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Author Topic: confused and hurt  (Read 3088 times)

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Offline terrifiedinside44

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  • Posts: 7
confused and hurt
« on: November 10, 2013, 09:23:13 PM »
Was told Thursday I am presumptive positive. I will find out this Thursday if I am actually positive. I don't know what that means! I am so conflicted inside. I just want to crawl in a hole. I was given no information at all. The doctor called and told me to come in right away and dropped this bomb and then said sit tight till next week and to create a list of all sexual partners since my last test and she gave me the date. Its a very short list so that's good.  :'( I am so scared  What is life going to be? I have so many emotions. I know everyone here has been where I am so please help me.

Offline mecch

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  • Posts: 11,444
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2013, 02:12:38 AM »
Well thats a horrible waiting time.  Why did they discover you are HIV+?  Did you have blood drawn and did you ask for an HIV test? 
Now you must wait last Thursday to NEXT week??? As in 13+ days??  Not kind at all.

Listen if you are HIV+ it will be a change in your life but it's not the end of the world. You will be able to learn a lot from this FORUM, from other HIV+ people, and from heath professionals who will be more informative than this present doctor who thinks its fine to leave you sitting in the dark about such an important issue. 

Why don't you call back and find out what blood test exactly showed you are HIV+, and get more details on what confirmation test is being done, and how long its going to take. Can you at least get an appointment already in his/her book to talk face to face???
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Theyer

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  • Posts: 2,496
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2013, 07:00:32 AM »
What insensitive , cruel behaviour . Mecch has clearly laid out the important stuff so I will not repeat them.
I do feel very angry that anybody thinks this is a humane way off providing health care though.
How are you physically ?
How far is the clinic from where you live?
Big hugs
m
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline tednlou2

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,815
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #3 on: November 11, 2013, 01:42:34 PM »
Well thats a horrible waiting time.  Why did they discover you are HIV+?  Did you have blood drawn and did you ask for an HIV test? 
Now you must wait last Thursday to NEXT week??? As in 13+ days??  Not kind at all.

I read that as a one-week wait period.  It seems the OP said told last Thursday, wrote this yesterday on Sunday, and will get the confirmation this coming Thursday.  How long is normal for a western blot? 

I, too, am curious what test was done for the doc to ring the alarm.  I think docs should always say there can be errors in these initial tests.  It would be nice to just run the confirmation test and then tell the patient.  Of course, that would be keeping valuable info from the patient and they could possibly infect someone in the meantime. 



Offline mecch

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  • Posts: 11,444
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2013, 02:31:47 PM »
Yeah my bad math.
Anyhoo, courage to you, its awful waiting for such news...
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline terrifiedinside44

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #5 on: November 11, 2013, 04:24:09 PM »
Yes is just 7 days. This clinic is a few minutes away from me. They ran a battery of tests on me because I have been ill for about a year. Lost tons of weight for no reason. Random gastric problems. When I went for my yearly pap I just asked for a full screening of everything because I just thought it would be a good idea. I will only have a list of 3 people that will need notified so that is good I guess. I feel dirty and cheap and sick. I know I shouldn't but I do. There should not be a stigma attached to HIV anymore but I am educated enough to know there is. Everyday seems like an eternity and deep inside I have a feeling it will be the real deal. Over the past year I have had a lot of health issues. The clinic that did the tests was the VA. I am so scared inside. I keep asking myself how stupid can I be? I do feel this was so cruel no one has called since that day I was given no recourses... The doctor didn't even bother to take the time to contact my VA therapist  In my opinion she handled in a really unprofessional cruel manner  My best friend is the only one that knows and she is being really supportive 

Offline terrifiedinside44

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #6 on: November 11, 2013, 04:32:52 PM »
By the way thank you for responding. It helps a lot have people to talk to.

Offline JH3310

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #7 on: November 11, 2013, 04:45:58 PM »
Hi,

I got diagnosed last tuesday. Like you, I was scared and had all kinds of emotions going through my head. Today was my first visit with the doctor and I had the opportunity of asking him questions. This process really calmed me down and I feel a little better now. I hope that you can meet with your doctor soon and you have the chance of asking questions.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               

Offline alexjones

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #8 on: November 11, 2013, 06:17:50 PM »
Hi. Sorry you had to come here...but it's great that you made it here to this community. Everyone is great and they'll help you to soon realize that everything will be o.k.

I would like to ask, if you don't mind, are you active duty or reserve military? You mentioned the VA...I'm just asking because there's a story on the front page of poz concerning positive servicemembers.

I wish you the best going forward.  Remember to breathe! You'll be just fine in this day and age!

