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Author Topic: Dating a guy with HPV  (Read 2784 times)

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Offline thatpaulieguy

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Dating a guy with HPV
« on: January 30, 2014, 09:59:30 AM »
So everything is going great for me, I found out that I am now undetectable.  My health has been going great and I'm going back to work.  I met a guy and he is so sweet and charming, he told me he has hpv, only on his anus and the warts went away after using a cream on them for a while.  I'm kinda freaking out, I like him but im worried and looking for some answers is all.  If he is topping me and I stay away from his anal area would I be safe?
“Stop being tormented by everyone else’s reaction to you.” - Joyce Meyer

Offline mecch

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2014, 10:52:09 AM »
My doctor told me almost ALL HIV+ gay men have HPV.  Something like 2/3 of HIV negative gay men have HPV. 
Do you know your own HPV status? If by the slim (but happy) chance you made it this far without HPV, maybe you can get the vaccine.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline thatpaulieguy

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2014, 11:36:18 AM »
I don't know my HPV status, I was told that there was no test to figure it out in men either
“Stop being tormented by everyone else’s reaction to you.” - Joyce Meyer

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2014, 11:42:37 AM »
I don't know my HPV status, I was told that there was no test to figure it out in men either

Doctors can perform a pap smear culture to check for HPV . Its shocking how many doctors do not know a pap can be done on a man .

Offline thatpaulieguy

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2014, 11:45:35 AM »
Oh ok I didn't know that, so what if I already have it then he can't give it to me?
“Stop being tormented by everyone else’s reaction to you.” - Joyce Meyer

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #5 on: January 30, 2014, 12:03:18 PM »
Oh ok I didn't know that, so what if I already have it then he can't give it to me?

HPV is transmitted from skin to skin contact . If he has been successfully treated and you use condoms it can reduce the risk of exposure . HPV can be transmitted to different areas of the body from skin to skin contact .

Offline Ann

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #6 on: January 30, 2014, 12:48:39 PM »
There are more than 40 different types of HPV that can infect the genital and oral areas of both men and women.

Of course the CDC doesn't recommend anal PAP smears for men (PAP smears are how they check a women's cervix) but the CDC is notoriously homophobic - all you have to do is look at some of their hiv transmission information to see what I mean. Hopefully they'll get dragged into the 21st century soon. ::)
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

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Offline mecch

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #7 on: January 30, 2014, 04:19:21 PM »
Oh ok I didn't know that, so what if I already have it then he can't give it to me?
I don't have info to respond to that good question.  DO you have a good doctor who you can give you answers about your own status, the vaccine, etc.... 
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline pittman

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #8 on: January 31, 2014, 10:53:49 PM »
not only do most HIV+ men have HPV, most sexually active people have it.  Some may get warts, which can be treated.

For most, they never have symptoms or are ever aware of it. For women, it's a significant factor in cervical cancer later in life. For HIV+ men, it is a serious risk factor for anal cancer.

If you do not have it, you can get a vaccine. Most likely you already have it though, AND you should be getting regular screenings for anal dysplasia.

Offline buca45

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2014, 01:59:27 AM »
I do not know why every HIV specialist does not do pap smears for HPV on EVERYONE of their male patients.
My clinic is one of few I have heard of that requires this be done on a yearly basis. Since I had them prior to seeing him 10 yrs ago (had a breakout then) they went on a do the exam of my butt to make sure none have made a repeat performance.
Last March during my yearly physical (which I am doing tomorrow) they discovered two warts deep inside and treated them immediately.
While I was laying on my side with their camera up my butt, they saw them, took biopsies and gave me the crème to remove them. IT was hard as hell to get it to stick but in under  a week they disappeared.
It doesn't matter where on his body he has them, but from experience, HPV can be contracted even though you practice safer sex every time. Not to break your happiness bubble, but if you are negative, I would reconsider having sex with this person and would honestly seek others who are HPV free aswell. Having had them for YEARS now, I curse the man who gave them to me while I was still a teen years ago.
These freaking warts are the gift that keep on giving and something you do not want around your jewels.
"Love and Laughter and Happiness Ever After"

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2014, 08:03:39 AM »

 Not to break your happiness bubble, but if you are negative, I would reconsider having sex with this person and would honestly seek others who are HPV free aswell.


That would be serosorting in the extreme and eliminate about 90% of the dating pool seeing as how most all sexually active adults are positive for HPV . 

Edited to add this .. About 20 million Americans ages 15 to 49 currently have HPV. And at least half of all sexually active men and women get genital HPV at some time in their lives. I over stated the statistics but the truth is its hard to avoid HPV in the dating scene .
« Last Edit: February 24, 2014, 08:39:28 AM by Jeff G »

Offline eric48

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #11 on: February 24, 2014, 08:36:23 AM »
... seek others who are HPV free aswell. ...

Good Luck!!!
Mobile.eric
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Online Miss Philicia

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #12 on: February 24, 2014, 09:33:04 AM »
Not to break your happiness bubble, but if you are negative, I would reconsider having sex with this person and would honestly seek others who are HPV free aswell. Having had them for YEARS now, I curse the man who gave them to me while I was still a teen years ago.
These freaking warts are the gift that keep on giving and something you do not want around your jewels.

