HIV Prevention and Testing > Am I Infected?

Made a mistake!

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Hi everyone,

Just here for some advice.  Last weekend, I went to  bed with a guy I've known for about 5 or 6 years.  Haven't known him too well, but still do know him and have mutual friends etc.

First of, he claims he hasn't had sex in a year, and got tested and was negative (I asked him three times).  On the third time, he said "For the third and final time, I'm sweet".

Anyway, last Saturday night/early hours of Sunday morning we went to bed. Throughout the night we didn't do anything risky - no penetration, however he did push his penis against my anus.  He did look for a condom (can't remember if I told him to look for one, or if it was of his own accord). Anyway, here's the part the worries me:

I fell asleep for a short time (he said 10 mins max, but he didn't realise, he just thought I'd "gone quiet") but I woke up and he was still fingering me/thrusting penis against my anus.  I tensed to stop it from going in.  I later asked him if we fxxked and he said "no".

Eugh I'm just paranoid! I worry what if he penetrated me during the time I was asleep? We were supposed to go out tonight, but in the end I was too tired from work. We're going out on Monday night for a few drinks (I think he wants to get a bit more serious with me). 

His penis is extremely "fat" so I'm thinking if he had penetrated someone as tight as me (sorry for the graphic-ness) I would have surely had some sign the next morning? I'd like to emphasize he is very "thick".

Either way I'll get tested, but just keep freaking out :(

Thanks for your time :)

You would have known if he penetrated you when you were asleep.

Jeff G:
I really do think you would have known if you were penetrated so I a with you doubting that happened , nothing else you mention is a risk for HIV and I did read carefully .
 Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Although you do not need testing at this time for this incident , anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Thank-you Rapid Rod and Jeff for your responses, I appreciate it.

I understand what you're saying that I would have known if he penetrated me (I thought that too), but I felt throughout the night had I not tensed his penis would either have slightly penetrated - or penetrated completely.  It's worth noting I suppose that I've never had sex before (either gave or received), so I'm sure there would have been some sign had he been in.

Ah well, I'll get tested and see how it goes. Thanks once again for letting me vent :P


Believe me, if you've never had anal intercourse before, you'd certainly know about it the first time, tensed or not. You'd know.



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