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Author Topic: born poz, and stright  (Read 2308 times)

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Offline acal78

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  • Posts: 4
born poz, and stright
« on: June 05, 2013, 01:22:53 AM »
Hi, my name is akeem, i am 21 yrs old and have been aids poz since i was born. I guess im writing on here, because i wanted to let some of you know that are poz and straight and young that there are people out there like you. being so young and poz isn't the easiest thing in the world. I have been reading alot of theses post on here and can't relate to hardly any of them bc im no that old in age and im not gay.....having said that i think its been harder for me to talk and relate to most on this site. I grew up in a white community and family, i was adopted when i was an infant.I see the world in a different perspective, i'm black young and live and have lived in white populated areas my hole life. i dont get the being black and gay stigma's at all....Its hard for me to find a romantic relationship bc not only are most of the single young people i meet that are poz most of them happen to be gay. the other problem is finding somone of my age to date. Unlike the majority of people i meet or know i dont know anyone who has had it there entire life from birth. This makes it so had to relate bc i have never know any other way of life but poz. so if theres anybody on here that can relate to me in any way plz let me know,bc it gets fustrating and lonley

Offline joyluckclub

  • Member
  • Posts: 136
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #1 on: June 05, 2013, 10:41:42 PM »


Wow.

I think the 'community' sometimes forgets that there are a diversity of stories and experiences living with HIV.

I have often wondered what life would be like if I were straight and HIV+.

Since I am African American, HIV+, and gay, I can speak to that unique experience.

Though I may have had different experiences than you, the best advice I can give you is:


Keep reaching out to nurture relationships

Have a plan for your life (it will keep you busy and the accomplishments along the way will make life enriching)

Be patient.  This journey is different for everyone.

Keep reading and asking questions in the forums here.  There are straight people here who can give you advice and perspective.

Glad you reached out!
"Honey, be who you is"  Madea.........

Offline mitch777

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,541
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2013, 08:23:23 AM »
Hi Akeem,

Welcome to the forums!
I'm just another middle aged white gay guy but wanted you to know that our differences don't necessarily mean that we can't understand.
The support here is diverse and valuable to all of us.

I'm sure their are many here in their 20's.
I think you will be surprised to see how much support comes your way here.
Sometimes support comes from unexpected sources.

Hope to hear more from you.
By the sound of your first post, you seem like a pretty level headed guy.
Being poz from birth in itself must give you a pretty unique perspective.
Seems to me that your experience has given you an outlook that we all might like to learn from.

Nice to hear from you. :)

m.
31 years hiv+ (oct. 2013) with a curtsy.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2013, 09:25:02 AM »
Hi Akeem, welcome to the forums.

You may be interesting in reading Shawn Decker's blog. He's been hiv positive since he was a little boy, due taking Factor 8 (for hemophilia).

He and his partner Gwen (I can't recall if they're married or not, but they've been together for years) give talks about hiv at schools and various other venues. Gwen is hiv negative.

So there is hope for you, very much so. I think you'll find Shawn's story inspirational and you'll probably find you have a lot in common with him.

Hugs,
Ann
xxx
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline WillyWump

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,184
  • your ramblings bore Yamaguchi Kitteh
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2013, 07:31:10 PM »
Hi Akeem, Welcome!

In regards to advice, Joyluckclub pretty much said it all.

We do have some poz straight males here...Skeebo for one is a gem of a guy. So dont feel alone, at least not on these Forums. Afterall, regardless of age, sex or sexual persuasion we are all very much alike here :) You are among friends and your input is valued here.

Welcome to our home.

-Will
POZ since '08

Last Labs-
6/3/14 CD4- 736, UD 34%
6/25/13 CD4- 1036, UD,
2/4/13, CD4 - 489, UD, 28%

Current Meds: Prezista/Epzicom/ Norvir
.

Offline Jmarksto

  • Member
  • Posts: 509
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2013, 04:19:51 PM »
Hi Akeem;  Another welcome, and thank you for posting. 

The previous posts have captured my thoughts - the only thing I would add is that there are quite a few people that come here to read the posts that have not posted yet -- perhaps because they didn't feel like they were represented here.  Your post will be read by many other people - some of which may have an experience closer to yours, which may inspire them to post....an "wallah" now our community has more people with an experience closer to yours.

In other words, if you continue to participate here I believe you will find others with a more similar experience to yours (in addition to getting support from others with a different experience from yours).

