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recently found out

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Hey Elkan!

I teste positive when I was 27. It was 1993, and all the people who went to the clubs with me were dropping like flies. Dropping literally dead. I have no idea, and only a few reasonable guesses why I survived that, survived until 1996 and the "miracle drugs." And I have no real concept why I survived THEM, as the first generation(s) of those drugs were basically field-tested on patients.

But here I am, with mostly internal scars, and on ongoing sense of bafflement about the whole thing.

I am saying this as a preface, and it's not a pronouncement I make lightly - or would have made at all, as recently as five or six years ago.

You are going to be fine.

You will get labs done, get your numbers, get a lot of blood drawn, and then you will wait. Maybe you will need to (or opt to) get on meds now. Maybe you will wait. We have a handful of one pill-a-day combinations, with more looming. Hell, in five years we will likely have pill-a-week, or injection every two weeks (Google Humira for an example.) And by then, a working "cure" might be the next step.

Even if science comes to a crashing halt RIGHT NOW* -- you are still going to be OK.

*note. science is not coming to a crashing halt.

I know that this is tough, this is scary, and the learning curve is temporarily perpendicular. But you can do this. It's no longer baffling why people survive - it's becoming baffling when people diagnosed NOW do not. Throw away all the outdated, obsolete bullshit you have read about HIV.

Read the LESSONS here on this site. First rate, readable, and well written. Also painstakingly researched.

I am not going to say stupid stuff like "don't be scared" and "don't be nervous." HIV is serious shit. But so are a lot of things. You probably do fifty brave things every day without thinking twice about them. You get into a car and drive/ride. You go somewhere public. You/I/we/us, we live on what amounts to an inconsequential planet, orbiting a middle-aged star in a tangential cusp or the arm of one of several loops around one of many million galaxies.

Yet we are here. YOU are here.

And you will be OK.

More importantly, the days you do not feel OK, you will not be truly alone. You've got a treasure chest on this forum full of people who have been (or are) where you have been, who will offer wisdom, advice, strength, hope, and usually at least a little snark to put it all in perspective. PLEASE use this place as the resource that it is. Please listen to the people who offer opinions. Even the prickly ones (and I have been counted among that number.) Often times it's the crusty old battle-axes who will provide the best help.

I do not consider myself a battle-axe, however. So none of that.

There are good people here. And I am certain there are good people where you are as well. We will get through this together.

I've been reading your reply again and again, try to understand everything you say. It is truly a bliss for me to have found this site and got all these positive replies from all these kind souls.
I went to the clinic today, I didn't have the chance to see the doctor though. But i had a discussion with the nurse, basically asked her some of the basic things (like medication coverage, side effects of medicine and etc.). She is nice and I feel like I am in good hands. so i got blood drawn today and awaiting for the results to come back in about two weeks time; hopefully i will not need to be on medication just yet. and yeah, good news is that i think i can get my medication covered by my university insurance plan.
I guess I still need some time for me to get back to normal lifestyle so i expect myself will be emotional once awhile. but I really hope and I am really happy that I can go through all these with you guys. I will keep updated here.
Somehow, it really feels like a rebirth. ???


--- Quote from: gadawg1979 on April 20, 2013, 01:20:01 AM ---Just over a year in here.  Hold on its a wild ride to start but once you get things in line it settles.

--- End quote ---

yeah!! I think I am getting better and better. it's been three weeks since then.

A person diagnosed today, after a recent infection, and in a situation with access to medical care and treatment, is pretty much expected to live a "normal" life span.
The information you took from the Nurse, about "20 years is common" is INCOMPLETE and does NOT apply to you.
You should expect and plan that HIV will not cut short your reasonable lifespan.

Hi Elkan,

I'm one of the old battle-axes (not crusty) here.
(btw great post jk)
30+ years poz (at age 23).

One thing to keep in mind when reading about others health issues here.
Everyone is different in SO many ways... genetics, age, how long they had been infected (without the life saving meds available), mental health, good or bad health habits, etc., etc.
Also, med side effects can vary but the med options keep growing.
The majority do well with little or no side effects.
It may seem like a high percentage have issues with the meds after reading some of the threads here but remember that those who aren't having med side effects (the vast majority) won't be heard from often or at all on the topic.

As for being emotional...
It's part of being human.
I think you have already witnessed a tablespoon of the bowl full of support available here.
It's a BIG bowl. :)

Sounds like you feel comfortable with your health care providers.
Great to hear!!

Welcome! :)



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