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Author Topic: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..  (Read 4434 times)

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Offline mark1

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Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« on: November 26, 2006, 02:10:23 AM »
I am first time reader of this site. First of all I am so thank full for every one who is contributing their valuable time and knowledge in helping others through out the planet.

I had an un-protected oro-vaginal first time exposure in my life (in strip club-USA) with un known HIV status lap dancer about 10-12 seconds. I did touch her vagina with my lips very briefly (no tongue involved) and I did find some wetness but I am not sure that is my saliva or her vaginal fluids? After that nothing was happened and I came to home and check my lower lip and noticed some cracks and rough edges on my lower lip. That is the time I started getting nervous and sleep less nights. So far one week no symptoms other than sleeplessness and stressful headaches…

I spoke to Strip club manager about her, he told me that she may not have HIV and also he told me that she has two small kids.

I know I did big mistake and I should shame for my act.
At the end I request you, Please please please…help me. Is it I am going to have HIV positive? I need to go HIV testing?  Looking for your advise while spending sleepless nights....

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2006, 08:02:28 AM »
You are worrying needlessly. The incident you are concerned about was not a risky one for HIV.

Please read the lessons on this site about HIV transmission and testing. You can find a link to them in the Welcome thread which begins this section. By becoming better acquainted with these subjects you will know how to protect yourself, be able to enjoy your sexuality and not have to worry without cause as you have been over this incident.

This is not an HIV situation. Period.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline mark1

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #2 on: November 26, 2006, 12:09:39 PM »
Thank you Andy for your reply.
As per your advice, I gone through your welcome thread and read lot of archives about cunnilingus. Before this, I browsed lot of useless sites and got more stressed with my incident. I am so lucky I found this site…Great people, great knowledge sharing and great advises.

Again as per your advice I stop worrying and also I am not thinking go for HIV test. (Even though I felt very small dry crack on my lower lip after cunnilingus)

I know you guys are spending lot of time and money in operating this websites keep up running 24 X 7. Is there any way users like me can donate to help you guys? Please let me know.

Your guys/gals not just giving advises, more than that you are bringing lot of peace in worried families…Not every one get this kind of opportunity. Gerat job all. We won't forget you all.

Offline mark1

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #3 on: December 03, 2006, 12:50:07 AM »
Even after strong assurance by Andy, my brain again starts playing games with me after one week. I started re-thinking after I have seen some websites.. I am stressing again only because of my “cracked lip in oro-vaginal act”….Is it I am going to be get HIV by that? I need to be tested? Please just say YES or NO…I sincerely follow your advice. (If you think I a wasting your time, please accept my apology…I am so freaky person..this is my last question)

Thank you for your great advice...

Offline RapidRod

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #4 on: December 03, 2006, 03:56:48 AM »
Andy has already answered your questions. I see no use in repeating them.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #5 on: December 03, 2006, 10:22:21 AM »
Nothing has changed since our previous exchanges. You absolutely were not at risk for HIV in this incident.

This is not an incident which requires testing. But if you are going to anxiously drag this fear around then go ahead and get tested and collect the inevitable negative result.

The CDC recommends doing that at 13 weeks for a definitive answer. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after an exposure to the HIV virus. I certainly expect you will test negative if you decide you need to do that.

You're putting yourself through torture unnecessarily. I don't know how experienced you are sexually. What I suspect here is that the setting and circumstances of this incident are playing a part in your anxiety and shame. If I'm correct about that, do yourself a favor, accept this incident happened, take a breath, let it go and get on with your life. Really.

« Last Edit: December 03, 2006, 10:28:44 AM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline mark1

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #6 on: December 03, 2006, 11:41:46 AM »
Mr. Andy,
Your Qes: I don't know how experienced you are sexually?

Ans: I have no sexual experience with any other women expect my wife. Just 2 weeks back my friend drag me to lap dance and above was happend....that is it.

Your Comment: I suspect here is that the setting and circumstances of this incident are playing a part in your anxiety and shame. If I'm correct about that, do yourself a favor, accept this incident happened, take a breath, let it go and get on with your life. Really.

You are absolutely right. I am feeling shame. Thank you for your advise, i don't want to tested and I never ask any question on this incident. God Bless you Andy and RapidRod.
« Last Edit: December 03, 2006, 11:44:47 AM by mark1 »

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: oro-vaginal with cracked lip...Please help
« Reply #7 on: December 03, 2006, 05:26:58 PM »
OK, so now you have learned something about not doing things which aren't ok for you by your own standards. You know what to avoid in the future.

Glad you found the exchange here to be helpful.

Get on with your life.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline mark1

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Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #8 on: February 14, 2007, 01:48:54 PM »
I started getting awareness about HIV since I have my brief exposure via cunnillingus; I got clear response from "aidsmed Moderators" that nothing to worry about it (which happened 3 months back). I am ok for that incident & no worries.
Now I am collecting all my past mistakes, while reading some posts, suddenly I got some thing in my mind and want to clear that doubt with experts. I did marry for 12 years (completed). I clearly remember I had few times unprotected sex with women before my marriage that is 12 years before.(that time I never thought about HIV) I have no major illness since that and my regular blood works (general check up) coming fine until last 2006 expect some cholesterol. Other than that I have 2 kids with my wife in this 12 years period (youngest daughter is 7 months old) and my got got tested for HIV while her pregnancy and she got (-) ve for HIV  (I have no relation with any women after my marriage other than my wife since I got married)

My question is …Is it I need to worry about my mistakes what I did before my marriage (12 years abck)? Or any possibility for me has HIV in silent mode? Please give your expert opinion.

