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Author Topic: Chances are?  (Read 5651 times)

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Offline SychoWorried

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Chances are?
« on: May 02, 2007, 11:17:26 AM »
Hello All,

Since this forum is for the HIV Infection and since I am a person that worries too much, someone might be able to help me relax a little bit.

I had a protected sex with a new female that I knew for 3 weeks (heterosexual intercourse), during intercourse the condom broke, for about 15 seconds I felt that, removed it, cleaned my self with a piece of cloth and reused another condom. I am not worried sick about this encounter. It is been about 5 weeks now. Yesterday I had a sever diarrhea after a hectic drinking night. Today I am a little better. I have heard a lot that male-femal sex is more secure than homosexual sex. I have also read a lot about HIV symptoms.

My question is: when somebody says fever (is it a 37.5 fever? or a 40 degrees fever? )
                      when somebody says sorethroat (it is something not to be mistaken)
I am doing self diagnosis about 20 times per day, checking if there is any swollen glands, or any white spots in my tongue.

I felt that my tongue has like a white stuff on it, but i used to have this before and I guess it is related to my smoking.
I am feeling my neck and arms to see if I have some swollen things, but nothing.

Can you give me some info?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2007, 12:15:20 PM »
First off, do yourself a big favor and stop surfing the net for HIV information and stop feeling your body parts. By squeezing and prodding you can create a problem where none exists.

HIV is not an easy virus to transmit. It is significantly harder to accomplish from female to male. The condom that broke protected you until it broke. You were quick enough to change and put another one on. Given what you have described I would the risk for transmission IF the woman was HIV+ was extremely low to nil.

If for your peace of mind you feel you want to get tested at 13 weeks then go ahead do so. I certainly expect you will collect a negative result. In general it's good for anyone who's sexually active to regularly have a full STD panel done -- at least annually and every six months is even better.

I don't see this as an HIV situation.

Cheers, 
Andy Velez

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2007, 12:57:59 PM »
Try 39-40C

Offline jblove

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2007, 02:59:12 PM »
Stop beating yourself up. First of all, it is much more likely that a receptive partner in intercourse would get infected than the inserting partner.

Are you sure the condom broke? If it did, what did you (or your partner) do to make it break? Did you put it on right side out? Did you squeeze the reservoir tip as you were rolling it down your penis? What kind of lubrication did you use? I hope you used a water-based lubricant such as KY lubricant. If you used any time of oil based lube such as hand or body lotion or vaseline, etc.

Condoms will break if used incorrectly, but their breakage is very rare if used correctly. If you need to, buy the snugger fit condom or the Magnum condom.

If you are unsure about having the correct lubricant available, then I would advise you to use polyurethane condoms as you can use either type of lubricant. As a side bonus, they are both thinner (more sensitivity) and stronger.

I have been absent from the forum for a while, but had to put my two cents in. I have been HIV+ since 1984 and have had an AIDS diagnosis since 200. My latest numbers read CD4 count 341 and non-detectable viral load.

I am an HIV+ educator for the Northwest and help people all the time understand their situation and possible risk factors.

I hope I relieved some of your worry on this topic.



jblove


Offline SychoWorried

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2007, 04:45:36 PM »
Hello and thank you all for your replies.

I forgot to mention that the girl tested HIV negative the next day and she was ok to do the test. However I am an expat in Angola so I might not be sure about the test and it was done in a fast 25 minutes.

For the condom, it broke because I used it wrongly since she and I was drunk, and also i was not handling it correctly. My lesson of this is to be always careful about such a thing, and not to drink too much.

I congratulate you jblove on your courage, to be able to live with such a disease and have the willingness to teach about it is great.
I do not know what will I do if I catch it, probably suicide in a matter of 2 weeks. I hope that you live for a longuer time.

I also congratulate on this website, since not too many people are brave to speak about the subject and we are missing too much to be able to open up our mind and fight this correctly.



Offline SychoWorried

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Seroconversion in reality
« Reply #5 on: May 04, 2007, 11:02:31 AM »
Hello All,

Well I am reading lots of threads around here and I am thankfull for the job your are doing in encouraging people and teaching them.

If it is not a big thing to ask, can you tell us what actually happened with you on seroconvertion?
We all have read that lots of symptoms does not show up or show up in part.

For example for me I had no fever, no swollen glands, no rash, no joint pain, no feeling tired, no vision problem, no sore throat, no night sweet, no white spots on tongue, but all that is as fas as I know (I might be having those without noticing although I checked for that couple of times). I am a fat guy so maybe my swollen glands won't show up for example ... I might be thankfull for all that but I cannot know if I had those symptoms or no. for example for the past couple of days I am feeling a bit hot, no fever I guess but might be something.

