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Author Topic: Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life  (Read 924 times)

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Offline wolfthorn

  • Member
  • Posts: 85
Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life
« on: August 16, 2013, 12:04:50 AM »
Right now, in the course of the day, I manage to check out websites for arctic adventures, plan for retirement, and shop for coffins ( I refuse to spend my last hours prior to cremation in a box that doesn't fit my height)  and oncologists.

I feel better because my viral load is probably down, but this whole thing is so anxiety generating...  I haven't had a good natural night of sleep in a month.

I guess I am at an in between time. Not in shok but not adjusted either.
7/10/13: Oraquick at Home (+)
7/11/13: CD4 <20, VL 286,000
7/26/13: Start Stribild, Bactrim, Azithromycin
8/13/13: CD4 64, VL 1194
9/11/13: CD4 87, VL 511
10/14/13: CD4 164, VL 34
10/15/13: Stop Azithromycin!

Offline Peterdenmark

  • Member
  • Posts: 80
Re: Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2013, 05:43:01 PM »
Hi

Just wanted to tell I truly understand You, because I share many of your thoughts.
Not ready to die, not ready to live - not yet

Waiting for numbers to improve - and hoping for the best.
But, having said that, we always need to show strength.

And, this forum helps me not feeling all alone :)

Looking for places too, I will visit when my doc allow me to travel again. Not the arctic though, I prefer Thailand ;D

Wish u all the best

Warm thoughts from Denmark

Peter

 


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