HIV Prevention and Testing > Am I Infected?

I am just gone crazy or am I in the tunnel of hell


Well folks I already just typed this once, but got erased..oops.  Anyhow to my crazy story.  In the beginning of the year I was out of town on a work trip and having a good time after a good day.  i was in the hotel tossing them back with some buddies from work and I met this friendly lady and we had some drinks.  I was completely loaded at this point so I said I was going up to my room and everyone else felt the same.  The girl said she was on the same floor and I said cool.  I went to room ready to pass the hell out after I drank about 20 vodka drinks.  Next thing there is a knock and it is the female and she says she is locked out, so I said just use my phone and call the front desk.  I shut my eyes for a few seconds and I swear the next thing you know is my unit is in her mouth..I realized what was going on and pushed her off and I was pretty upset and she started to cry...That was one thing and told her to go.  I do not due stuff like that, I am married and got a kid on the way.  Anyhow she left and I thought OK no big deal she gave me a small blow job....Then I got home and it was like an anxiety bomb went off after reading stuff on the web about getting HIV from a BJ, I went completely nut-so.  Have been to the doctor over 20 times in the last 5 months.  I got tested at 2,7,10,13 all neg.  After the week 13 test I thouhgt this was over, I was in counseling and doing a lot better...Then another bomb floated in my insurance called and said I needed blood work for an increase in coverage.  So I started to freak out, they came over drew the blood and then a went bananas...I got sick from what seemed a head cold because my wife was ill to, then I started getting crazy systems like severe body aches, twitching, tingling in my feet and hands...So I had a nervous breakdown and feel like I am playing waiting game again, I have another 4 weeks till it will be 24 weeks...yada..I mean do think this could all be in my head or is HIV really invading my body...What should I do I am going completely certified nut-so?  Also I did contact the girl and she said she got tested and was neg, but do I believe?

simply put.  you do not get hiv from getting a blowjob.

It doesn't happen.  Period.  Full stop.  No if's and's or but's.

You were never at risk for hiv in the first place.

Please read the 'welcome' thread at the top of this forum.   It has links to 'lessons on transmission' that you should read over thoroughly.

You are absolutely hiv negative.

Andy Velez:
Just to echo what Dingo has said, you have absolutely no basis in HIV science for concern about your HIV status in relation to this incident.

There's never been a single documented case of HIV transmission to someone getting a blowjob in the history of the epidemic. And you aren't going to make history by becoming the first.

Whatever may have gone on with you physically has nothing to do with HIV and if you still have symptoms you need to discuss them with your doctor.

Avoid situations in the future where you drink excessively. It never leads to anything good and in terms of safer sex it's a serious impediment. Also, read the lesson on Transmission on this site as it will answer many questions you may have about the issue.

This time out you're ok as far as HIV is concerned.


I can't get through this crap..I took another test at 6 months and it was negative..I thought things were good, then monday I woke up with a rash on my chest..I thought well it must be a heat rash and now it is friday and it looks the same...I have lost my mind

Andy Velez:
Well, I don't know what you have lost or not, but I do know that you have reliably tested negative for HIV. You are HIV negative. Period. End of story.

And if you are going to continue to filter everything that happens or doesn't happen to you physically through a mindset that insists on thinking it's about HIV, then you will drive yourself nutz for sure.

If you are having physical problems you should discuss them with your doctor.

This is not an HIV situation. Period.

I suspect this is really about guilt because being a dog like the rest of us, you went straying. You're not doing yourself, your wife or the baby you were expecting any favor by dragging this issue around and keeping it in your lives. HIV is not the issue. Guilt is. The best thing you can do for all concerned is to take a breath, accept that part of your personal history and then let it go. No kidding. That's the most loving thing you can do for all concerned.



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