Of course, if you are dealing with an unknown element or adversary, it may lead to failure because the individual did not have an awareness of it.

When faced with failure, generally there is a reason for its occurrence. It is up to the individual to step back and review that of which occurred and understand “why” the failure took place. When the individual has a “realization” as to “why” the occurrence turned out the way it did, then the individual can take that “lesson” learned from their “experience” and “apply” it to their next step towards success.

“If your expectation is to fail, then you will fail”

“If your expectation is to achieve, then you will achieve”

Expectations and “shoulds” often go beyond yourself to everything and everyone around you.

It is true that “high” expectations have the potential to set you up for disappointment.

Of course, you do need to set goals and try to achieve them.

But too often, people who suffer from chronic anxiety and depressive episodes have “unrealistic” expectations attached to their goals. Consequently, when and if they try to achieve their goals, the results do not live up to their expectations and they are disappointed. Often, they feel so overwhelmed by their expectations of that goal that they never try to achieve it for “fear” of failure, or “fear” of self-hate.

“If you can learn to lower your expectations to a more “realistic” level, even partial achievement can be viewed as an achievement.”

Maybe you didn’t get the job, but you did feel you did well on the interview. Next time, you will get the job. Maybe you didn’t do all of your grocery shopping your first time out by yourself, but you did make it to the store. That is an achievement. Next time, you can take a list of the things that you do need and you can stay longer to get them.

Things that are worth more usually take more time in coming. They also take more effort. When you “learn” to lower your “expectations”, you will also “learn” patience.

Millions of people who suffer from anxiety disorder enjoy immediate gratification. The main problem with immediate gratification is that it is not long-lasting. You often don’t feel you deserve it. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you feel as if you really didn’t work hard enough for it. Either way, you are headed for disappointment.

"By lowering your “expectations”, the good things that happen are always recognized, while the bad things are “accepted” as an inevitable part of life."

The bottom line is that you simply “learn” from your failures and you move on. Unfortunately, there are many who “choose” to waddle in their disappointments and/or failures instead of “accepting” their failures, “understanding” their failures then moving on in this life. From every single experience in this life, there is something within that experience for us to “learn” , “accept”, and “understand” as it will make us even stronger for the next time around.

“If you seek “negative” from within, then you will find “negative

“If you seek “positive” from within, then you will find “positive”.

I believe I have been clear as to the “negatives”. If there is something that you do not “understand” then by all means, re-read what has been written and you may catch something that you missed the first time.

In fact, Moffie65 had posted a topic on “expectations” just about (4) four months ago. You can refer to this link for your reading: http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=2647.0
 

Make the BEST of each and every Day! It is up to YOU to make it that way!


« Last Edit: November 16, 2006, 06:23:45 PM by Eldon »

Offline dad1216

  • Member
  • Posts: 135
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #3 on: November 16, 2006, 06:49:14 PM »
Not trying to be an ass (like I have to try) but this post made me think of one of my all-time favorite websites:

http://www.despair.com/viewall.html


....LMAO....loved that website......I wish I had those posters back when I was at work to offset those "cheesy" ones the company always bought.......sure would shut up those that think they can enlighten us all....

Dad

« Last Edit: November 16, 2006, 06:54:28 PM by dad1216 »
23 years HIV+ (Oct 88)
11 years AIDS (March 00)

CD4=83  VL=47,000  (May 2011)
CD4=63  VL=78,470  (Oct 2010)
Prezista..Norvir..Truvada

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #4 on: November 16, 2006, 07:43:58 PM »
Hey Dad1216,

In the midst of the darkness it is cold, uncomfortable, and a lot of uncertainty. When there is a "light" that shines in that darkness, to some it is warm, comforting, and re-assuring. To some others, it is not.

Help me understand this...

If someone were to furnish knowledge to you that will help you rather than hurt you, then why in the world would you want to shut them up?


Make the BEST of each and every Day!
« Last Edit: November 16, 2006, 07:49:11 PM by Eldon »

Offline dad1216

  • Member
  • Posts: 135
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #5 on: November 16, 2006, 09:54:57 PM »
In the midst of the darkness it is cold, uncomfortable, and a lot of uncertainty.

I am sure it is, thankfully I have yet to ever be in this place.

When there is a "light" that shines in that darkness, to some it is warm, comforting, and re-assuring. To some others, it is not. 

To others, the "light" doesn't know as much as they think.

Help me understand this...

If someone were to furnish knowledge to you that will help you rather than hurt you, then why in the world would you want to shut them up? 

I would not shut someone up that is giving me knowledge, only the ones that tend to go on and on spewing out their "inner enlightenment" to someone that doesn't need it.  The "lights" always assume that they have a greater insight then anyone else. 

Besides....I was just getting a kick out of the website.  It would have been expected by my co-workers for me to have had one of those posters in my office.  Everything doesn't have to be so serious.

And from that website:

Quote
There is no greater joy than soaring high on the wings of your dreams, except maybe the joy of watching a dreamer who has nowhere to land but in the ocean of reality.

Dad

23 years HIV+ (Oct 88)
11 years AIDS (March 00)

CD4=83  VL=47,000  (May 2011)
CD4=63  VL=78,470  (Oct 2010)
Prezista..Norvir..Truvada

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #6 on: November 16, 2006, 10:31:30 PM »

1)To others, the "light" doesn't know as much as they think.

2)The "lights" always assume that they have a greater insight then anyone else. 


Hey Dad1216,

You are right in that aspect. Everything does not have to be so serious. Agreed.

1)Some of the "lights" do have knowledge and there are some "lights" who are still growing.

