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Dating an HIV- Partner

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Andy Velez:
I'm glad you've brought this up. Along with the other excellent info and responses you've received, I would urge you two to keep your conversations about sex and your feelings around this issue as open, direct and simple as possible. That will strengthen and deepen the intimacy of your relationship and just might make sex more enjoyable too.

Keep us posted on how it's going.


Thanks guys for the advice, makes me feel more comfortable to hear that others have maintained relationships with patners that are -ve. It gets abit confusing especially with the ladies as we tend to discharge rather messily if you know what i mean so it kinda gets confusing especially when fore play involves being fingered and the other party is unsure whether to or not but i guess its all about not having cuts on the finger and washing hands after intercourse. What about french kissing is it still risky if you dont have any form of bleeding in the mouth? have any of your partners had babies and did pregnancy affect the CD4 count negatively in anyway even with meds?

Hi spicey.  My husband is negative as I am poz.  We unfortunatly did not know going into this relationship but after finding out, it has been fine.  We are very open about discussing what we can and/or can't do.  Although at times I can feel very uncomfortable about putting him in any sort of risk, we know what is safe.  We practice the safe sex and just got his conclusive test about a week ago, which is about 11 months after my diagnosis, that he is still neg.  Thank god. 
Also, looking back at when and how I did end up contracting HIV, I did have a child without even knowing I was poz.  Must have been right after I contracted or that is when I contracted it.  My daughter is now going to be 9, happy and healthy.  It is possible to have a child, follow up closely with your doctor and make sure you can handle it before you attempt it.  Good luck in your new relationship.

My partner and I will celebrate our 1 year anniversary next week. It has been a long road but worth every second. I am not saying you will not hit a speed bump in the road of love because you will. Just make sure you have him read the lessons section of the website. I have to remind my partner he is not a medical doctor at times. When the time is right and if your comfortable take him with you to a doctors appointment. I never imagined some of the questions he came up with when he went with me. In many ways your relationship will be stronger because of the virus, but in some ways it will be strange for some time. I still fear giving him the virus quite a bit but we talk and he is always the first to suggest some new way to have fun without putting him at risk. One hell of a man.
I hope this helps and if you have any questions just ask.

Okie Cowboy Guy
 :o ;D

Hi Spicey,

I am neg and my honey is poz.  Our biggest prob is that despite precautions he at time is worried about infecting me.  I just have to talk to him about his feelings and fears and let him know it's OK.  Giving him space during those times and not forcing anything seems to do best for us.  Good luck to you in this, it isn't always easy but love never is.


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