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kiki06:
Good Evening,

The last couple of days have been days of soul searching and yesterday after a visit with my counselor I was "led" to your website. After looking around I think I may have found a place to start my journey in finally becoming comfortable with who I am...

So who am I? I'm a 30 year old heterosexual mother. I'm recently single and this status change has made me re-evaluate many aspects of my life including "how I deal with my HIV status". So here's who I am in a nutshell...

I was infected as the result of a rape when I was 18, he was an older man actually a friend of the family. I never reported the rape because I'd felt ashamed that I'd agreed to go on a date with such an older man and should have known better.  I dealt with my rape on my own terms, I didn't date anymore and put all my time and energy into my family, my friends, my job, and my schoolwork. Now fast forward two years later to Christmas Eve, my friend and I were going to dinner and on our way home we were in a car accident. As a result of the car accident turns out I needed surgery several months later...

The day before my surgery my orthopedic doctor called and said I was HIV+ (Over the phone to a 20 year old girl at home by herself). The next couple of weeks were really a blur, I dealt with it, met my doctor and just kind of went on with life.

I've had several relationships over the years and in 2000 I met a wonderful man and together we had a son (both are HIV NEGATIVE) thankfully I had an easy pregnancy because the medications took a toll on me. Now here we are 6 years later and we've been split up a year and my son is the light of my life I literally live and breathe my son.

It's been 12 years since I became infected and 10 years since my diagnosis, my numbers are still wonderful and I'm not on any medication. STILL everyday I live with my "secret" I still hide my status for fear of how it would affect my son (kids can be cruel) my friends and family know. I more recently have been having the  need to talk to others who have been where I am or kind of understand, I hope maybe just maybe I have found that place?

I'm also VERY interested in starting something for heterosexual women infected with HIV out here on the net, there are so few places and I know there is a need.

I can't wait to "meet" you all.

"kiki"

Teresa:
Welcome to the forum. There are a great bunch of people here. You have come to the right place.
My name is Teresa and my hubby found out may 5th that he is HIV+. So we are new to all this. The people here have been a real godsend to me as im sure they will be to you.

Again Welcome
Teresa

allopathicholistic:

--- Quote from: kiki06 on June 06, 2006, 10:47:09 PM ---STILL everyday I live with my "secret" I still hide my status for fear of how it would affect my son (kids can be cruel) my friends and family know. I more recently have been having the  need to talk to others who have been where I am or kind of understand,
--- End quote ---

Hi kiki, nice to meet you. I hope one day the truth comes out about what happened to you - the truth will set you free. For me the weight of my secret was killing me surely but slowly - when all the truths came out to my family it was such a relief I can't even describe it ... My family wondered why on earth  would i hold that much inside

AlanBama:
Hello Kiki, and welcome!

Glad you found us.   

Alan

OzPaul:
Welcome Kiki  !!!!

Thank you for sharing your story. I think that you will find a most welcoming family here at AM. All sorts of folks from many places around the globe.
As to your hope that there are other heterosexual women here who are poz as well, rest assured we have a glorious group of passsionate and dedicated women. They will welcome you with open hearts and arms as will your brothers here.
I'm looking forward to hearing more from you.

Cheers
Paul

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