I had anal warts in 1998, so bad in fact they finally had to surgically remove them after various treatments did not eliminate them. 16 years later I've never had one return, and yes I am inspected annually.

While I empathize with your situation of having them recur, that doesn't mean it's what happens for everyone else and I find your advice rather discriminatory and ill-advised.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #13 on: February 24, 2014, 02:20:12 PM »
While I empathize with your situation of having them recur, that doesn't mean it's what happens for everyone else and I find your advice rather discriminatory and ill-advised.

Agreed.  I actually had vaginal warts burned off back in like 1983 or '84 and have never had a recurrence.  The doctor at that time did not say it was HPV, nor did he biopsy it.  He said "you have vaginal warts, I'm going to burn them off."  And that was it.  I'm assuming it was HPV since I don't know what else would cause them.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline buginme2

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #14 on: February 24, 2014, 03:17:11 PM »
It should also be noted that you can have HPV and not now it.  While warts can occur they don't always.  It depends on the strain of HPV.  In fact, the strains that are the most worrisome that can lead to cancer do not cause warts.  The strains that cause warts usually do not progress to cancer.  Most people are infected with more than one strain.  Something like 95% of all HIV positive men and women have HPV. 

If your limiting yourself to dating only people HPV negative, then you have drastically limited your dating pool.

Everyone with HIV should be screened regularly. 
Don't be fancy, just get dancey

Offline RobbyR

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #15 on: February 24, 2014, 06:48:57 PM »
I have struggled with this for some time, ever since my doctor did a routine HPV anal pap for her gay male patients. I don't get why routine anal paps are routine for all gay male patients, HIV pos or not..I had a pap and mine showed LSIL, low-grade HPV, the non-wart kind.

But all my docs assured me not to read too much into one result. In fact, most people probably have HPV at some point. If you're sexually active & HIV positive, you probably have HPV too. Taking care of yourself, not smoking, doing drugs, & making sure your viral load is in good shape is one thing you can do to help mitigate against it, but the main thins is to FIND A GOOD COLORECTAL DOC who can treat you as needed, do paps, or high-res anoscopies. These should be done semi-regularly if hpv shows up. You certainly don't want to do nothing & a few years later end up with anal cancer. The name of the game is being proactive.

I say, by all means, get an anal pap!! And find a good colorectal doctor who knows about hiv/hpv issues in gay men, that just makes it easier to have a doctor who knows about such things, since many colorectal doctors still are unfamiliar with this.

I've had a few colorectal docs who didn't seem to know what the hell they were talking about with HPV. So I researched & found a great doctor in another city who is hoping to start an anal dysplasia clinic for gay men with hpv & other issues.

As he told me, unfortunately, many hiv docs & primary care docs simply don't understand the risks of hpv & there is not consensus among many of them about whether to do routine paps or high-res anoscopies.

I am so thankful I finally found a good knowledgeable colorectal doc, because he is very familiar with this & will be doing a high-res anoscopy on me in a few weeks, & I feel like I have someone in my corner now who understands.

Started Atripla August, 2010.

Offline buca45

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #16 on: February 26, 2014, 01:33:34 AM »
Here I am cruising through the forums only to come across my name on an answer I DID NOT POST!!!
I have not posted anything on this forum since asking about my now cancelled move to Texas in December(?) so I have no idea how or why this came up under my name?
Is it possible that my acct was hacked or someone else has the same name I do? What is going on here? I seriously did not advise anyone to stay away from a person who has been diagnosed with HPV!!!!!!
Seriously...I did not post the comment above and I am not too happy to see this fucked up message with my name on it.
You know, about 3-4+ years ago I had some SERIOUS issues with someone from this forum going onto other online forums posting some nasty ass things about me which prompted the administrators of AIDSMEDS to post the warning about privacy above. Now I have some idiotic jackass posting comments with misleading information and my name is on them? WTF? I did not post this comment...seriously!! Is there a way of removing the offensive comment as I did not post it? This is really pissing me off now...first I have to deal with people stalking me onto other forums now this shit?
What is up with this forum? I come on maybe once every four or five months usually not commenting just reading articles and topics of interest to me. Now I have some jackass handing out some f'ed up information that is not at all what I would advise a person to do.
I think I need to stay away from here and just read the magazine as this is getting to be too much!!
I apologize to the OP of this question for the idiotic advise that was given out under my screenname. I would never tell anyone to avoid another person for having HPV.
To any of the moderators here...could you please remove the above post as I did not post it?
"Love and Laughter and Happiness Ever After"

Offline mecch

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #17 on: February 26, 2014, 02:04:54 AM »
Buca is this one not yours, either?

