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Author Topic: Wally in a bucket .  (Read 1047 times)

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Offline Jeff G

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Wally in a bucket .
« on: August 13, 2014, 06:17:27 PM »
Im going to Coosa Island on Logan Martin lake this weekend to find my dads final resting place for his ashes . He was hours away from buying a house on the Island they day he died and was very excited about retiring there . He told me many times that if he could just live five more years and be able to just sit and look at the beautiful lake he would die a happy man . He didn't get his wish so I think its fitting that he be placed there where he most wanted to be .

Now this is where the wally in a bucket freaky part comes in . I made concrete reef ball out of his ashes that will open up after its in the lake water a few hours ... it turned out better than expected and I think he will be happy with the fishes swimming around him . I was a bit squeamish working with the the ashes at first but it went really well with little mess .

My step sister lives on the Island and when I told her what I wanted to do she got right on board and offered me a place to stay for the weekend, she called me back a bit ago and told me that many of his friends and the rest of her family is coming and now its turned into the kind of party my dad would have loved . There is a club house on the Island where there is a blues band that plays every week end . Its in an old marina and you bring whatever you want to drink and they pour it for you . My friend Tim wanted to come along so since there are going to be so many people there I'm bringing my huge cabin tent that's never been used and my queen sized air mattress that is super comfy and will sleep in there with my friend for the weekend . I'm very excited about it all now ... The band is excellent and the people are friendly so there will be barbeque, booze, great music and drunken dancing around a fire pit ... just like my daddy loved . The water is super clear and the swimming is great too .

If dad had bought that place he would have bought the marina and club house too and I would have been living there myself ... I came within a few hours of owning that place but I am glad I didn't . I have made amends with the owner but they threatened to sue me when I refused to go ahead and buy the place like my dad had planned but they now know I did what was best and there are no hard feelings .
Its a great place to visit and lovely as can be but that Island parties like there is no tomorrow and I do not need to be around that everyday and night ... but I do love to visit and this weekend it will be on and I will come home and say I am never going to drink again and I wont until the next time I visit .   

Offline OneTampa

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2014, 06:33:28 PM »
Jeff,

I have no doubt your father would be pleased with what you are doing in his memory. It is wonderful and loving.

Now excuse me, I have come all over verklempt and must retire to my study.

But before I go, I hope you find the "queen" size mattress and tent comfy for you and company.

Best to you.




"He is my oldest child. The shy and retiring one over there with the Haitian headdress serving pescaíto frito."

Offline tednlou2

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2014, 06:35:15 PM »
I love you're doing this.  What a fitting place.  It is very sad he didn't see his dream realized.  You're a good son. 

Offline bmancanfly

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2014, 06:48:13 PM »
I must admit I've never heard of a memorial reef ball before.  But that and the party sound like a fitting tribute to your dad.  I hope everyone enjoys themselves.

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt."

 Bertrand Russell

Offline tednlou2

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #4 on: August 13, 2014, 07:16:00 PM »
I've heard of the memorial reefs.  Heard of adding ashes into jewelry.  Aren't there some companies claiming to send ashes to space, once private companies get up there? 

There are stories of people smoking ashes in their weed.  And, Keith Richards snorted his dad's ashes.  Jeff, I like your tribute better. 

http://youtu.be/nk1PceITYvM

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #5 on: August 13, 2014, 07:22:49 PM »
I've heard of the memorial reefs.  Heard of adding ashes into jewelry.  Aren't there some companies claiming to send ashes to space, once private companies get up there? 

There are stories of people smoking ashes in their weed.  And, Keith Richards snorted his dad's ashes.  Jeff, I like your tribute better. 

http://youtu.be/nk1PceITYvM

I was careful and wore a mask when handling the ashes ... I read where Keith R. had a little snort and that was not for me LOL .

Offline mitch777

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #6 on: August 13, 2014, 08:13:26 PM »
What a beautiful story.
31 years hiv+ (oct. 2013) with a curtsy.

Offline intaglio

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #7 on: August 13, 2014, 08:53:16 PM »

Now excuse me, I have come all over verklempt and must retire to my study.

Yeah, someone's cutting onions near me.

Jeff,

That sounds like your dad's going to get a wonderful send-off.
Reality is frequently inaccurate.

Offline Theyer

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #8 on: August 14, 2014, 07:03:31 AM »
Moist eyes.
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline GSOgymrat

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #9 on: August 14, 2014, 09:53:03 AM »
What a wonderful way to remember your dad.

Offline wolfter

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #10 on: August 14, 2014, 12:04:18 PM »
I think your dad would be quite happy.  We're doing the final prep for my mother's ashes which is very similar.  Her most favorite spot was on the banks of the Ohio River in Meigs County.  We are planning to place her ashes on a cross and release them into the river.

