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Author Topic: Well, Goodbye again  (Read 1089 times)

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Offline Billy B

  • Member
  • Posts: 374
Well, Goodbye again
« on: September 06, 2013, 03:30:31 PM »
After a year sabbatical from this forum I will be leavings. Not much as changed in that year as I see many old members (even the catty bitches) are still here and I am thankful for that. A lot of new people are here and I have mixed emotions about this. I am thankful that they found this place when in need like I did, but really hate that the need still exists.
The quad pill is working well for most taking it and it gives me something to use should my current meds start to fail.
I am also glad that I am finally going to be retiring and doing some fun things before my time is up. I expect to do a lot and live for many more years because I am stronger than this virus.
Peace and Deuces Y'all,
Billy B
VL 4420 CD4 340 CD4% 24   3/15/10 Started I&T
VL  UD   CD4 340 CD4% 26.5 05/13/10
VL  UD   CD4 360 CD4% 27.1 08/3/10
VL  UD   CD4 310 CD4% 28.4 11/22/10
VL  UD   CD4 420 CD4% 27.9 02/11/11
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 26.4 06/08/11
VL  UD   CD4 360 CD4% 27.7 09/23/11
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 28.3 01/20/12
VL  UD   CD4 430 CD4% 28.8 05/11/12
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 28.1 09/07/12
VL  UD   CD4 390 CD4% 32.3 03/14/13

Offline cicero

  • Member
  • Posts: 66
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2013, 05:15:34 PM »
Hi Billy, I am one of the new people here :) and I am glad that this forum exists. It has helped me a lot and I'm only a month in and I too am disappointed in the fact that the need exists, especially for me, someone who thought he would never "get it".

The voices of support here, from people who have been living with HIV for years, several for decades, have, like I said, helped me a lot.  But as I've posted I've wondered how people who have been living their lives feel at us newbies coming in whiny and devastated -- where were we (me) as a voice of support and an information gatherer before we were directly in the same boat? How does our fear read to people who didn't have all the options and positive outlooks for treatment to those who didn't have it when they first learned their diagnosis?

I had HIV in my life through a couple of friends over the years...and thought I knew how difficult it was to learn you're HIV+ and then begin coping with it, but I could only estimate. Now I know but still not like those who have had many years or are LTS that I admire greatly.

I don't think that was the spirit of your post or necessarily why you're taking leave from the forums, but if I recall you provided some solid words to me early on so thanks for that.  Enjoy you're retirement and I'm glad your looking forward to many more happy years of life.

Arrivederci!
"How could this happen to lovely me?" -Jacqueline Susann

Online Jeff G

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 9,275
  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #2 on: September 06, 2013, 05:34:59 PM »
Hi Cicero . We all have the OMG I'm HIV positive moment and most all of us has whined a time or dozen about HIV , I know I have . 

Its sad to see people test poz but as a LTS that still learns thing from our members no matter what date they joined the ranks of poz I don't see whiners , I  see opportunity .

The new people on the block may come in deviated but that soon turns to empowerment and the ones who needed support last month are offering support this month . 

Offline Billy B

  • Member
  • Posts: 374
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #3 on: September 06, 2013, 05:48:02 PM »
 " A lot of new people are here and I have mixed emotions about this. I am thankful that they found this place when in need like I did, but really hate that the need still exists.

cicero ,  Please let me clear this up,  I meant that I hate that people are still dealing with HIV. I had hoped that in my lifetime that there would have been a cure.
Peace and Deuces Y'all at least for a while,
Billy B
VL 4420 CD4 340 CD4% 24   3/15/10 Started I&T
VL  UD   CD4 340 CD4% 26.5 05/13/10
VL  UD   CD4 360 CD4% 27.1 08/3/10
VL  UD   CD4 310 CD4% 28.4 11/22/10
VL  UD   CD4 420 CD4% 27.9 02/11/11
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 26.4 06/08/11
VL  UD   CD4 360 CD4% 27.7 09/23/11
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 28.3 01/20/12
VL  UD   CD4 430 CD4% 28.8 05/11/12
VL  UD   CD4 370 CD4% 28.1 09/07/12
VL  UD   CD4 390 CD4% 32.3 03/14/13

Offline moxieinme

  • Member
  • Posts: 89
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #4 on: September 06, 2013, 06:16:06 PM »
I've wondered how people who have been living their lives feel at us newbies coming in whiny and devastated -- where were we (me) as a voice of support and an information gatherer before we were directly in the same boat? How does our fear read to people who didn't have all the options and positive outlooks for treatment to those who didn't have it when they first learned their diagnosis?
I am a newbie to the Forums but not to HIV as a LTS (24+ years). The Forums have been rewarding and eye-opening for me and helped me regain some perspective not only on being a LTS but on living with HIV in general.

