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Author Topic: How to keep calm?  (Read 1704 times)

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Offline svl003

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How to keep calm?
« on: June 11, 2013, 06:05:52 PM »
Hello all, just thought I'd reach out to a forum to *attempt* to control my anxiety levels while I wait for my third and final test for HIV. on 4/17 I engaged in oral sex with another guy whose HIV status I am not sure of, though he told me he gets tested regularly and I have no reason to not believe him. Then again, there are people in the world who lie about this stuff so I really don't know. He asked if I wanted to have sex and I told him no, so we didn't, also there was no ejaculation involved for either of us.

Anyways, moving forward to more recently. A couple of weeks ago I developed a small patch of bumps across the back of my hand/wrist and I immediately scratched it, causing it to turn red and very noticeable. I took this as a rash and immediately looked up what could cause it and got very nervous when HIV infection came up - I went to my doctors office and she didn't seem too concerned however tests for all STD's were run and I got my results next day from the labs; all negative. (roughly 5 weeks, 6 days post potential exposure)

I still continued to worry and sought the advice of another doctor, again who expressed very little concern both about my bumps on my hand or the experience with this other guy. The doctor told me she would send for more tests, not because she was concerned, but solely for peace of mind - this past friday I got more blood drawn and the doctor I saw requested both a standard anti-body test as well as an RNA test. I got the standard results back last night (negative) and am currently waiting for the last results. From understanding this RNA test is definitive so as you can imagine I'm very anxious.

I know oral sex is very low risk, some would say none at all and usually the rash, if associated with acute HIV infection would usually show up along side a fever and other symptoms. I've been getting headaches pretty regularly as well but I think that's more due to the current stress levels I'm experiencing.

What does everyone think? What would the likelihood of testing positive via the RNA test be after testing negative at 6 and 7.5 weeks?

I'm usually such a carefree person and this HIV scare is completely wrecking me.

Any advice?

Offline Jeff G

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #1 on: June 11, 2013, 06:21:56 PM »
Oral sex isn't a risk for HIV . There are proteins and enzymes that damage HIV rendering it unable to infect . There have been no fewer than three separate serodiscordant couples studies (where one person is HIV positive, the other negative.) These couples were tracked for three. five and ten years. The couples used condoms for penetrative vaginal and anal sex, but NO BARRIER at all for oral sex. Any kind of oral sex.

These studies yielded NO infections.

Sexually , HIV is transmitted during unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse . As long as you are consistently and correctly using condoms for those two activity's you will avoid exposure to HIV , it really is that simple .

If you haven't engaged in unprotected vaginal and anal sex in the 3 months prior to your HIV test then you are HIV negative and do not need further HIV testing at this time .

The symptoms you mentioned are not specific to HIV infections so we do not discuss symptoms for that reason .

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #2 on: June 11, 2013, 06:53:42 PM »
I just wanted to chime in and promote Moderator Jeff's message. You really are worrying unnecessarily.

If you do even the most cursory review of this site we have not classified oral sex as an appreciable risk for years and years. I wouldn't think to suggest that a person even test over it, much less worry so much.

Use a condom for penetrative anal and vginal sex, don't share IV drug needles, and you will avoid HIV. It really is that simple!

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline svl003

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #3 on: February 26, 2014, 04:48:01 PM »
Hello all, I write to you from my dorm room where I'm currently trying not to go crazy. About 3-3.5 weeks ago I hooked up with another girl here, I didn't know at the time but have since found out she has quite the track record here (she's been around...ALOT) - before I knew this though, we proceeded to get intimate and she performed oral on me on two separate occasions. I was completely open about my past and more-so open about the fact that I have herpes type 1 on my genitals. I wouldn't be so worried about all this if it wasn't for the fact I think I had the very start of an outbreak the second time I got oral. (which can supposedly facilitate the spread of HIV)

It's now three weeks later and I've developed a sore throat, which, of course, can be read as a symptom of ARS - There is no flu, rash or any of the other symptoms so I'm not sure if I'm just overthinking this or not. I got an antibody test done at 22 days and it came back negative. I talked to her and she said she got tested in December and it was all negative. I would believe her, but then again who knows how many potential exposures she's had. I plan on getting retested at 5-6 weeks.

but for now, I really don't know what to do, I've never been this afraid in my life.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #4 on: February 26, 2014, 05:05:45 PM »
The only one at risk, is you giving the girl HSV1. Oral sex isn't a risk.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #5 on: February 26, 2014, 05:27:31 PM »
Please only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or subject matter . You can find your thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here .

You just attempted to create another account, if you do it again you will be banned permanently .

Please reread your thread . You did not have a risk .

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Although you did not have a risk and do not need to test for this specific incident , anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Offline svl003

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #6 on: October 09, 2015, 06:51:10 PM »
Hey everyone, so I know there's always a ton of talk on these forums about the possibility of getting infected to HIV from oral sex, both receiving and giving. I was with someone earlier this week and we proceeded to give each other oral sex - all was fine until the next morning when I realized I had a couple of seemingly-open sores on the head of my penis. I freaked out and immediately went to the doctor who believes it was herpes. I know there's a lot of documentation out there on how herpes can increase your chances of getting infected. I'm worried sick, I don't think he had any cuts or anything in his mouth, but at the same time, I'm thinking to myself that all it would take is a tiny bit of blood to get me infected.

 I feel like I've made a huge mistake and I'm having lots of trouble eating, sleeping and thinking straight. I don't know his status, although he claims to have been recently tested but I'm not sure if I believe him. I'm usually so careful with this stuff, and I'm waiting for a couple of weeks to get tested w/ a PCR test my doctor ordered for me.


Offline Jeff G

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Re: How to keep calm?
« Reply #7 on: October 09, 2015, 07:07:28 PM »
Please only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or subject matter . You can find your thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here .

Getting a blow job is not a risk and herpes does not make a no risk blow job a risk.


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