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Author Topic: Scared!  (Read 1959 times)

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Offline Seminew2this

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Scared!
« on: June 12, 2013, 03:11:53 PM »
Hello everyone. I'm very happy to have found a site with such supportive members.

That being said I'm scared out of my mind. I'm a 29 year old male living in NY I was officially diagnosed hiv+ after taking an online based std test at a local lab. I say officially because I tested positive a few years ago and still haven't seen a specialist(lack of insurance. Money. Being scared etc)

The only person who knows my status is my boss/good friend who has urged me to seek medical attention for years.

I'm writing this because I haven't been feeling well for the past couple months. Bad cramps. Slight anemia. Extreme fatigue. Night sweats. I've lost 15lbs since dec.

I have the information for the doctor and plan on calling this afternoon.

I've made some bad choices in life. Waiting is obviously the worst one.

I'm looking for a little advice. Support. Anything to put my mind slightly at ease.

Is there still hope for me ( I know I don't have any levels to post for a more accurate assessment.)

Thanks in advance for everything
R

Offline Ann

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #1 on: June 12, 2013, 03:39:41 PM »

I was officially diagnosed hiv+ after taking an online based std test at a local lab. I say officially because I tested positive a few years ago and still haven't seen a specialist(lack of insurance. Money. Being scared etc)


R,

You cannot be officially diagnosed with anything after taking an "online based test".

The ONLY way to be officially diagnosed with hiv is through having a positive antibody test, and confirmed with a positive Western Blot test.

Antibody testing is done with saliva or blood, and WB testing is done with blood.

Neither can be done "online".

Unless you've had a positive antibody test backed up with a positive WB, you cannot be considered hiv positive.

If you only had a rapid test that you never followed up on with further diagnostic testing, it could have been a false positive. That's why WB tests are run, to rule out false positives.

I'm moving your thread to the Just Tested forum, until you can clarify your testing situation.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Seminew2this

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #2 on: June 12, 2013, 03:42:08 PM »
I had blood taken at a lab. They sent it to get tested and one of the doctors called and said it came back positive

Offline Ann

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #3 on: June 12, 2013, 04:03:35 PM »
Welcome to the forums, by the way. I meant to say that first time around.

In your first post you said, "taking an online based std test at a local lab". Then you said..

I had blood taken at a lab. They sent it to get tested and one of the doctors called and said it came back positive

Ok, so good so far. I now understand that you had blood drawn for "std test" at a lab where it was tested - but for what?

What, exactly, was the positive result? Was it a WB? You never specified. You/we need to know.

Sorry if I'm sounding harsh here, but we want to make sure people really are diagnosed poz before we start jumping the gun and talking treatments and lab results and whatnot.

It's for your benefit too - false positive rapid tests do happen and when they do, sometimes people freak out and don't go back for follow-up. *ahem*

By the way, we had someone here (Am I forum) in recent memory who thought he was definitely poz after taking an online quiz on some laboratory's website, who sold test kits for all sorts of STIs. His quiz results urged him to test, so he assumed he was poz. Can you see where my alarm bells started ringing when you said "online based std test"?

So two questions:

1. Do you know if you tested positive on both an antibody and a WB?

2. Are you still having insurance problems? If so, is this interfering with proper follow-up testing?

Ann



Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Seminew2this

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #4 on: June 12, 2013, 04:22:21 PM »
Sorry about the confusion. I definitely was trying to think of a way to describe the test.

According to the results email they sent me after the phone consultation
I tested positive on the western blot test

It also said hiv 1 antibody value >50.00, range <1.00, result positive

Offline Seminew2this

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2013, 04:23:42 PM »
I still don't have insurance. Started investigating into it. But it's very expensive. I was planning to pay out of pocket and take it from there

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #6 on: June 12, 2013, 04:34:41 PM »
I still don't have insurance. Started investigating into it. But it's very expensive. I was planning to pay out of pocket and take it from there

You should go to GMHC http://www.gmhc.org/ and register as a client, get assigned a case manager who can assess your income level and how to access HIV care in an affordable manner. I would advise not procrastinating on this issue. I think GMHC only does intake once a week -- fish around at that link. I can't recall if you make an appointment or have to go sit and wait. But if you work all week you're going to have to take a half day off to get it done.

If you're too poor to buy insurance it's not logical to think you're going to pay out of pocket.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Scared!
« Reply #7 on: June 12, 2013, 04:42:50 PM »

Sorry about the confusion.


Not a problem. At least now we know where we stand.

Take a good look around that website Miss P linked you to - it's the place to start if you're in NY. And like he says, don't procrastinate. You need to get further testing done to find out where you and your numbers are at ASAP.

But at the same time, don't panic. Keep talking to your friend who urged you to test - he sounds like a source of immediate support. And of course we're here for you too.

You will be ok.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mecch

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2013, 04:47:12 PM »
I still don't have insurance. Started investigating into it. But it's very expensive. I was planning to pay out of pocket and take it from there
I think there are very very few people in this world who can finance medical followup and treatment for an HIV infection "out of pocket".  So you have to figure out a way to "get into" the medical system.  It may not be easy or obvious how to do this so you should get to an ASO, as others have mentioned, and get advice on the medical coverage (financing) aspect of being HIV+. 
Also, that is if you are HIV+.
Also, welcome to the forum!!!!
ďFrom each, according to his ability; to each, according to his needĒ 1875 K Marx

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2013, 04:51:45 PM »
Other options are to go to Callen Lorde in Chelsea: http://callen-lorde.org/

Or Center for Care, which (impressively just announced 3 weeks ago) has just been renamed the Spencer Cox Center for Health

http://spencercoxcenter.org/

Actually I would go to the second link as I've heard great things about their services, plus they have three locations. They also have case managers on site I'm quite sure and they will sort your insurance issues out or get you on some public plan, that way you don't have to go through the GMHC drama. And trust me, it can be drama.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2013, 04:54:34 PM by Miss Philicia »
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Seminew2this

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Re: Scared!
« Reply #10 on: June 12, 2013, 09:12:12 PM »
Thanks for the help.

I should've been a little more specific on location. I live on Long Island in NY any tips for case workers/assistance etc. would be great!

Offline jkinatl2

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  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Scared!
« Reply #11 on: June 12, 2013, 11:54:50 PM »
I understand you are scared, but unless I am mistaken you have access to the same Google that I do. It took me three seconds to find this:

http://www.liaac.org/

You have GOT to be proactive. EMpowering yourself will mitigate that fear. You can do this.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

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