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Author Topic: HIV Anxiety  (Read 637 times)

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Offline Bobob85

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HIV Anxiety
« on: May 24, 2014, 05:26:34 PM »
Dear all,

I hope this is the correct place to post this.

I am a 29-year-old gay male living in a European country and I would like something that probably most of you experienced already - unreasonable anxiety about being infected with HIV.

I occasionally have sex with men, although I didn't have so many sexual partners as most of my gay (or even straight) friends. I usually practice unprotected oral sex and I never take semen into my mouth and protected insertive or receptive anal sex.
There was never any incident of condom failure (and, as every person who is OCD about STDs, I always inspect condoms after the intercourse). I know that a broken condom would totally freak me out so I can never relax during sex as I always picture myself at the hospital waiting to get PEP. I don't ask people about their HIV status (I don't know why but I think it could be a little disrespectful in a world where there are codoms and you can protect yourself), however, I always assume that my partner is HIV+ and nobody ever insisted on bareback sex. Nevertheless, every date is followed by extensive research next day about whether I could be infected: is fingering risky or not, is blood on an intact condom ok or not, could condom have failed without me noticing it etc. I already know this forum by heart! This is just killing me and sometimes, I prefer just not to have sex knowing how paranoid I will become. This affects my personal and professional life - I can't remember how many work hours I have spent searching for hiv symptoms. Even in a relationship of two years I never agreed to have unprotected penetrative sex.

How do you guys cope with this? There must be many negative people who are in a relationship with a positive person; or positive users who don't want to endanger their partners? Or people who are negative and just come here to find consolation, as I do, almost after each date? My next test is due ok Friday and I am freaking out already!

Looking forward to hearing from you guys,

Tom


Offline Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: HIV Anxiety
« Reply #1 on: May 24, 2014, 06:37:45 PM »
There is nothing you mention that is a risk for HIV that you have done .

You have an HIV phobia and we can't address those issues . You are already educated on what is and is not a risk so there is not much more we can do other than urge you to get the mental health care you need to recover from your irrational fear of HIV .


Offline Jeff G

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  • Member
  • Posts: 11,389
  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: HIV Anxiety
« Reply #2 on: May 26, 2014, 09:49:32 PM »
I removed you post from another members thread . You are only permitted to post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or the subject matter . You can visit your profile and select show own post and it will take you here . Thanks .

 


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