Again, welcome,

JM
03/15/12 Negative
06/15/12 Positive
07/11/12 CD4 790          VL 4,000
08/06/12 CD4 816/38%   VL 49,300
08/20/12 Started Complera
11/06/12 CD4   819/41% VL 38
02/11/13 CD4   935/41% VL UD
06/06/13 CD4   816/41% VL UD
10/28/13 CD4 1131/45%  VL 25
02/25/14 CD4   792/37%  VL UD
07/09/14 CD4 1004/39%   VL UD

Offline acal78

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #6 on: June 07, 2013, 05:18:18 PM »
thank you all for the support! i appreciate  it very much!

Offline MiniPozToyota

  • Member
  • Posts: 206
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #7 on: June 07, 2013, 08:23:02 PM »
Straight and poz and married.... so I know the feeling
April 2010- tested neg.
April 1 2011 -  CD4 346 VL 46856 22%
July 27 2011- Started Atripla
(Meds are good) needed more space to update been UD now for three years. Current down below
Jun 5 2014 - CD4 704 VL UD % 44.0

Offline klassykitty

  • Member
  • Posts: 381
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #8 on: June 07, 2013, 10:46:29 PM »
Welcome Akeem
I am also straight and poz, although I was only diagnosed little more than 2 years ago.
 
A lot of the guys that I date when I tell them about my AIDS think I'm some sort of a hoe or something, and some are ok with it for a while then change their mind, or they say ok but I'd like to be just friends. So sometimes it's not any easier for us older folks either. 


Michelle 8)
How to handle stress like a dog:
If you can't eat it or play with it.....
then pee on it and walk away

Diagnosed 01-20-2011
01-23  CD4 32    VL 125,400
02-18        76     VL 189
03-14  no cd4 test done   VL-52
04-14   69  VL-UNDECTABLE  YEA!!
05-26   50  whoopsy  
06-27   71        %-7
08-15   64 WTF %-9 
10-16  80         %7  
2012  CD4  %Thing   VL-UD
01-18  87    7
04-18  93    8  
07-16  151  8         
10-18  83    9    VL-70
2013   CD4   %thing       VL-UD
01-28  121     9
04-24  148    11   
07-25  157    11   
10-22  185    13
2014   CD-4  %thing   VL-UD
02-07 201 YEA!!!!!!  12
06-03  205      12

Offline Ann

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  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #9 on: June 08, 2013, 08:10:24 AM »
thank you all for the support! i appreciate  it very much!

You're welcome, Akeem. That's what we're here for!

I'm curious - did you check out Shawn Decker's blog I linked you to? I have a feeling he would be happy to have email discussions with you to help you navigate being young, straight and poz. I'm sure you can get in touch with him either through his blog or his website, which is linked to on the left-hand side of his blog.

I know a few straight poz guys and I understand how you likely feel very much in the minority. They are out there though so you're not as alone as you feel. Being poz isn't always a deal breaker and if she's really into you, it won't be. Hang in there!
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #10 on: June 08, 2013, 08:14:15 AM »
PS - I hope you know that as long as you have an UD viral load and no other active STIs, you are going to be very unlikely to transmit your virus to any woman you may have a relationship with. You can even have a family - the old-fashioned way. No need for sperm-washing or any other expensive procedures. You've got a long, bright future ahead of you. Believe it! :)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mpositive

  • Member
  • Posts: 297
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #11 on: June 08, 2013, 11:04:34 AM »
Hi Akeem,

Middle age, white and straight pozzie here.
Stick close to this forum, they really are extremely supportive and helpful. I understand part of what you are dealing with as far as the straight part.  The rest is added to your challenge and I feel for you.
Keep asking questions, keep chatting up folks here and you will find your way always.

Good luck,
:)

Offline acal78

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #12 on: June 10, 2013, 12:01:15 AM »
yes ann i did read it and it has def made me feel better thank you!

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #13 on: June 10, 2013, 09:16:31 AM »
yes ann i did read it and it has def made me feel better thank you!

:)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline betterdaysahead22

  • Member
  • Posts: 31
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #14 on: June 12, 2013, 11:25:05 PM »
I'll one up your minority status - female, single, bisexual, in my 20s and diagnosed less than 4 months ago. Forever aloooone!
Kidding haha but I know how you feel. I joined the personals but it seems mostly to be gay males and straight girls only looking for dates with guys. If you find some sort of forum or site other than this one (which is GREAT by the way, not meaning to disregard such a valuable resource with such wonderfully supportive people) please let me know! :)

Offline acal78

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #15 on: June 13, 2013, 08:26:07 PM »
i will let ya know if i find one and yeah it sucks being a minority....

Offline betterdaysahead22

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  • Posts: 31
Re: born poz, and stright
« Reply #16 on: June 14, 2013, 09:24:34 AM »
Yup lol at least you're a dude haha

 


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