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,444
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #9 on: November 11, 2013, 06:38:50 PM »
Yes is just 7 days. This clinic is a few minutes away from me. They ran a battery of tests on me because I have been ill for about a year. Lost tons of weight for no reason. Random gastric problems. When I went for my yearly pap I just asked for a full screening of everything because I just thought it would be a good idea. I will only have a list of 3 people that will need notified so that is good I guess. I feel dirty and cheap and sick. I know I shouldn't but I do. There should not be a stigma attached to HIV anymore but I am educated enough to know there is. Everyday seems like an eternity and deep inside I have a feeling it will be the real deal. Over the past year I have had a lot of health issues. The clinic that did the tests was the VA. I am so scared inside. I keep asking myself how stupid can I be? I do feel this was so cruel no one has called since that day I was given no recourses... The doctor didn't even bother to take the time to contact my VA therapist  In my opinion she handled in a really unprofessional cruel manner  My best friend is the only one that knows and she is being really supportive

Well if you are HIV positive one silver lining is that it will be identified and the last year of bad health won't continue. I know its a bit of a perverse way of thinking, but if your health is really shot, then diagnosis and treatment is going to vastly improve your health.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline 2tcells

  • Member
  • Posts: 81
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #10 on: November 11, 2013, 08:41:55 PM »
They did the same to me basically you tested poz on the test thats 99.9 % accurate so they have to make sure your not the 1 in 100000 that is negative and tested poz to cover there ass. So just start dealing with being poz would be my advice.  Like someone else said the good news is they can now treat you and you will soon be rid of all your health problems you have been having for a year. Being poz isnt that bad you will be feeling better than you have in along time once u get on some meds
7-4-13 diagnosed cd4- 2      vl-220,600
8-3-13                     cd4- 4      vl- 448
9-3-13                     cd4- 40    vl- ud
11-3-13                   cd4- 54    vl-ud
1-9-14                     cd4- 62    vl- 43
4-3-14                     cd4- 110  vl-ud yay!
8-5-14                     cd4- 95    vl-ud boo

Offline terrifiedinside44

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #11 on: November 11, 2013, 10:15:42 PM »
I am a vet. I am out of the military. I have been looking at the resources available around here and there isn't crap. I live in a remote area so I am going to have to seek support in a larger city which means two hours or more away :( bummer  So you guys are going to have to put up with me lol 
The past year I lost a lot of weight out of no where and have been tired and just not myself. I also had a lot of nausea.  I guess I know why now. I keep beating the crap out of myself which is so stupid  I see my therapist tomorrow so hopefully that helps

Offline Theyer

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,496
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #12 on: November 12, 2013, 10:43:05 AM »
Well I for one will be delighted to read your posts , and am very pleased your getting to see someone to talk to. Please please remember its a virus not a moral judgement , and those who make it a moral judgemental keep them lonely don,t join them it fact give them a good verbel blast . As Mecch pointed out , it looks likly that this is the start of you regaining your health .
All the Best
m
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline terrifiedinside44

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #13 on: November 24, 2013, 11:02:46 PM »
Sorry for the delay I had an overseas trip planned and they did not have my results before I left. In fact it took 14 days to get them back. I am relieved to say my Western Blot was negative. I am very confused as to how my Elisa was positive. I know they have ways of finding out otherwise there would be no statistics on what causes false positives. I will say after all of the research I have done and meeting those of you that posted here I have a whole new outlook on HIV. By the time I was given the results I pretty much had accepted the diagnosis because It is almost impossible for this to happen as the Elisa is now designed to work around many of the things that caused false positives years ago. They want me back at three and six months to test again to be safe.

Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #14 on: November 24, 2013, 11:05:49 PM »
Your western blot is conclusive provided you didn't have a risk in the past 3 months so no need to test again over this incident . Glad you are negative , good for you !
« Last Edit: November 24, 2013, 11:08:31 PM by Jeff G »

Offline Loser1988

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  • Member
  • Posts: 18
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #15 on: November 25, 2013, 01:16:51 AM »
I shouldn't be posting here but just dropped in to say a hi as your situation is same as mine. I know how you would have felt during the period you were told positive. I was also in a similar situation as that of yours. Mine is a little worse. I was diagnosed poz in Elisa and western blot. I was on Meds for 1 month. But my results were questioned in this forum as I didn't have a risk in the hiv exposure that I claimed as the only possible route. I was declared neg after a retest done after 1 month of medication. In my case, the reason for false positive was identified to be mislabelled blood sample. It was such a relief hearing neg result but what i lost was my relationship with my wife. Looking at the people in this forum I think living with hiv is not too bad to be worried sick. Cheers!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #16 on: November 25, 2013, 08:34:49 AM »

It is almost impossible for this to happen as the Elisa is now designed to work around many of the things that caused false positives years ago.


Not strictly true.

Pregnancy (could you be pregnant?) and (possibly as-of-yet undiagnosed) autoimmune conditions can cause them, and sometimes they just happen. Even with the newer tests. This is why we always caution people that a positive ELISA MUST be confirmed with a positive Western Blot.

Sometimes a recent vaccination can cause them too - did you have any vaccines in preparation for your "overseas trip"?


They want me back at three and six months to test again to be safe.


You only need to test at three months past your last incident of unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse with someone of unknown hiv status. If you've already tested at three months past any unprotected intercourse, then you are conclusively hiv negative.

If you've tested negative at six weeks or more since the last incident of unprotected intercourse, your negative result is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

The six month testing window is years out of date. The window has been three months for quite some time now.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline terrifiedinside44

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: confused and hurt
« Reply #17 on: November 25, 2013, 09:29:54 PM »
I am not pregnant and well Veterans Affairs is pretty behind on some things which is probably why they said 3 and 6 months. I didn't need any vaccinations as all of mine are up to date from the military, I did get a flu shot in October. I have not been in any position to put me a risk in the past three months so I feel little better. Everyone's support means so much to me!!! I have a sinking feeling it may be someone else's test. They mixed my record up with another vet twice in the past year. I went this morning and had blood work at a regular doctor just in case.

 


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