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Author Topic: Depressed and scared...  (Read 1836 times)

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Offline gl102529

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Depressed and scared...
« on: October 06, 2013, 06:15:53 PM »
It all started when I was about 17 and he was about 14 and we were messing around every 6 months. We grew up together, a family friend, and experimented alot as kids with dry humping. The first time we finally experiemented unprotected however it was only a few seconds b4 we felt it was wrong and quickly stopped. but later on in our years, we had seemed to get over our uncomfortableness and had started again. but then it started to become a few strokes and a pull out and it was done. We never got past 1 minute of sex. But the last time a few years ago, we had one last one which ended in about 3 minutes. So now, 5 years later, I discovered I was cursed with gnorrhea/chlamydia which was so embarassing and bc i thought he'd be honest in telling me he had a std which he denied he had. I didnt know for 5 whole yrs I had it and I only found out by having severe back pains and going to the E.R.

I didnt know he had a reputation of being sexually active and now I am so scared and worried that I have HIV. I have never had severe symptoms. I was sick once in the last 5 years which I quickly got over. It wasnt long, only like 3 days since I get over colds fast.

I know I need to get tested to know but I dont want to know at the same time.

I have a boyfriend now and we have never had any vaginal/anus sex but I have given him oral sex a few times and we kiss alot. I have literally cried so much and have diagnosed myself through the internet almost everyday yet it's so hard to gain the courage to go and get tested. This post is more so for comfort than really asking if Im infected because I feel so alone and lonely and it's so scary because I deal with many other medical issues and as a kid we do so many dumb things and dont realize how things can affect us long term.

Im sorry if this is long. I just really wanted comfort..

Offline Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Depressed and scared...
« Reply #1 on: October 06, 2013, 06:31:55 PM »
You said it yourself , you must test . The best I can offer is that all the fear and uncertainty will go away as soon as you test .

You can test 6 weeks past any possible exposure and again at 3 months to confirm the result . If its been 3 months since your last unprotected sex you can test right away for a conclusive result and end this right now . 

Untreated HIV is far worse than your fear of testing , trust me and go get tested . Best of luck .

Offline gl102529

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Re: Depressed and scared...
« Reply #2 on: October 06, 2013, 06:43:48 PM »
Yes. I know. Thank you for your reply.

Even if I am infected, would my boyfriend be infected with the few times I've given him oral?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Depressed and scared...
« Reply #3 on: October 06, 2013, 06:49:21 PM »
No, HIV is sexually transmitted only through unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Other STDs are easier to acquire as you have unhappily found out. But your having other STDs does no by any means indicate any certainty that you are HIV positive.

You're doing the best thing for your healthy by getting tested. You can get an accurate result by testing now because if I am reading you correctly it's a long time since you have had anal sex.

We're keeping our fingers crossed for you and will be waiting to hear about your result.

Best of luck to you.
Andy Velez

Offline gl102529

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Is there a high risk?
« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2014, 01:44:37 PM »
I am a female and had unprotected sex. However, we did not really have ongoing sex. He thrust only a few times, I wiggled around on it for a few seconds, he was not deep and he pulled out.
However, I did catch gnor/chlamy but did not know and was tested only for a yeast infection and was given meds for a yeast infection. Later, I had the same partner again and he repeated, only, he again thrust only like 4 times, not deep at all and pulled out. Both of these times it was decided not to have ongoing sex. I only later found out I had the STD because i had horrible pain on my left side and was treated immediately.

Now Im extremely worried I have contracted HIV. I have tested and am waiting for the results. I just want to know how high of a risk I have of having HIV.

I also have a boyfriend now from that former exp. Am I at risk of giving him HIV if I give him blowjobs? I do not have any mouth sores or mouth diseases. Also, is he at risk if he gets an unknown cut and he fingers me? Me and my boyfriend do not have vaginal or anal sex right now. But we will use protection.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Depressed and scared...
« Reply #5 on: January 14, 2014, 01:54:18 PM »
Please only post in this one thread no matter how long its been or subject matter . You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here . Thanks .

You can test 6 weeks past any possible exposure and again at 3 months to confirm the results .

Giving your BF a blow job is not a risk for HIV but you should wait until you have tested negative for all STDS before you engage in any sexual activity again .

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!


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