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Author Topic: Risk Assessment Please Read  (Read 779 times)

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Offline Cameron1011

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Risk Assessment Please Read
« on: November 04, 2013, 03:39:46 PM »
Hey so about two 1/2 weeks ago I experienced my first ever hookup. I knew I didn't want to do it nor enjoy it, but I gave into my curiosity, and convinced myself it would be good to do it so I can finally have resolution that it's not what I really want to do when I am horny.

Anyways, the guy came over and he said he was tested negative before. Although I haven't been tested, I am pretty sure I am negative too. The only person I've had sex with before him was my boyfriend which was years and years ago. And since then he has tested negative on many many accounts after sleeping with other people. I know it's not a conclusive way to  be sure, but I still don't believe I got anything from him.

So with the guy I hooked up with, I gave oral, and he gave oral. He came afterwards and some got in my mouth. We then had protective sex, me being receptive, in which he came, and the condom was still intact after pulling out. After throwing out the condom, I gave him oral again. Then we had unprotected sex, me being receptive again, which lasted at max 3 mins, and he pulled out and then came on my back. However, this time the cum was very little, and pretty much looked completely clear.

Afterwards I asked him further about his sexual history. And he said the reason why he got tested was because he slept with his then ex-boyfriend who was sleeping with a guy who most likely was hiv positive. Again he said he tested negative after this, but since then he said he's hooked up with quite a bit of partners afterwards. He took the test in like March.  He says he had no reason to further test because he engaged in safe sex after his initial test result. But that really concerned me.

However, I am very concerned, because he never took  a follow up test, and he never told me how soon after he and his ex boyfriend had sex he took a test. I am afraid he may have took it too soon, but he did say his father was like a nurse and told him all about testing and his risk, so I guess he may have tested appropriately.

I am just paranoid, because I never knew him prior to hooking up.

 I know people here say oral is essentially safe, but it still scares me. And then we still had unprotected anal. Although I wasn't bleeding or anything afterwards, I've had a history of some blood or tissue being in my stool. I didn't have any blood or tissue  in my stool prior before the hook up, nor after, but I feel like that would up my risk.

But anyways I tried to get PEP afterwards, because he said his ex boyfriend also did heavy drugs, but in short, I didn't do it.

So I was wondering was I at very high risk? Do you think I could have possibly got infected.

I plan on testing in 3 months, but I was wondering can I test with the OraQuick 3-4 weeks after exposure, if so how accurate would that test be. I read most people produce enough antibodies in 25 days.

I just want to get tested as soon as possible because I'm a hypochondriac and my anxiety is killing me over here.

I really regret doing what I did, and never ever want to do it again, safe or unsafe. And I'm near the verge of tears sometimes, cause I really feel like I just completely effed up my life, although I know HIV isn't a death sentence. I'm only 20 and this would just really destroy my state of mind, and agh :/

Offline Joe K

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2013, 03:58:58 PM »
You did have a risk with the unprotected sex and you can test at 6 weeks after your latest exposure and again after three months to confirm the results.  What someone tells you about their sexual or testing history is essentially unreliable, as only testing will confirm your status.  You need to be using condoms, consistently for penetrative sex.

Oral sex is not a risk for HIV infection, for a number of reasons.  HIV is a very fragile virus and once it is exposed to air it is unable to infect.  Also, saliva contains numerous proteins and enzymes that render HIV unable to infect as well.

The risk factors for HIV are ...

Sharing IV drug needles immediately after use.
Unprotected anal and vaginal sex.
Mother to child during or shortly after birth
Very specific healthcare situations.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to HIV testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start.  As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine HIV tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than HIV.  Some of the other STDs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid HIV infection. It really is that simple!

Joe

Offline Cameron1011

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #2 on: November 04, 2013, 04:19:46 PM »
Thank you for replying.

So having an OraQuick test at 3-4 weeks would be useless? Or could a result be somewhat accurate?

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #3 on: November 04, 2013, 04:23:09 PM »
Well, you seem to have answered your own questions as you wrote them, and correctly assumed what we were going to say.

I don't see anything risky in terms of HIV in what you did. Using a condom for penetrative sex was exactly what you needed to do in order to protect yourself against HIV. Condoms also provided a terrific barrier for other STDs as well, but they seem to protect BEST against HIV. Other bugs like gonorrhea and chlamydia and syphilis can, of course, be passed through oral sex.

One thing that seems to have agitated you is your in-depth discussion of your partner's status. You realize how unproductive such discussions are on a whole lot of levels, right?

On the deepest level, you are asking someone you essentially know nothing about and have no real expectation of privacy with to tell you what could possibly be stigmatizing information. This is a level of personal vulnerability that, in a bizarre way, is even more intimate than the sex you are going to have or have just finished having.

You are also presupposing your partner is honest, or even knows his status. Evidence is pointing to an alarming percentage of new infections passed on by the recently infected, whose viral load levels are usually sky high - and who might not test positive yet on HIV antibody tests.

Ironically, had your partner said that he was indeed HIV positive but under successful treatment with an undetectable viral load, you would have been the absolute safest in the scenario you described. But something tells me that this is the sort of revelation that would end your evening.

I ask you to reflect upon that, and what it means for your own health and safety, as well as that of others and the community as a whole.

