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Author Topic: 41 years old but feel like im 80  (Read 2339 times)

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Offline phillypinko

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41 years old but feel like im 80
« on: July 20, 2013, 03:17:33 PM »
Oh lord I get so exhausted and anxious during the day I can hardly put two words together.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2013, 03:36:38 PM »
Hey! Sorry you are so tired. What's going on with your numbers? Stress? Life stuff?
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline phillypinko

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #2 on: July 23, 2013, 01:19:21 AM »
Hey! Sorry you are so tired. What's going on with your numbers? Stress? Life stuff?
Physically im fine my count floats between 700 and 1100. Bipolar is all over the place from my parents being ill.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #3 on: July 23, 2013, 01:39:14 AM »
Physically im fine my count floats between 700 and 1100. Bipolar is all over the place from my parents being ill.


Ugh, that's stress, big-time. Also, elderly parents make us feel, well, pretty worn out. My mom is elderly, and has Alzheimer's - coasting at relatively mild for a few years, but there's this voice in the back of one's head counting the days and weeks and events. It's scary stuff.

Unload here if you want. Even if it's only two words. I imagine more than a few of us forty - and fifty - something folks are entering that caregiving phase, or at the very least the "worrying" phase over our folks.

Dad died in 2001. Awful thing. Shook up my whole world. It isn't that I love my mother any less, but... I think with her, there's been more time for goodbyes and closure. It will be awful, I know that. But it will be different. Also, I'm older too.

And after the horrors of the heart of the pandemic, I imagine more than a little PTSD sneaks in there as well.


Great post, great topic.


 
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline BT65

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #4 on: July 23, 2013, 04:23:49 AM »
I just posted in the no smoking topic about aging parents.  I helped, with my oldest sister who lives in the area, take care of both my parents when they were in their final days.  They were both ill, my mom died in August, my dad the following month.  It's been about 5 years since my mom died.  Yesterday was her birthday. 

Since my parents took care of me, plus off and on during struggles during my adult years, taking care of them was a pleasure. Not easy, I was going to school full time getting my undergrad degree, and there were times I was up all night because my mom had such a hard time breathing, or my dad had to go to the hospital because he couldn't breathe. 

I know it's tiring.  And when bipolar is thrown in, it can be downright awful.  Are you on treatment for this?  Sorry if you posted about it already, I can't remember.  Do you see a therapist?  That may be helpful. 

Just continue being honest and getting support from us.  I also would not hesitate to contact Hospice when it gets to that time.  They are wonderful and also offer families support.  Keep posting!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline phillypinko

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #5 on: July 23, 2013, 06:07:05 AM »
Ugh, that's stress, big-time. Also, elderly parents make us feel, well, pretty worn out. My mom is elderly, and has Alzheimer's - coasting at relatively mild for a few years, but there's this voice in the back of one's head counting the days and weeks and events. It's scary stuff.

Unload here if you want. Even if it's only two words. I imagine more than a few of us forty - and fifty - something folks are entering that caregiving phase, or at the very least the "worrying" phase over our folks.

Dad died in 2001. Awful thing. Shook up my whole world. It isn't that I love my mother any less, but... I think with her, there's been more time for goodbyes and closure. It will be awful, I know that. But it will be different. Also, I'm older too.

And after the horrors of the heart of the pandemic, I imagine more than a little PTSD sneaks in there as well.


Great post, great topic.
Yeah. My family is very conservative and thinks all mental problems are nonsense. That its all "in my head". My family and friends think I've been "milking" my HIV diagnosis for the last 20 years. Its all so ugly and stupid. When I want to talk about how HIV has effected me I hear from them, "stop complaining and take responsibility for your actions." I didn't realize wanting to talk meant I was complaining or being irresponsible.

Offline harleymc

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #6 on: July 27, 2013, 09:12:46 PM »
Good luck with looking after your folks. Don't be afraid to access any assistance you can find from service groups or neighbours or church etc etc. Do you have brothers or sisters who can help, or are they too important to help out their own family?

I find that when I'm tired and external pressures get too much I need to structure some time for myself, whether it's going for a walk, or a swim, or doing a bit of drawing.

Big Hugs

Offline phillypinko

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #7 on: August 01, 2013, 01:27:45 AM »
Good luck with looking after your folks. Don't be afraid to access any assistance you can find from service groups or neighbours or church etc etc. Do you have brothers or sisters who can help, or are they too important to help out their own family?

I find that when I'm tired and external pressures get too much I need to structure some time for myself, whether it's going for a walk, or a swim, or doing a bit of drawing.

Big Hugs
My brother and sister have their own families and full time jobs to worry about. They visited when my parents were in the hospital then vanished once they bounced back a little bit. I've been left alone with them most of time.

Offline phillypinko

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2013, 03:03:42 AM »
My parents are doing much better. As their health improves my mental health is improving. My doc is playing around with my meds and is adding an anxiety disorder to my diagnosis. I feel like im 60 now instead of 80.

Offline Theyer

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Re: 41 years old but feel like im 80
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2013, 06:09:55 AM »
60,s fab pinko its the new er 60.

It was good to read off things settling down you have worked for it.

All the Best

mhtv born Oct 1957
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

 


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