Why read  yet another book by some narcisstic  man who lived the same life most of us did years ago that landed us where we are now? If I wanted to be entertained by the sexual exploits he went through, I would read my own stories of the hundred thousand men I had sex with over a 20+ year romp around the country.
What little I did read of it was SO boring and nothing I had not heard before. How many different ways is there to write the same story over and over.
Sorry for my cranky attitude. Been feeling like shit again and this is the last thing I need to read about when I am worried about how to stay alive and relatively pain free.
Will anyone out there care to read how I was a promiscuous one time gay beauty who flew through every state of the union spreading my love and the bug to all who lined up for their turn?
LOL This is the first time I have laughed in a week. So I guess this yet another one book did do something for me.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #18 on: February 26, 2014, 07:08:20 AM »
Here I am cruising through the forums only to come across my name on an answer I DID NOT POST!!!
I have not posted anything on this forum since asking about my now cancelled move to Texas in December(?) so I have no idea how or why this came up under my name?
Is it possible that my acct was hacked or someone else has the same name I do? What is going on here? I seriously did not advise anyone to stay away from a person who has been diagnosed with HPV!!!!!!
Seriously...I did not post the comment above and I am not too happy to see this fucked up message with my name on it.
You know, about 3-4+ years ago I had some SERIOUS issues with someone from this forum going onto other online forums posting some nasty ass things about me which prompted the administrators of AIDSMEDS to post the warning about privacy above. Now I have some idiotic jackass posting comments with misleading information and my name is on them? WTF? I did not post this comment...seriously!! Is there a way of removing the offensive comment as I did not post it? This is really pissing me off now...first I have to deal with people stalking me onto other forums now this shit?
What is up with this forum? I come on maybe once every four or five months usually not commenting just reading articles and topics of interest to me. Now I have some jackass handing out some f'ed up information that is not at all what I would advise a person to do.
I think I need to stay away from here and just read the magazine as this is getting to be too much!!
I apologize to the OP of this question for the idiotic advise that was given out under my screenname. I would never tell anyone to avoid another person for having HPV.
To any of the moderators here...could you please remove the above post as I did not post it?

We take security here on he forum very seriously so I immediately checked your account . There have been no unsuccessful login attempts or activity with your account except for the logins you have personally made and posted with . The post I quoted and the one in question have the same IP address in common that you have been using for a very long time . 

Online Miss Philicia

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #19 on: February 26, 2014, 08:43:58 AM »
buca, do you live with a better half that might have access somehow to your user name and password?
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline eric48

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #20 on: February 26, 2014, 09:01:55 AM »
Or he has a ... Virus   ;D
NVP/ABC/3TC/... UD; CD4 > 1000; CD4/CD8 ~ 2.0   safety stock : 3 months (2013: FOTO= 5d. ON 2d. OFF ; 2014: NCT02157311 = 4d. ON, 3d. OFF)

Offline Dan0

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #21 on: February 26, 2014, 09:29:54 AM »
...or if you stay logged in on this forum...anyone that is at your computer can access your favorites, open it up and it's all ready to go!  I learned that the hard way! 
You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches.

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Offline tednlou2

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #22 on: February 27, 2014, 12:53:40 AM »
Buca,

The writing style is similar, down to no paragraph breaks.  If there is an imposter, that would indicate someone who knows how you write.  The posts in this thread, in the thread about Sean Strub's book both lack the paragraph breaks as your posts about being hacked. 

And, since the IP address is the same, I would be looking at who at home has access to your computer.  I know mine keeps me logged into this site, unless I log out. 

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #23 on: February 27, 2014, 01:07:03 AM »
I muted buca's account so that we can look into the matter . I want to be fair to him so I muted the account so he will know it cant be used until then .

I'm certain it was not a hacked account .

Offline harleymc

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2014, 05:08:54 AM »
It's difficult to know exactly what the pro 'every gay guy should be tested for HPV' brigade think is going to happen with the results.

I'm a participant in the SPANC (Study of the Prevention  of Anal Cancer) that has been running for years in Australia. The results of the first few years shows that there is a high rate of remisions for cell anomolies caused by various strains of HPV. There is a very low per annum progression from the highest grade of non-cancerous anomolies to cancer, but the bulk of the anomolies either don't progress or heal themselves.

This study is showing that the best course of action for high grade anomolies is simply to wait and see, rather than have surgical intervention. Intervention is definatley warranted in the case of cancer being detected, but not before hand.

Offline pittman

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Re: Dating a guy with HPV
« Reply #25 on: March 13, 2014, 08:28:34 PM »
It's difficult to know exactly what the pro 'every gay guy should be tested for HPV' brigade think is going to happen with the results.

I'm a participant in the SPANC (Study of the Prevention  of Anal Cancer) that has been running for years in Australia. The results of the first few years shows that there is a high rate of remisions for cell anomolies caused by various strains of HPV. There is a very low per annum progression from the highest grade of non-cancerous anomolies to cancer, but the bulk of the anomolies either don't progress or heal themselves.

This study is showing that the best course of action for high grade anomolies is simply to wait and see, rather than have surgical intervention. Intervention is definatley warranted in the case of cancer being detected, but not before hand.

I never thought of it as merely testing for HPV. Once you have it, you have it.   I do believe in research and trying to apply rational, science based treatment.  As such, I would be happy to learn that the removal of even high grade anomalies is not critical.

Yet, that still does not imply on its own you should not be getting regular exams, rather that their purpose may shift to monitor for potential development of cancer.

 


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