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Author Topic: Hi folks....  (Read 2070 times)

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Offline young89

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Hi folks....
« on: April 24, 2013, 09:57:48 PM »
Well.. I tested positive in January of this year..

I havent told anybody close to me and probably wont...

joined just to talk with like minded people i guess.



Offline Jeff G

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 10,810
  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2013, 10:02:05 PM »
Welcome to the forum Young , sorry you need us but glad you found us . 

Offline young89

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2013, 10:08:46 PM »
thanks for the love..

Offline jaace24

  • Member
  • Posts: 35
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2013, 10:37:03 PM »
You will find lots of information on here.  I was diagnosed in January as well.

Offline onelife

  • Member
  • Posts: 9
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2013, 10:42:32 PM »
Hello young89,

Take your time and tell them when you are ready. I got tested last week and I haven't told anyone either. But if you can talk to a therapist or a social worker, do that. It might help.

Trust me, this is a great resource and the people are very nice and supportive. We all are here to support each other.

Offline Paladin

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #5 on: April 25, 2013, 10:42:30 PM »
I got my results 3 days ago. I think it is hard to even consider telling anyone let alone to actually do it.  I am on here for the same reason, I need to let it out and yet I find that I am holding back here too.  I don't want specifics that could identify me to my partner ( he is on here and pos also). Btw, he knows about me, but I do not want him reading my posts and have him figure out its me.
The past is only meaningful if you have a future

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,242
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2013, 12:47:15 AM »
I don't want specifics that could identify me to my partner ( he is on here and pos also). Btw, he knows about me, but I do not want him reading my posts and have him figure out its me.

Hmm... OK.   He knows you are HIV+ and yet you don't want to discuss HIV and being HIV+ with your partner, who is also HIV+.  May I ask why not?
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2013, 12:56:43 AM »
Hmm... OK.   He knows you are HIV+ and yet you don't want to discuss HIV and being HIV+ with your partner, who is also HIV+.  May I ask why not?

I can understand, actually. What if there are relationship issues that the OP wouldn't otherwise feel free to discuss? What if the OP wants a sounding board to talk about stuff BEFORE he brings it up to the boyfriend? Sites like this aren't exactly replete on the internet, and that can sometimes be awkward.

*modified to add: I am, however, not exactly sure how sustainable that arrangement is going to turn out. Really depends on the partner's curiosity, the OP's sharing, and the issues discussed. I'm pretty sure I couldn't catfish my boyfriend, at least not for a long time.


« Last Edit: April 26, 2013, 12:59:18 AM by jkinatl2 »
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,242
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #8 on: April 26, 2013, 01:04:03 AM »
Oh I can understand a situation like that.  But it might be hard to be incognito on the very same forum as one's partner. 

And as an aside, saying something like "my partner is on here and I don't want him to identify me" - is this strategic for staying incognito...  ???
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Paladin

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #9 on: April 26, 2013, 08:13:27 AM »
It's not a bad situation that wants me to stay anonymous , my partner believes he infected me and he is dealing with guilt over this. It is probable that he did unknowingly infect me and I do have some anger issues over that, but I do not blame him, I just wish he had made better choices.  So I don't want him to read something like this and be 100% certain it is me because the only thing he will see is that I blame him and I don't want him to feel that way.
The past is only meaningful if you have a future

Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,242
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #10 on: April 26, 2013, 08:58:07 AM »
It's not a bad situation that wants me to stay anonymous , my partner believes he infected me and he is dealing with guilt over this. It is probable that he did unknowingly infect me and I do have some anger issues over that, but I do not blame him, I just wish he had made better choices.  So I don't want him to read something like this and be 100% certain it is me because the only thing he will see is that I blame him and I don't want him to feel that way.
I fully empthathize with you. But look, you just spelled it out again, its vey specific, if your love is "here" he'll recognize the similarities, at least.

Perhaps you are doing a sort of virtual, social media "freudian slip" then.  Revealing a key truth or issue, accidentally.

Of course you'll want to settle this with your partner, when the time is right.  I hope it goes well and wish you two the best. 
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline mitch777

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,371
  • wish i were here
Re: Hi folks....
« Reply #11 on: April 26, 2013, 09:00:22 AM »
It's not a bad situation that wants me to stay anonymous , my partner believes he infected me and he is dealing with guilt over this. It is probable that he did unknowingly infect me and I do have some anger issues over that, but I do not blame him, I just wish he had made better choices.  So I don't want him to read something like this and be 100% certain it is me because the only thing he will see is that I blame him and I don't want him to feel that way.

Hi Paladin and welcome to the forums. :)

While I understand the idea here, I would suggest it might be more beneficial to discuss your anger issues with a therapist.
The anonymous concept on an open forum when your partner is here will most likely limit your discussions at a deeper level for fear of him discovering you.
Limited discussion = limited responses.

Anyway, I wish you the best and hope you are able to continue being part of the forums.

m.
31 years hiv+ (oct. 2013) with a curtsy.

 


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