That perspective includes *all* voices. Hearing about the experiences of the newly diagnosed or people who have only begun living with HIV in recent years has actually helped me connect with my own experiences and reflecrt on where I've been and what I overcame. It's a privilege, too, if I am able to return the favor and offer a different perspective to a "newbie" so they can be stronger too.

In fact, in my experience with HIV, you'll always wind up a newbie somehow some way. You'll gain new experiences and knowledge and successes and setbacks. You may get second, third, fourth, or fifth chances at life as HIV becomes a part of the fabric of your world and affects the course of your life in small and big ways.

So hooray for the newbies new and old. All voices are valuable, necessary, and appreciated.
Salvage therapy wrangler, riding the poz bronco and dodging bullets for over 24 years.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
CD4 at diagnosis 1989 = 330
Began treatment (AZT) 1989
Lowest labs 1998: CD4=74, 7%, VL=750,000
First sustained undetectable VL in 20 years (2009); CD4=315
Current labs (12/13): CD4=637, 27%, VL=<20
Current meds: Prezista, Isentress, Intellence, Norvir

Offline cicero

  • Member
  • Posts: 66
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #5 on: September 06, 2013, 08:15:26 PM »
cicero ,  Please let me clear this up,  I meant that I hate that people are still dealing with HIV. I had hoped that in my lifetime that there would have been a cure.
Peace and Deuces Y'all at least for a while,
Billy B

Yes, I understand Billy.  :)  Perhaps there still will be!
"How could this happen to lovely me?" -Jacqueline Susann

Offline tednlou2

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,608
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #6 on: September 06, 2013, 10:23:21 PM »
I'm confused. 

Offline weasel

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,588
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #7 on: September 07, 2013, 09:09:14 AM »
Yes, I understand Billy.  :)  Perhaps there still will be!

     Howdy ,
                  I often feel the same way , But as we all know people are infected daily with HIV
   plus a multitude of other STD's .

    Having had HIV / AIDS over have my life I hope that some of my words of wisdom are heard .
 It has been a fairly easy road for me , But when I freaked out when I turned AIDS these forums
 saved my life . I would in no way ever judge anyone for getting HIV today . If I had been more
careful when having sex , or even careful at all !   Maybe I would not be here .
  I was very aware of what AIDS was doing to my friends in the early years , I was infected before the
scientists even came up with the term HIV .
   I hope you continue to thrive   and enjoy retirement .  Maybe you will pop in and see us all again  :)

                                                               Weasel

    P.s. It is often the newbee's that put my world in perspective .  When I'm lost ,  reading posts
 on this site works wonders for my mood , knowing I will never be alone .
   Yes I often wish and pray for a cure . Not having this bug would be a great thing !
" Live and let Live "

Offline wolfter

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,036
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #8 on: September 07, 2013, 10:15:07 AM »
I had mixed reactions when first reading this.  I never imagined becoming so close to a group of on-line people.  And then meeting so many over the past few years, I couldn't imagine not having them in my life.

I initially found this site because of my dire situation, seeking information.  This, after already surviving with this virus for over 20 years.  I assumed that I'd get what I needed and move on.  I soon discovered that would be selfish.  Since I rec'd so much support, I feel a duty to attempt to give back.  Never sure if I contribute anything positive, but I try.

I've rolled my eyes quite often when reading posts from newbies, but then re-evaluated my mindset.  I learned as much from them as I've taught and coached. 

Best wishes

Wolfie
Judging someone does not define them, it defines you. 

True peace is not merely the absence of war, it is the presence of justice.

Offline J.R.E.

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,962
  • Joined Dec-2003 Living positive, since 1985.
Re: Well, Goodbye again
« Reply #9 on: September 07, 2013, 01:47:28 PM »

I am also glad that I am finally going to be retiring and doing some fun things before my time is up. I expect to do a lot and live for many more years because I am stronger than this virus.
Peace and Deuces Y'all,
Billy B


I'm right behind ya!! I apply for Social security on Monday, and I have about 110 days to go, before I am out of the workforce.  I agree, It's time relax, and just take it easy, and do the fun things in life !!

Enjoy---Ray
Current Meds ; Viramune, Epzicom, 40mg of simvastatin, 12.5mg of Hydrochlorothiazide.
Metoprolol tartrate 25mg



http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=40802.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=45159.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39722.msg495621;topicseen#msg495621

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=46806.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39414.msg491701#msg491701


 In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started my first  HAART regimen  on October 24th,03.

 As of DEC 9th, 2013,  t-cells are at 437 Viral load  <40 .

 Current % is at 16% (L)

  
 62 years young.

 


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