So can anybody tell me what actually happened with him in time of seroconversion.
 
I am like lots of people over here, had the risk when I am totally drunk. So lesson learned --> no heavy drinking any more.
I had the risk of broken condom, so another lesson learned, it is not just using a condom but using it correctly.

You have been assuring all these people, giving them something to hang on for at least the result of the test. You are great for what you are doing. How can I pay back? Is there something I can do for you? Maybe after my 13th week (in 8 weeks from now) I might be posting in the "I just tested Poz", I hope not but this is a possiblity. I am in an african country so all of the tests you mentioned are just not available over here. When I will be back to my country I will have the HIV 1, 2 and antibody tests, also I will have my CD4 count.
I will also talk to an HIV doc about what possible tests are available to be sure. meanwhile I will keep my self busy.
But just for knowledge can you answer my question about the seroconversion

Thank you All !!

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Seroconversion in reality
« Reply #6 on: May 04, 2007, 11:56:09 AM »
First of all you need to keep all your thoughts in your original post.

Second of all, each person will vary GREATLY in their seroconversion experience, and I dont think they all need to be posted here.  I for one had what I thought was the flu, that was it.  Rod had ZERO symptoms.  So you see, it means nothing in the end.  Only a test taken at the appropriate time will tell you your status.

You can pay us back by educating YOURSELF. 


In addition, in your specific incident the odds are heavily in your favor.  You were protected for the majority of the time, while it is true it only takes once, it is difficult to transmit HIV from female to male in the first place and even more so when your exposure was so brief.  I fully expect you to test negative over this incident.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2007, 11:59:35 AM by ACinKC »
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline SychoWorried

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Re: Seroconversion in reality
« Reply #7 on: May 04, 2007, 12:16:41 PM »
Sorry about the second thread, I didn't knew the rules before now.

For the Education, I did educate my self and from now on I will never have sex when I am drunk. I educated my self about condom usage also.

For the encounter, hopefully I will show up negative. Also I am not circumcised so I will get the operation.

Thank you all.

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Seroconversion in reality
« Reply #8 on: May 04, 2007, 12:38:28 PM »
WHOA TIGER!!!!

You dont need to start hackin away at Big Jim and the Twins!  Just use a condom.  Its really a much easier procedure than snippin off the tip of your johnson like a cuban cigar!

Condoms.  THEY WORK.
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #9 on: May 04, 2007, 04:35:06 PM »
I've merged your threads here so as AC said, please keep all of your comments in this same thread. It helps readers to follow the continuity of the exchanges.

I also agree with AC about your unnecessary rush to circumcision. As long as you consistently use condoms for intercourse you can leave your johnson alone. Condoms do a very effective job of protecting you. The thing is to use one everytime you have intercourse. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Andy Velez

Offline SychoWorried

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #10 on: May 06, 2007, 02:36:04 PM »
Hello All,

I am having a mild diarrhea, with a tired feeling. No fever, No headache. Could that be as HIV symptoms?
this is only this day. I know symptoms are not reliable but should these symptoms be associated together to be counted. I mean that should somebody have fever + diarrhea + joint and muscles aches + headache together or what ?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #11 on: May 06, 2007, 02:37:47 PM »
Since HIV has no specific symptoms, we don't discuss them in this forum. You can not diagnose HIV by symptoms.

Offline SychoWorried

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #12 on: May 08, 2007, 03:56:55 PM »
Hey,

Well your dose of good news is over now and I am feeling as worried as I was before. Tomorrow I will be on my 5th week so I have to wait an extra 8 weeks to be able to get a descent test. How long, somebody would think 8 weeks is just nothing to mention.

Now I know you will not discuss the symptoms even if you're stretched to the maximum and I do not think I am having these symptoms (other than a tingling tongue, but I guess this is because of my smoking).

Now beside the optimistics responds I got, I want to have an honnest respond on assessing the risk of my encounter. You always say this is a website to assess the risk of HIV transmission and lots of your responds seem pretty much the same. "HIV is not an easy virus to transmit ..."

I will list my encounter again: Misuse of the condom in heterosexual vaginal intercourse broke it, for about 10 seconds (as I recall) I removed it and changed it after cleaning my self a little bit and that's it, since then I haven't had sex anymore; I also said no when two beautiful girls wanted to have threesome with me :'(, damn this bloody virus. I guess I lost my trust in condoms.

Please can anyone respond to my questions. Please be as honnest as you can.
A last thing, I had the encounter in Africa, the girl tested HIV - the next day, If she hadn't had any encounter for the last 3 months, m free. Otherwise m in risk.