It seems tome that this reflects your own fear of HIV, which might be warring with your intellectual understanding of the disease, it's transmission, and the state of treatment today. If you have the time for it, I urge you to read not only our LESSONS on transmission but also about HIV in general. It is not the boogey man nor death sentence that it was twenty or thirty years ago. And whether or not you continue to hook up with people for sex, you will do yourself a great favor by acquainting yourself with HIV as it exists in 2013.

At any rate, congrats on both of you for using condoms for your penetrative sex. That is what you need to do in order to avoid HIV.

Also, of course, as a sexually active person who is not currently in a mutually monogamous relationship, I urge you to get a complete STD screening at least twice a year. Inclusing, of course, an HIV test.



"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2013, 07:56:08 AM »
Cameron,

You only did "the right thing", as Jonathan said, the first time you had anal intercourse with this guy.

You engaged in the highest level of sexual risk for hiv (unprotected receptive anal intercourse) the second time you had intercourse with this guy, when you did NOT use a condom.

As Jonathan (correctly) said, you CANNOT go by what a person tells you about their sexual health. You need to use a condom each and every time until such time as you are in a mutually monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs TOGETHER.

Don't test before six weeks. This is the earliest you should test for any real peace of mind.

The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks. A six week negative is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed by at the three month point.

You seriously need to wise up and stop putting yourself at risk for hiv. Hopefully you'll come out of it ok this time, but next time you may not be so lucky. Only testing - and confirming any negative result - at the appropriate time will tell you how your luck fared this time.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and CONSISTENTLY, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2013, 10:37:26 AM »
Thank you for pointing out that the subsequent intercourse sessions were without condoms. I had read that differently.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Cameron1011

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2013, 04:15:56 PM »
Thank you for the input guys! I really do appreciate it.

I know it was completely stupid. I knew it before hand, but still went through with it. And as soon as we were done, I started freaking out in my head. I just to need to learn how to control my hormones and listen to my gut when it says I am about to do something I shouldn't. :/.

And I never trusted him with his status, which is why I tried to get PEP. ahh

And sorry to seem offensive with my original post. I totally know HIV is not a death sentence, but if I were to have HIV, it would change/delay my current career plans because of the finances of medication, and the whole idea of having to take medication daily at certain times, would personally make me feel so chained up, not free ya know. Again no offense. And then my family would probably not trust me anymore nor have faith in my decisions, because I'm usually the one in the family who is completely, and sometimes overly cautious and prepared. And indulging in this incident goes against my whole entire nature.

And I can promise myself I am not hooking up ever again. Even if I did it completely safe, having this experience made me realize I only want to have sex with someone I truly trust and love.

This was definitely a huge learning lesson for me, and I just pray and hope I don't have to pay a big price for it.

I know this is my last post, but I just need one more questioned answered. I plan on taking a completely comprehensive test for all stds, and I was wondering if I decide to get both the HIV 1 and HIV 2 test, at 4-6 weeks, could that be seen as a definite answer. Wouldn't testing negative on both in this time frame be conclusive, since one tests for antibodies and the other tests for viral load? I think one is the Rapid test, and the other is the RNA I believe... and if I'm correct if I test negative on the rapid test, it means I have either very little or no antibodies, and if I then test negative on the RNA it means my viral load would be under 50 or non existent?

And if that time frame is not a good time to do both tests, when is the earliest I can get both to be completely conclusive. And when's the earliest I can test for all the other stds?

I know just having the rapid test after 3 months would be conclusive, but I just really want to get tested as soon as possible, because I am finding very difficult to ease my mind and therefor difficult to do anything productive. And I don't want to waste anymore time being unproductive. The wait is killing me so much.

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk Assessment Please Read
« Reply #7 on: November 06, 2013, 09:05:44 AM »

I plan on taking a completely comprehensive test for all stds, and I was wondering if I decide to get both the HIV 1 and HIV 2 test, at 4-6 weeks, could that be seen as a definite answer. Wouldn't testing negative on both in this time frame be conclusive, since one tests for antibodies and the other tests for viral load? I think one is the Rapid test, and the other is the RNA I believe... and if I'm correct if I test negative on the rapid test, it means I have either very little or no antibodies, and if I then test negative on the RNA it means my viral load would be under 50 or non existent?


Cameron,

Whether you like it or not, there simply are NO short-cuts to hiv testing.

PCR RNA tests are a waste of money. Regardless of the result, positive or negative, that result must STILL be confirmed with antibody testing.

What you need to do is to have an hiv antibody test - a rapid test is fine - at six weeks. Provided this result is negative, you will have to wait until the three month point to confirm that result.

An hiv 1&2 test tests for the two types of hiv. Hiv 2 is rare in the US. Fourth generation hiv 1&2 tests also tests for the p24 antigen, which is only present in the first few weeks of infection. Once enough antibodies are created to produce a positive result, the p24 disappears.

There may be a time period of a few days where enough antibodies have NOT yet been produced to trigger a positive antibody result, but enough have been produced to stop the production of the p24 antigen. Therefore, a positive or a negative p24 antigen result must be confirmed with further antibody testing.

Again, there are no short-cuts to hiv testing. ANY result must always be confirmed with further testing - a Western Blot test in the case of a positive antibody result, and further antibody testing at the three month point for a negative antibody result. A negative antibody result at three months is conclusive.


The wait is killing me so much.


Sorry, but the cliché "if you do the crime, be prepared to do the time" comes to mind. Hopefully you'll come out of this experience hiv negative and you won't put yourself through this again.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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