2)Not all of the "lights" make that assumption. There are some who do, and there are others who don't.

Make the BEST of each Day!


 
 

Offline dad1216

  • Member
  • Posts: 135
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #7 on: November 16, 2006, 10:43:25 PM »
23 years HIV+ (Oct 88)
11 years AIDS (March 00)

CD4=83  VL=47,000  (May 2011)
CD4=63  VL=78,470  (Oct 2010)
Prezista..Norvir..Truvada

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #8 on: November 16, 2006, 10:50:52 PM »
Hey Dad1216,


Thanks. LMAO I needed that! LOL!


Make the BEST of each Day!
 

Offline Joe K

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 3,877
  • 31 Years Poz
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2006, 11:35:19 AM »
Eldon,

The following is what I posted in Tims thread but I was confused and posted it here first.  Rather than removing it, I am leaving it as a reminder for all posters.

I urge you all to remember that the people behind the names and screens are as varied as the stars in the sky.  We each have our own challenges, abilities, hopes, fears and dreams and we choose to share ourselves with this forum.  I happen to be someone who faces severe challenges with my mental health and having dealt with it for decades I believe it allows me, no impels me to share some hard truths on posting.

When someone comes here and seriously talks about mental illness, either OCD, depression or whatever, the last thing that they need to read is that if they just THOUGHT PROPERLY, all their troubles would be over.  "Think positive and you will be positive or think negative and you will be negative," sorry, those words to someone looking for help is condescension to the enth degree.  It is one thing to offer thoughts of support, however you need to be mindful of your audience.  Did it ever occur to some of you that those of us with mental illnesses wish we could process information realistically but we cannot, BECAUSE WE HAVE AN ILLNESS.  So when you post something that insists that somehow we are at fault for our illness (where have I heard THAT before) it becomes like driving a knife into ones being.

Support is great and all I ask is that you try and remain sensitive to the particular author before just throwing advice around.  It is not true that all advice is equal, nor welcome.  I would hope that for those who are unable to relate to a post and address what the poster needs (not what you decide they need) then just pass that by.

Yes there are times when even well-intended posts can cut to the quick and much deeper than you might imagine.

« Last Edit: November 29, 2006, 07:41:09 PM by killfoile »

Offline Miss Philicia

  • Member
  • Posts: 24,511
  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #10 on: November 29, 2006, 12:14:46 PM »
::agrees::
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline ACinKC

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  • Bring it VIRUS! #2 Ranked In-crowd Member!
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2006, 01:45:06 PM »
I am a VERY positive person! (Pun intended) My attitude is the best of anyone I know.

As the GREAT Peter LeFluer said:

I found that if you have a goal, that you might not reach it. But if you don't have one, then you are never disappointed. And I gotta tell ya... it feels phenomenal.
« Last Edit: November 29, 2006, 01:51:18 PM by ACinKC »
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline NightmareHall

  • Member
  • Posts: 61
  • Out for a Sunday drive to Zeta Reticuli
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #12 on: November 29, 2006, 04:39:00 PM »
*
« Last Edit: December 14, 2006, 10:59:10 AM by NightmareHall »

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • Posts: 24,511
  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #13 on: November 29, 2006, 05:19:41 PM »
I strive to be neither overly pessimistic or overly optimistic with HIV.  I think it's called realism.  I find one as useless as the other in many respects.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Boo Radley

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  • Posts: 1,252
  • Not a "real man" and damn proud, mithter... FAB
    • Animal Rescue New Orleans
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #14 on: November 29, 2006, 05:59:17 PM »
... there is a REASON you read this entire message.

Boredom.

Quote
Make the BEST of each and every Day!

The next time I awaken and the first thought in my head is "why aren't you dead?" I'll try to remember.  Chronic depression often overpowers my ability to be optimistic but without my sense of humor I'd be long dead.

Boo
« Last Edit: November 29, 2006, 07:16:03 PM by Boo Radley »
String up every aristocrat!
Out with the priests and let them live on their fat!





Everything I do, say, think, excrete, secrete, exude, ooze, or write © 2007 Sweet Old Boo, Inc.

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #15 on: November 30, 2006, 02:00:40 AM »
Hey Joe,

I know what you mean. I can understand that. All I am saying is that it does help in some way for you. I too went through a period of Depression and I know what it is like.

I am just doing my BEST to help and not to offend. Perspective.

After my course, I do understand that there are others who are in a far off worse situation Joe. It hurts my heart to hear that it is a situation that you or others have to go through. Just be as strong as you can be man and work it out as best as you know how to.

Again, there are others like Boo has mentioned just as well. Its tough and just try to keep that spark of ever loving hope inside of you. We both are still talking to each other.

I am sending you positive thoughts your way. A tear was also shed to cleanse it.

Offline Miss Philicia

  • Member
  • Posts: 24,511
  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: Attitude Is Everything...
« Reply #16 on: November 30, 2006, 12:10:11 PM »
It's more the way you construct the premise of a thread.  In this one it was "think positive and everything will be OK" which is kind of extreme.  Like saying "pray to God that the earth stops rotating and it wil."  I think that's many people's objection distilled into a simplistic equation.

While I wholeheartedly will agree that there is power in positive thinking (and really this is the crux of cognitive behavioral therapy isn't it?) I'm not convinced that it's the panacea you present.  Personally I find it cathartic to have a good bitch session at times.  Do you not ever do that?

I find an absence of such bitch sessions kind of unhealthy.  I need highs AND lows for a fulfilled "normal" life, otherwise it just seems like someone took too much klonopin.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

 


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