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Author Topic: Am i being too paranoid ??  (Read 386 times)

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Offline redrobot

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  • Posts: 19
Am i being too paranoid ??
« on: May 26, 2014, 06:26:45 AM »
Hi you all,
[Quick background] I've been HIV positive since I was 17, I'm 36 now. I've been undetectable for over 10 years [even though I smoked heroin for about 7 of those 10 years]. I've always been very conscience and careful about my status ... almost to the point of obsession. Even in the past when I was as high as a kite on drugs, the thought never left/leaves my mind and I never let anyone touch me if I'm bleeding. Infecting someone would be my worst nightmare. I don't think I could leave with myself.

In the past few months I've been worrying quite a bit about my little nephew. He lived with my mum [mainly] and me since he was a baby, he's 17 now, and for the last 2/3 years he's been getting ill all the time [he was never the most healthier child growing up]. He gets colds all the time [even a lot more often then me and during summer months] and every few weeks he comes down with something. He also gets injured all the time when he plays football with his mates.
About 3 months ago he woke up vomiting, felt sick in the stomach, couldn't hold any food down, we went to the Hospital, got prescribed something and he was OK the next day, but since then he developed this dry cough that doesn't go away. There are days that it looks like it's gone, but the next day it comes back. Just this morning he's complaining his leg hurts and he's not feeling too well [and he keeps coughing].

Now, he doesn't smoke, I did for 22 years but I quit 2 weeks ago and haven't smoked inside the house for over 10 years, so I don't think smoking catarrh is the culprit in regards to his persistent cough. 

I've been meaning to take him to a doctor for a while for blood tests and all that, but in the past few months he started regular contact with his father [who lives in a different city] and he's only home 2 days a week for college [It seems the persistent cough is not worrying his father one bit]. Tired of feeling overwhelming worry I told him he had to stay over for a few more days this week so we could go to a doctor [kids are off school this week]. I called the clinic this morning but I forgot it's bank holiday here in the UK [ffs]. I'm gonna call the clinic back tomorrow. He's going back to his dad on Wednesday or Thursday. Hopefully we've seen a doctor by then, if not, I'm going to make him stay in town until he's been checked out.

Being very self conscious as I am, I'm already thinking the worse and that I infected my nephew somehow.

Do guys think I'm being too paranoid ??



PS - I'm sorry but I needed to vent all this.
« Last Edit: May 26, 2014, 06:30:14 AM by redrobot »

Offline redrobot

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Re: Freaking out or just paranoid ??
« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2014, 06:27:55 AM »
What's worrying me even more is that he's got a girlfriend [she's only 16].
He's assured me he hasn't had sex with her yet [they stayed over at mine last night but I made'em sleep in different beds] but I really need to get his blood tests over and done with and move on.
« Last Edit: May 26, 2014, 06:53:27 AM by redrobot »

Offline BT65

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Re: Am i being too paranoid ??
« Reply #2 on: May 26, 2014, 06:51:24 AM »
Did you share drug injection equipment with him?  Have sex with him?  Breast feed him, or bleed into an open sore he had?  If not, then yes, you're being paranoid. 

I would try to look into something else as a cause for his cough.  Has he ever been checked out for asthma?  Right now I can't think of other reasons for having a continuous cough, but I'm sure there are some (reasons). 

I would not start projecting him having HIV from you somehow.  If none of the above situations occurred, then quit worrying about this.  My daughter was ill a lot when she was growing up, a lot from having allergies/asthma, and she would get secondary illnesses.  Just relax and let the doctor you see figure this out.  Good luck!

Betty
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline redrobot

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Re: Am i being too paranoid ??
« Reply #3 on: May 26, 2014, 07:10:05 AM »
Thanks for your reply BT65.

No, I have never shared or done such things with him.
I don't think he's ever had even a cigarette in his life. He's a very nice lad and well behaved. The closest he's come to having drugs in his system was through smelling my weed when I used to smoke it few years back.  :-[

You right about me not start projecting him having HIV... and I haven't done that. No way. I don't wanna freak him out. I've only shared my worries with my mum [she's on holiday outside UK] and I've only done that yesterday. She's also said I'm being a bit paranoid and I should just take him to the doctor for a check up.

I also thought of Asthma. We've got a history of asthma and bronchitis in the family.  My mum has it and I had it when I was a teenager [but thankfully went away after 3/4 years]. I'm telling the doctor that when I see him.

Thanks once again BT.

Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Am i being too paranoid ??
« Reply #4 on: May 26, 2014, 09:24:22 AM »
I agree with the others . If he does HIV ... and he probably does not, then it did not come from you . Even though I am educated about HIV years ago I too have worried in the back of my mind about infecting a loved one even when I knew it to be impossible . I bet what you are feeling is something allot of have us have thought about .

 


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