I'm sure it'll be difficult yet therapeutic.  I'll reserve queen comments until you update us after the event. ;)

take care buddy
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #11 on: August 14, 2014, 12:07:21 PM »
Thanks for the comments ... and Greg, never put of what you can do today as the saying goes LOL .

Offline Jmarksto

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #12 on: August 14, 2014, 04:25:33 PM »
Jeff; 

My condolences on your father's passing, and I wish you well with the event.Your dad sounds like he was a fun and lively guy and your honoring him the way he would have appreciated.   At my father's funeral/wake I heard a number of funny and touching stories that I had not heard before - it was really unexpected and added warmth and humor to the event.

respectfully,
JM


03/15/12 Negative
06/15/12 Positive
07/11/12 CD4 790          VL 4,000
08/06/12 CD4 816/38%   VL 49,300
08/20/12 Started Complera
11/06/12 CD4   819/41% VL 38
02/11/13 CD4   935/41% VL UD
06/06/13 CD4   816/41% VL UD
10/28/13 CD4 1131/45%  VL 25
02/25/14 CD4   792/37%  VL UD
07/09/14 CD4 1004/39%   VL UD

Offline Almost2late

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #13 on: August 14, 2014, 04:40:56 PM »
That was a wonderful thing you done for your Dads memory... your a good son Jeff.. sorry for your loss
Atripla, Bactrim, Azithromycin
Date         CD4's          VL
02/14     13  2.79%    228k+
03/14     52       7%       3k-
04/14     not done          2k-
05/14     184     9%       595
06/14     117     8%       235  switched off Atripla
08/14     135    10%      110  stopped Azithromycin
Tivicay, Truvada, Bactrim

“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”
― Dr. Seuss

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― John Irving, The World According to Garp

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #14 on: August 14, 2014, 05:41:04 PM »
Thanks Guys ... Dad died in 2008 . He told me he wanted to be cremated but didn't want to end up on the mantel in a living room, so he has been staying on the buffet in my dining room instead . I cant keep the ashes forever so I thought this was something he would get a kick out of .

Offline phildinftlaudy

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #15 on: August 14, 2014, 06:49:03 PM »
Wow Jeff - I think this is completely awesome - your dad is going to love it - Somewhere he wanted to be, and a send off that he will enjoy.... The thought you have put into all of this and the way it is coming together says a lot... it is the way it is meant to be and happening exactly when it is supposed to happen.

Thanks for sharing...
September 13, 2008 - diagnosed +
Labs:
Date    CD4    %   VL     Date  CD4  %   VL
10/08  636    35  510   9/09 473  38 2900  12/4/09 Atripla
12/09  540    30    60   
12/10  740    41  <48   
8/11    667    36  <20  
03/12  1,041  42  <20
05/12  1,241  47  <20
08/12   780    37  <20
11/12   549    35  <20
02/12  1,102  42  <20
11/12   549    35  <20

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #16 on: August 14, 2014, 06:59:22 PM »
My step sis just called and told not to bring the circus tent ... She said it will be too much partying going on to sleep outside . I was looking forward to camping actually ... but not so much pacing all that crap up so its a king size bed and air conditioning this weekend .

I wish we could do a AMG at a lake in a secluded spot ... it would be off the hook fun and a good way to visit and not have distractions . I also know that I am the only one that thinks this is a good idea .

Online zach

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #17 on: August 14, 2014, 08:04:27 PM »
great way to spread his ashes jeff... exactly what i want, throw me out where i want to be.

be out there this weekend for a funeral myself, so if you catch the stench of weed and patchouli, hear somebody howlin your name, its just me hanging out the window on the way past

been a rough week
gonna go up to the mountain, for to find a little peace
looking over the valley, for the beauty i see
out across the hills, forevermore

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #18 on: August 14, 2014, 08:55:38 PM »
great way to spread his ashes jeff... exactly what i want, throw me out where i want to be.

be out there this weekend for a funeral myself, so if you catch the stench of weed and patchouli, hear somebody howlin your name, its just me hanging out the window on the way past

been a rough week

You will be on my mind Zack .

Offline Basquo

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #19 on: August 14, 2014, 10:07:48 PM »
Sounds like a great plan and tribute! And thank you for not dumping the cremains into a waterfall that feeds directly into a public swimming area (not that I wouldn't swim with your dad, but if it's anonymous, it's freaky to see.)

