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Author Topic: Casual serodiscordant relationship  (Read 614 times)

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Offline Eireguy

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
Casual serodiscordant relationship
« on: August 13, 2014, 12:03:57 PM »
Hey everyone.

I'm just looking for a bit of advise...

I started dating a guy a few weeks back. We are getting on good. I asked him what he was looking for and he said he's not looking for anything serious because he's not long out of a relationship. He also said that it's not that it would never happen.

The issue is that I haven't disclosed yet (we haven't done anything except kiss yet). I think he wants a casual thing to begin. If I disclose I'm wondering is he going to run a mile. Should I just forget about it and try and keep a friend only. I like him though.

Any advise from people that went through similar or otherwise would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance :)

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,165
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Casual serodiscordant relationship
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2014, 12:08:56 PM »
Welcome.

Have you disclosed yet to potential partners or is this the first time?

"Should I just forget about it and try and keep a friend only."  No thats the least sensible option. 

Try a disclosure before you invest too much of yourself in the attraction. If he can't deal, it will be not such a big deal. 
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Eireguy

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
Re: Casual serodiscordant relationship
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2014, 12:14:26 PM »
It's not the first time no. The last few guys that I disclosed to it didn't go so well though so I guess I'm reluctant to let my guard down again. If it is only something casual he wants I just think maybe it would never work

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,165
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Casual serodiscordant relationship
« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2014, 03:16:41 PM »
Its all annoying but it shakes down like this. 
You can't guess the response or control the response.
Casual sex with HIV+ might be on his OK list while relationship with HIV+ might be on the No list. Or the reverse. Or ABCD whatever combinations.
Seeing that you are "dating" - first off - bravo for that - and second, disclosure seems unavoidable, sooner or later...
Basically you don't really want to be having sex and socialising with someone who wouldn't want you if knowing you are HIV+.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline elf

  • Member
  • Posts: 617
Re: Casual serodiscordant relationship
« Reply #4 on: August 13, 2014, 08:13:31 PM »
What does the say about Truvada?

Offline timmm55

  • Member
  • Posts: 17
  • Unapologetically HIV Undetectable
Re: Casual serodiscordant relationship
« Reply #5 on: August 27, 2014, 03:04:26 PM »
I'm up front about it, on every online profile and open about it when I meet. I don't have a problem with it, if they do....too bad!

Just get it out of the way. Are you undetectable? That opens up a few avenues if he is knowledgeable.

 


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