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Author Topic: freaking out...  (Read 828 times)

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Offline terrified204

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freaking out...
« on: June 08, 2013, 02:43:22 PM »
Hello everyone, I hope I can get some insight from the experts here.

Last January, after a party, I had sex with a guy I know. He was the top, and I was the receptive partner.  We used a condom, but the sex was rough (sorry if this is too graphic) and the condom broke.  We didn't notice until it was over. 

I didn't think any of it because I know the person.  But on Thursday, he sent me a text telling me he tested positive for HIV, and that I need to get tested.

This freaked me out immediately! I have not felt this much anxiety ever in my life. So, about an hour after getting the text, I went to the pharmacy to get a home HIV test, the one called ora quick.

I got home, and took the test and it was negative.  I was at least able to rest somewhat easier.  But I still feel scared... terrified.  I have been going over a lot of information on the web, and I don't know what to do next.  I know I'm outside the window, but I keep wondering if a pharmacy test is really trustworthy.  I now keep hearing "HIV" and "AIDS" everywhere.  Did people really talk so much about this before I had this experience?  Ugh....

I have browsed through forums, but some seem to rely on statistical probabilities (medhelp) and I just want to be absolutely certain that I can put this behind me and that I didn't get infected with HIV.

Does anybody know anything about this test?  Their website is most definitely NOT reassuring.

Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: freaking out...
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2013, 03:08:47 PM »
Hi Terrified , the HIV test is accurate and you do net have to worry , you are HIV negative if the risk in January was your only concern .

 To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED FURTHER HIV TESTING AT THIS TIME FROM THIS INCIDENT , anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Offline terrified204

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Re: freaking out...
« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2013, 03:45:46 PM »
OMG! Thank you, Jeff!

January was the last time I had sex (it was with him) and I don't do drugs of any kind. I have only had three partners and I always exercise caution with condom use.  I hope this doesn't scare me from having sex.

I'm having a drink tonight, and then I'm going to stay off the internet.

Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: freaking out...
« Reply #3 on: June 08, 2013, 03:57:24 PM »
OMG! Thank you, Jeff!

January was the last time I had sex (it was with him) and I don't do drugs of any kind. I have only had three partners and I always exercise caution with condom use.  I hope this doesn't scare me from having sex.

I'm having a drink tonight, and then I'm going to stay off the internet.

You are welcome , that's what we are here for . You can relax and get on with your life now . If you had a even the slightest risk I would have told you so that you could get tested .

Just remember to consistently use condoms for vaginal and anal sex and you will avoid exposure to HIV .

Online Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: freaking out...
« Reply #4 on: June 09, 2013, 05:22:44 AM »
terrified,

Make sure you read through the condom and lube links in my and Jeff's signature lines. (They're the same links.) A correctly used condom rarely breaks.

It sounds like you two probably weren't using enough water-based lube. When you bottom you're much more likely to know when more lube is needed than your top is - so pay attention and keep things well-lubed. Even some spit (his or yours, it doesn't matter as saliva is NOT infectious) is better than nothing and better than an oil-based lube.

I suggest you read a lengthy post I made here about correct condom usage. Yes, when I say lengthy, I mean lengthy. But don't do a Patrick Steward face-palm and say TL;DR - take the time to read it all.

A friendly warning though - don't post in that thread. You may only post here in your own thread. Thanks. ;)

Just make sure you're using condoms correctly and you won't have that fear of breakage hanging over you. Sex is a natural, normal part of life and shouldn't be something to be frightened of. Good luck!

Oh, and I agree with Jeff, just in case you were wondering. You're conclusively hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline terrified204

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Re: freaking out...
« Reply #5 on: June 09, 2013, 12:56:05 PM »
Thank you so much Ann and Jeff!

I have taken the time to read through the thread Ann suggested and through your signature links.  There is a lot of useful information and many things I thought I knew but most certainly didn't! That stroke test is simple, yet a genius idea!

You're right, I shouldn't be afraid of sex... just smart and careful.

Thank you both for your comments.  After so much anxiety, now I feel like singing and dancing in the rain!  ;D 8) :)

Online Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: freaking out...
« Reply #6 on: June 10, 2013, 07:58:35 AM »
terri(nolongerfied),

You're welcome. I'm glad you've learned something - that's why we're here. Don't forget to pay it forward and teach others what you've learned. That's really all the thanks we need.

Have a great life. :)

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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