Offline britchick

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #20 on: August 15, 2014, 12:24:49 PM »
Thinking of you,your family and friends this weekend.What a lovely tribute.Sounds like it's going to be very special.

britchickxx

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #21 on: August 17, 2014, 01:37:34 PM »
We had a great weekend at the lake and I was on my best behavior and only had a about 10 beers all weekend . It was nice to get away and I was able to reconnect with some people I don't get to see often . The memorial service was perfect ... we had two pontoon boats full of people and it was a nice send off ... dad would have been proud .

The people who live on the island came by and brought food and even cooked us breakfast on saturday morning ... I needed to get away more than I realized and feel recharged this morning .

Offline WillyWump

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #22 on: August 17, 2014, 08:28:03 PM »
Wow Jeff, it all sounds amazing, and such a fitting place to rest for a great man.

I see that you've had your dads ashes for 8 years before doing this. This has helped me because I've struggled with parting with my moms ashes, she's still in my living room in a small cherrywood box after 2 years. I've felt bad for not giving her a final resting place yet but her wishes were to be spread "In a place where I feel peace" and quite frankly nothing in south Texas is peaceful. So I am planning a trip with my son next year to either a lighthouse in Maine (I cant remember that one farthest north on the BAy of Fundy) Or the Rocky Mountains, or maybe both. Anyways enough about me....congrats on your great weekend and your fantastic send off. Your dad would be most proud ;)

Ps- me and some buddies once mixed our friend into an 8ball of cocaine and snorted him off a bar in Austin where he had worked.
POZ since '08

Last Labs-
6/3/14 CD4- 736, UD 34%
6/25/13 CD4- 1036, UD,
2/4/13, CD4 - 489, UD, 28%

Current Meds: Prezista/Epzicom/ Norvir
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Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #23 on: August 17, 2014, 08:37:01 PM »
Thanks Willy ... I know when the time is right you will know what to do with your mom .
The worst I ever did with ashes was pour them off a dock into the face of a screaming sea lion who happened to be under the dock napping ... scared the crap out of him and then sent us running and screaming for the car  .

Offline WillyWump

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #24 on: August 17, 2014, 08:41:39 PM »

The worst I ever did with ashes was pour them off a dock into the face of a screaming sea lion who happened to be under the dock napping ... scared the crap out of him and then sent us running and screaming for the car  .

LMAO!!!
POZ since '08

Last Labs-
6/3/14 CD4- 736, UD 34%
6/25/13 CD4- 1036, UD,
2/4/13, CD4 - 489, UD, 28%

Current Meds: Prezista/Epzicom/ Norvir
.

Offline wolfter

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #25 on: August 18, 2014, 05:08:05 AM »
where are the naked pics?  somehow I got the impression there was some skinny dipping? 

This seems like a fitting tribute and I'm sure your dad would approve.  You'll always have a place to visit where his spirit will resonate.

Not sure how you all are able to deal with remains sitting around.  That was one of the few arguments we had with mother's passing this Summer.  There was no way in HELL I was keeping them.  My siblings were all as adamant.  My only sister who is also the youngest won the vote.  We explained that it was her duty...so wrong, yet so right.  :)
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #26 on: August 18, 2014, 09:16:43 AM »
where are the naked pics?  somehow I got the impression there was some skinny dipping? 

This seems like a fitting tribute and I'm sure your dad would approve.  You'll always have a place to visit where his spirit will resonate.

Not sure how you all are able to deal with remains sitting around.  That was one of the few arguments we had with mother's passing this Summer.  There was no way in HELL I was keeping them.  My siblings were all as adamant.  My only sister who is also the youngest won the vote.  We explained that it was her duty...so wrong, yet so right.  :)

It did not bother me having his ashes here at all . I know that I cant keep them forever and feel it was the right time to find his place to rest . We chose a spot out in the lake right out from the place he wanted to be in his retirement . He is in about 25 feet of water in an area that never becomes dry when they drop the lake water level for winter .

No naked pics or skinny dipping ... It sounds like your memorial services are a bit different than what we do around here LOL .   

Offline bubba53

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #27 on: August 18, 2014, 10:43:28 AM »
WOW ! Now that's the way to have a service , What a great Time and place ,
Good for you Jeff !!!

Offline AlanBama

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #28 on: August 18, 2014, 05:10:01 PM »
So glad you were able to comply with his wishes; a great tribute from a great guy! We love you, 
Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline ImisstheOldTimes

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Re: Wally in a bucket .
« Reply #29 on: August 20, 2014, 04:48:04 PM »
Jeff,

I am so glad you were able to do something fitting for your dad. My dad is in an eagle statue at my mom's...sometimes she isn't happy with him, she'll have me put him in the closet. She can't lift him, the urn is way to heavy.  Anyway, glad you were able to put him in a happy place among the fishies. :)

By the Way, the thing you told Willy about dumping the ashes in an angry sea lion's face.... ;D

Hill
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Heidi
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