Million thanks to your reply and you guys have no idea how much you all are helping in stop spreading HIV in the global community.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #9 on: February 14, 2007, 01:57:59 PM »
Mark,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

The ONLY way to know your hiv status is through testing. Hiv can be present in the body, in some cases for many years, before there are any apparent symptoms. If you've had unprotected intercourse, the only way to know your status is to test.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mark1

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Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #10 on: February 14, 2007, 02:08:52 PM »
I agree with you test is the only way we can determine. I am going to test to bring down my anxiety. I am just wondering that, if I had, my wife suppose get it by now right? (I mean in 12 years, she got recently tested 9 months back).

Thanks for your reply.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2007, 02:14:03 PM »
Mark, what you were calling a risk in relation to giving oral to a woman wasn't a risk except in theory.

As far as those unprotected incidents of intercourse, that's another matter. Yes, you do have to get tested. What's very much in your favor is that HIV is not an easy virus to transmit. It's also significantly harder to accomplish from female to male.

It's very good that you're finally getting tested so that you can relieve yourself of this burden of guilt and fear you have been lugging around for way too long.

I expect you to test negative. Keep us posted on your result and good luck with the test.

Cheers,
« Last Edit: February 14, 2007, 02:16:57 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #12 on: February 14, 2007, 02:18:10 PM »
Mark,

Not necessarily. We have members here who were (unknowingly) with positive partners, in some cases years, without becoming infected themselves. Men and women.

Testing yourself is the ONLY way to know your own status. You cannot go by someone else's test result.

Like Andy, I also expect you to test negative. However, testing is the ONLY way to know for sure.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mark1

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #13 on: February 14, 2007, 04:23:29 PM »
Thank you Ann and Andy, I got an appointment for Rapid test tomorrow (they said will tell the result in 1 Hour). Is it ok I go through Rapid test or I need to go ELISA? Please let me know.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #14 on: February 14, 2007, 04:29:37 PM »
Mark,

A rapid test is a form of ELISA. It's all you need and yes, they are accurate.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mark1

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #15 on: February 15, 2007, 01:23:13 PM »
This is my 13th week of my Oral sex on women with cracked lip, I gone through Rapid test (Ora quick advance) in County office, as Andy said result came back negative or non reactive. I can’t tell how much this Aidsmed helped me to calm down…Please listen these people they are better than any HIV counselors.

Btw..these are my risks I tested for:
1)   Performed oral on Women 13 weeks back with cracked lip.
2)   Performed few unprotected sexual intercourses with women in 1994 (12 years back) or before my marriage.
Thanks you Andy, Ann and Rapid Rod.
BTW, this is my 13th week test, you think I need to go another test at 6 months? Or you want to forget about it? Please let me know. Again I can't tell how valuable this "aidsmeds.com" is....

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #16 on: February 15, 2007, 01:28:27 PM »
No need to test at 6 months you are conclusively negative! Congrats and use those condoms!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline mark1

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  • Posts: 10
I am Negative
« Reply #17 on: February 15, 2007, 05:10:43 PM »
Thanks you every one for your time and effort for helping me. I learnded lot about HIV in these 3 months and I hope I do pass the same info to some one to help stop spreading the HIV.

Basically all mistakes I did in my life was due to lack of awareness. If I am this much aware in 1994, I never done those. I do my best in future and same time I do thankyou again every one who helped me in these 3 months.

Again this is best website I never seen, and I do recommend to my kids whenever they are big.

Offline mark1

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Fingering with unbleed 3mm lacerated wound..please give your advise.
« Reply #18 on: January 16, 2008, 11:48:36 AM »
Hi..I am back with other question..Plese help me here...
I had a situation that end up with 5-6 minutes fingering a strip dancer (noticed fluid wetness also) and same time I forgot that I had a small 3mm laceration on my point finger 5 hours before while working on attic. But my 3mm laceration was not bleeding that time. I read several threads with same kind of subject but still I need some advise…last time I gone through lot of stress by ignoring your people adivse. Please give your opinion about testing and listen this time.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Fingering with unbleed 3mm lacerated wound..please give your advise.
« Reply #19 on: January 16, 2008, 11:52:21 AM »
Your question will not be answered until you return to your original thread.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Thinking about Exposure 12 years ago..
« Reply #20 on: January 16, 2008, 12:35:16 PM »
I've merged your threads. You've been told before about keeping all of your entries in this same thread. Please follow that rule.

Fingering is not a risk for HIV transmission, even with the bits you've thrown in about having had the finger injured earlier. Information about it is in our lesson on Transmission. You've been around here long enough to have gotten the basics down.

There's no need for testing since there wasn't any risk. 
Andy Velez

 


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