Another thing, although it is too much to ask, why can't you share your experiences with us, this is because we learn too much from that. It may bother you but it will teach too many.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #13 on: May 08, 2007, 05:48:34 PM »
You're paying way too much attention to the junk your mind is coming up to scare you with. If you will re-read my first response to you I've already answered your questions about what I expect, which is that you will test negative. Your risk was very low.

Now you need to make some real effort to stay productively busy in your life. If you're willing to do that you will be pleasantly surprised to see how quickly the waiting weeks will pass, at the end of which I do expect you will get a negative test result.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #14 on: May 09, 2007, 07:45:24 AM »
Sycho,

I suggest you read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence. A correctly used condom rarely breaks. One of the most common mistakes that lead to breakage is not making sure there is no air left in the tip of the condom. Read the links so you can learn how to prevent this happening.

We don't discuss symptoms because they are meaningless when it comes to diagnosing hiv. Some people don't have any symptoms at all and if we were to focus on symptoms, people who have had a risk but no symptoms might decide they're in the clear and don't need to test.

For those who do have symptoms, they can range from a brief fever to becoming so ill that hospitalization is necessary. The symptoms are basically flu-like, but so are the symptoms of hundreds, if not thousands, of other illnesses. There is no point in talking about symptoms where hiv is concerned. (but yes, wouldn't it be so much simpler if everyone who was infected came out in lime-green spots for 24 hours)

I also expect you to come out of this brief possible exposure hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SychoWorried

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #15 on: May 09, 2007, 08:05:43 AM »
Ann,

My concern right now is this "rarely break". It happened once with me.

Anyway thanks for the responses, let's wait and see what happens after these 8 months.

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #16 on: May 09, 2007, 10:18:42 AM »
Our responses are the same because they are HONEST and well grounded in science.  WE know the deal.  We give you the facts. 

My negative partner and I have had a couple condoms break (before I found Ann's links!  Thank you doll, havent had one since!  Love ya!) we would immediately stop and put on another one, and resume like bunnies.  She always ends up negative.

HIV isnt EASY to transmit despite all the fear mongering you hear from the media.

Know matter how many times or how many ways you spin/explain your situation our answers won't change.  If they did, we would be doing a disservice to those who come here for factual and reality based answers.  We arent stubborn, we're just right.
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline SychoWorried

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #17 on: May 15, 2007, 10:42:56 AM »
what are the chances that a 6 weeks negative test is conclusive? I am afraid of getting tested and I will finish my 6th week on tomorrow. Should I still wait for the 13th week?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #18 on: May 15, 2007, 12:18:50 PM »
Wait and get your 13 week test.

Offline SychoWorried

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #19 on: June 15, 2007, 11:39:53 AM »
Hello All,

well i would like to thank you for you previous support for me and any other person that is fealing frustrated, anxious and worried.
I am (unwillingly) back to reading about HIV symptoms and stuff like that.
As listed my encounter was not very high but still, I am feeling worried about a white thing in my mouth. Also I am feeling weird things happening in my mouth, on my left inside cheek I have a white coating in a line just where my teeth meet. for the white tongue it comes and goes depending on what I eat. For example if I go out drink too much, smoke too much then i come back to see my tongue very white and hairy-like; If i eat something or drink some juice it's better. I got two spots of white coating just like the images on the web on my inside cheek.
I know you cannot diagnose HIV using symptoms, but how much are you sure about this fact? you are not and no one is sure that symptoms cannot diagnose HIV, you will not be sure, but you will of course be worried as hell. For my case whenever i am worried, i start shaking, my feets start hurting me and I feel very tired.

I do not know how the next month will pass till I go back to my country and get tested.

I really take you as my heros, since you are brave enough to live with such a disease. but I guess you have lots of support. Be coming from a conservative country these kind of things are not easily taken.

My only concern is my mother and my sister. I cannot deceive them, my mother suffered too much to give me food, education, a roof on my head ... My father died when i was 2 years old, so you can imagine.
I am living a nightmare and my only solution if I get to be positive is to suicide.

I know my post is not a question, but I feel i like to talk to someone since i cannot do this with anyone else that is talking about this.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #20 on: June 15, 2007, 05:30:29 PM »
My father died when i was 2 years old, so you can imagine.
I am living a nightmare and my only solution if I get to be positive is to suicide.


Sycho,

It's times to stop with the amateur dramatics and move on from this. If you can't then perhaps you should see a counsellor or mental health worker to discuss your anxieties.

