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In need of some advice

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gloworm:
Hello,

I was diagnosed with HIV about 3 three weeks ago.  When I found out my status, I told my boyfriend (he isn't the one that infected me).  It has been 3 weeks and he hasn't went to get tested yet.  I really need for him to be tested so I will know if he is okay.  He says that he loves me and we are going to be together but our relationship has changed in these 3 weeks. I really love him and I just feel so guilty about all of this.  Even though I didn't know that I am infected, I could have possibly passed it to him and that hurts me and keeps me up at night a lot.

My question and where I need advice is, how do I convince him to go and get tested?  He told me at one point that he doesn't want to know if he does or doesn't but he needs to know, I need to know.  Would I be wrong to keep pushing him to get tested, or do I just want for him to be ready to get tested?

Jessy:
Hi
Wait till he's ready thats if he will "ever"be ready....you see maybe he is scared of his actions once he realises that he's not positive?! How sure are you that he's not the one who infected you? Did you get checked beforehand? Or he could already know that he is infected or may be just scared!!

Talk to him explaining that you are worried about him and terminate any sexual(penetrative) contact without a condom for now as its gets messy if one plays the blame game.

Pls let us know how you get on.

klassykitty:
Gloworm,

How long have you been with your boyfriend?

Has he been to your doctors with you?  If not maybe you can suggest to him that he goes to an appt. with you and then your dr. can talk to him about it.  You can also try talking to someone at an Aids Service Orginization, they may talk to him.

When my ex-husband was diagnosed I went to his first couple dr. visits and went to the ASO with him. They had counseling for the negative person of a pos. & neg. relationship (can't think of the long word.).  His doctor also talked to me by myself.

Good luck and keep us updated.

Michelle 8)

I found it easier to talk to his doctor and the guy at the ASO then to him.

I would also have him get a complete STI test where they test for everything.

gloworm:
He and I have been together for about 10 months.  We had a talk about everything and he is going to get tested next week. I am praying that his test comes back negative.


--- Quote from: klassykitty on July 26, 2013, 11:21:13 PM ---Gloworm,

How long have you been with your boyfriend?

Has he been to your doctors with you?  If not maybe you can suggest to him that he goes to an appt. with you and then your dr. can talk to him about it.  You can also try talking to someone at an Aids Service Orginization, they may talk to him.

When my ex-husband was diagnosed I went to his first couple dr. visits and went to the ASO with him. They had counseling for the negative person of a pos. & neg. relationship (can't think of the long word.).  His doctor also talked to me by myself.

Good luck and keep us updated.

Michelle 8)

I found it easier to talk to his doctor and the guy at the ASO then to him.

I would also have him get a complete STI test where they test for everything.

--- End quote ---

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