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Author Topic: What the other side is thinking  (Read 708 times)

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Offline buginme2

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  • Posts: 3,279
What the other side is thinking
« on: April 25, 2014, 05:41:54 AM »
Mark King made a video interviewing 4 HIV negative gay men about their feelings about HIV and HIV positive gay men.  Worth a look at, kind of interesting

http://huff.to/1iRV767
Don't be fancy, just get dancey

Offline emeraldize

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  • Posts: 3,365
Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #1 on: April 25, 2014, 08:11:41 AM »
While the content is interesting and diverse, Mark needs help in editing with sound. It turned a well-intentioned effort into a an acoustic challenge. Critique aside, thank you for posting this.

Offline leatherman

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  • Google and HIV meds are Your Friends
Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2014, 09:52:00 AM »
i watched this and wondered: just how many HIV - MSM understand UD and PrEP? These men seemed much much more educated than the vast majority of HIV- MSM that I have spoken with in my area.
leatherman (aka mIkIE)


chart from 1992-2013; updated 2/09/13  Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada

Offline wolfter

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #3 on: April 25, 2014, 12:25:59 PM »
The one most likely to end up HIV+ is the only one who said he'd never sleep with someone who told him they were positive.  He then went on to say that he believes people when they indicate they're negative. 
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Bizkits

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #4 on: April 25, 2014, 01:51:54 PM »
The one most likely to end up HIV+ is the only one who said he'd never sleep with someone who told him they were positive.  He then went on to say that he believes people when they indicate they're negative. 

That's what got me. (He told me he was neg). I never had a problem with poz guys, especially ones that were well educated about their condition and UD. I always almost preferred to be with poz/UD guys.

Offline leatherman

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  • Google and HIV meds are Your Friends
Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #5 on: April 25, 2014, 02:35:07 PM »
He then went on to say that he believes people when they indicate they're negative.
every once in a while I catch some HIV-related agency post on FB or twitter some caution about first asking the status of a potential partner. I ALWAYS respond about how that is the worst advice imaginable. If 25% or so of those who are positive don't even know, then asking about about a status is like spitting in the wind - it'll come back to hit you in the face!

Never trust someone who tells you they are negative. They may not know, or they may only be negative as far as their last test.

Although I wonder, should you trust someone who discloses being positive and says that they are undetectable? Are those people more trustworthy and/or knowledgeable so you could accept them at their word?
leatherman (aka mIkIE)


chart from 1992-2013; updated 2/09/13  Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada

Offline wolfter

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #6 on: April 25, 2014, 03:32:56 PM »

Although I wonder, should you trust someone who discloses being positive and says that they are undetectable? Are those people more trustworthy and/or knowledgeable so you could accept them at their word?

Strictly a guess, but I would imagine that to be true.  Someone comfortable enough in their own skin to disclose their status probably wouldn't lie about being UD.  If so, they'd probably be likely to just lie about their status.

Not much difference when being with another UD pozzie who says bareback sex is safe and they're not infected with any other virus.  :)  Life is a cost/benefit analysis.  ;)
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Bizkits

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #7 on: April 25, 2014, 05:20:55 PM »
Strictly a guess, but I would imagine that to be true.  Someone comfortable enough in their own skin to disclose their status probably wouldn't lie about being UD.  If so, they'd probably be likely to just lie about their status.

Not much difference when being with another UD pozzie who says bareback sex is safe and they're not infected with any other virus.  :)  Life is a cost/benefit analysis.  ;)

I tend to believe there is some truth to that, absolutely. However, I have to wonder nowadays with "UD" being more widely heard and used that that is only thing people are worried about? Like you said, there are other things besides hiv. Also, I've even heard some say "UD" is almost like being neg. If that becomes more and more accepted, could your last VL test pseudo-replace your last hiv test?

Again, like you said, someone comfortable enough in their own skin to say they're poz and UD likely knows that.

Offline wolfter

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #8 on: April 25, 2014, 05:34:07 PM »
I'm making another assumption here but if a person is truly UD, that means they're probably under the care of a doctor who is thoroughly testing for other diseases.  My doctor does as I'm quite honest about my sexual hookups dates.

I'm an old fashioned gurl, if I'm strictly dating someone for the evening, I'm leaving nothing to trust and insisting upon safer sex.  On the second date?  that's a toss up.  :)

Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline Bizkits

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Re: What the other side is thinking
« Reply #9 on: April 26, 2014, 11:06:22 AM »
I'm making another assumption here but if a person is truly UD, that means they're probably under the care of a doctor who is thoroughly testing for other diseases.  My doctor does as I'm quite honest about my sexual hookups dates.

I'm an old fashioned gurl, if I'm strictly dating someone for the evening, I'm leaving nothing to trust and insisting upon safer sex.  On the second date?  that's a toss up.  :)



Lol yeah, I hear ya. I can honestly say I don't know and doubt I'm UD at this point as I've only been on meds for a week and a half...my next labs aren't until 5/19. I'd tell someone that too (if we were heading towards a...um...date...yeah, date).  My doc has also tested for everything under the sun. When I first started hanging out with my now partner, he was already poz and had been for a number of years. I guess I've learned the term now serosorting because that's what he did. I didn't understand that at all until now. (And if you're thinking to yourself well if he serosorted, how did he end up with you, being neg at the time? Long story). As far as things being a toss up, well, I don't know that I'd leave it to chance either with someone who I didn't know and trust and who didn't truly know their status.

 


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