As you've been told the chances of you testing positive are extraordinarily low. I fully expect your 13 week test result to be negative and so should you. Rather than obsessing about HIV and surfing the internet for information you would be wiser to pass the remaining time productively.

One other thing, I have AIDS and I find the idea that the only solution to dealing with a positive diagnosis is through suicide to be rather offensive as well as plain wrong. People all over the world receive positive diagnoses and manage to deal with it. I cannot see why you should be any different.

That said, I still expect you to receive a negative result at week 13.

MtD

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #21 on: June 15, 2007, 06:45:05 PM »
Quote
I am (unwillingly) back to reading about HIV symptoms

Sycho,

You want to report the person holding a gun to your head to the police.

There are people other than us you can talk to about your various emotional problems. They're called therapists and your doctor can refer you to a good one.

As you've been repeatedly told, your chance of testing positive after a condom break is minimal in the extreme. I've yet to see a man end up positive after a condom break with a female.

If you continue to think about suicide, go to your nearest emergency medical center and tell them.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SychoWorried

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #22 on: June 16, 2007, 07:16:10 AM »
Hey thanks a lot for your replies.
matty your reply was a bit harsh but true. so I am going to stop all this nonsense and wait for my 13th week and later i'll see what will happen. I did not mean to be offensive when i said that I cannot handle such disease, and I told you that I take you as my heroes.

Ann you're always very sweet.

ok then, thank you.

Offline SychoWorried

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #23 on: August 18, 2007, 11:04:53 PM »
Hello All,

What's up? I hope everything is ok.

Ann I've read in the "I just Tested Poz" forum that there is a guy that contracted HIV due to Condom breakage, and I also read that you always say that you have never heard of anyone that contracts HIV through a condom breakage, so what's the true story?

what are the new meds of HIV, combivir , ... are supposed old stuff right? what's the new advantages of Truvada , ... ?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #24 on: August 19, 2007, 05:07:23 AM »
Unless you are infected, it doesn't matter about any of the drugs. At the time you are infected, your ID doctor will go over all the medications that are available.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #25 on: August 19, 2007, 06:36:06 AM »
Psycho,

I've never heard of an INSERTIVE partner who became hiv positive following a condom break. The poster in the other forum (which you should really keep your nose out of) wasn't the insertive partner.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SychoWorried

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #26 on: September 07, 2007, 06:46:15 PM »
Hello All,

I came back to my country and week number 22 results: Non Reactivo.

I have done the Elisa Test, is this conclusive ?

Thank you Ann, RapidRod, Andy, ACinKC, jblove,MtD.

Really thank you for all the support

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Chances are?
« Reply #27 on: September 07, 2007, 06:55:29 PM »
Sycho,

Yes, you are absolutely, conclusively hiv negative.

Make sure you read the three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can avoid having a condom break on you again. A correctly used condom RARELY breaks. Use them for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SychoWorried

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Total Nonsense
« Reply #28 on: November 12, 2007, 12:49:43 PM »
Hello Forum,

I searched for this website before when I had an accident of condom brokage about 8 months ago. you people helped me alot, after 5 months of the incident i tested negative. Since that accident i didn't had sex anymore, by the way m in a dangerous area (south east africa).

Well I want somenoe to help me assess my current situation. I was with a girl of unknown HIV status. we kissed , I licked her breasts ... she blowjobed me, I insisted on using a condom. we didn't had intercouse, she was sick (femal sickness), but we played a little bit with our clothes on (imitating sex positions ...) , and maybe my penis went out of my jeans , she had her clothes on.

What is the risk I had ? what is the risk of getting other STDs, hepatitis ? siphilis ....

Maybe I shouldn't post here instead i should post in the "I'm getting crazy forum". However I am now always skeptic and feeling fear all time long , even when I go to the club I am afraid that someone put a needle in my arm ...

Thank you

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Chances are?
« Reply #29 on: November 12, 2007, 01:50:58 PM »
First of all I have merged your latest question with your previous thread. Please follow our rule and keep all of your comments in the same thread.

Nothing you did during this most recent incident has put you at risk for HIV transmission. You should know that by now so maybe you need to re-read our lesson on transmission. There is a link to it in the welcome thread which opens this section.

For instance, getting a blowjob, even without a condom is absolutely not a risk for transmission. In the entire history of the epidemic no guy has ever been infected from getting sucked off. And you aren't going to become the first.

Given what you have described I don't see you at risk for anything. We do advise generally that anyone who is sexually active ought to regularly have a full STD panel done. That means at least annually.

This time out I don't see any cause for concern.  And that stuff about a needle in your arm at a club. I can't even take that seriously enough to comment further.
Andy Velez

 


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