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Author Topic: I need hope...  (Read 1541 times)

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Offline ocean_bird321

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I need hope...
« on: January 05, 2014, 08:47:00 AM »
Hi first of all i want to thank this website administration for such forum where people get right advice for the matters that they can not share with others. I have a strange story i hope administrator will help me and give me right advice. I am 28 years old man.I was talking to one girl (26 years old) on internet for few months and we decided to meet she has a 6 year old child also. When i meet that woman she was very weak and very sad. I just try to give her hope. I ask reason of her sadness she said she is heart broken her boyfriends left her and she look for true love.She said she is very alone i give her hope and i tell her i am there for her. We had sex also i was there with her 4 days and 5 nights. every night we had sex. she did not tell me she is HIV infected. but i feel she wanted my company because she is alone. we had safe sex with condoms. but i didn't know that she is hiv positive. second night during sex i had long sex session with her. since it was long sex she was dry in vagina and condom break and i was in her for 10 seconds. then i get new condom same night and it break after few seconds again and i was in her few seconds. then i get one more new condom and she said its very long we should stop now since was not ejaculate. i go toilet and i pee there and clean myself after sex. third night i lick her vagina accidentally and she stopped me in few second. fourth night again i lick her vagina and she stop me again.  these are the most scary events which are scaring me. Normally we sleep together we kiss sometimes. when i return back to my home she told me after one week that she is HIV positive. She is saying she didn't know this before but i feel she know it before too. And she was checking me if i would still like to be in love with her. But i am so scared for my own life. She is feeling bad too. She is giving me hope everyday. She is saying i must not be worried as condom break for few seconds two times. and licking for short time is also not so risky. she is giving me hope but i know i am still on very high risk. i meet her 22 December, 2013 till 27 December 2013 its more than a week and i am very scared. I want to know when should i do test and what are my chances. thanks and i will keep update this forum till test date.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: I need hope...
« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2014, 09:04:30 AM »
The risk for the insertive partner in lower and condom breaks with brief insertion rarely leads to HIV transmissions . The licking or cunnilingus was not a risk .

You did have a risk and will need to test at 6 weeks past any possible exposure and again at 3 months confirm the result . It was low risk but not no risk .

anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than HIV. Some of the other STDs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid HIV infection. It really is that simple!

Please read my condom links and educate yourself about condoms so that you can prevent condom failures . 
HIV 101 - Basics
HIV 101
You can read more about Transmission and Risks here:
HIV Transmission and Risks
You can read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
You can read more about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
You can read more about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
You can read more about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline ocean_bird321

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Re: I need hope...
« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2014, 09:13:01 AM »
thanks Jeff G, your reply gives me hope. Now all i have to wait to test my luck on test. but i have read this forum many say test can be done 3 weeks after exposure. I need some more help i am feeling weak and worried after this incident what kind of test should i do if i do after 3 weeks and when the results will come? and what kind of test i should do after 6 weeks and how long it will take to get results i live here in Sweden.

Offline Ann

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Re: I need hope...
« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2014, 09:23:54 AM »

but i have read this forum many say test can be done 3 weeks after exposure.


You may have read that from people asking questions here, but you haven't read it from any one of us who answer questions and know what we're talking about. You can take a test at three weeks, but all it will tell you is your hiv status six weeks previously.

As Jeff said, the earliest you should test is at six weeks. A negative result at that point must be confirmed at three months, but is highly unlikely to change.

In over thirteen years of answering questions on this forum, I have yet to see the insertive partner end up hiv positive following a condom break. I do not expect you will be the first, but you must test to be sure. You should be testing at least once a year anyway.

Don't forget to get tested for all the other, MUCH more easily transmitted STIs. You're more likely to end up with something like syphilis, chlamydia or gonorrhea following a condom break than you are hiv.

You only need standard hiv antibody testing, both at six weeks and at three months. Just ask the clinic for an hiv test - and don't forget to ask for a FULL panel of STI testing. (STI = sexually transmitted infection)

I can't tell you how long it takes to get results back in Sweden. I'm sure they have rapid tests available. You can find testing centers near you by using the searchable database at aidsmap.com

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ocean_bird321

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Re: I need hope...
« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2014, 10:37:49 AM »
thank you very much Ann. I will wait for six weeks and then do test. I hope it come negative as yours words are giving me hope as you say risk is low with condom break. Thank you and may God bless you.


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