Main Forums > Someone I Care About Has HIV

please help us

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worridwife:
Yes he his on atripla n dapsone I give him his Med every day at 8 pm I even cut up the atripla he can't swallow it. Lol. I have not missed a day even when he gets upset that he has to take it or if he has to be woken up I still take his attidude and just give it to him. My feelings are hurt daily but as long as I can keep him on track I will do it but I can't keep it bottled up I need to talk to ppl not just doc the understand or can help me understand
So again thank u

Jeff G:
I'm glad you found us and I want you to know you can always come here and find somebody that cares enough to listen and give you support and advice . Please keep us updated and remember you are not going through this alone .

worridwife:
Thank you all so much.

worridwife:
OK since I just told all my husbands story I would like to ask a question for my self.... I have been very tired for 4 months now I sleeall the time head hurts constantlyalso. Thought it was stress from all this but for the past week I have been coughing n sore throat my body is painful I know 3 test came back neg just the 15min test but I feel as if something is wring with me am I going crazy. I have to go back for a mother test in a month and I don't want to look crazy asking for one now but I really am worried. Can I be pozand not show I had mono years ago n it took 6 blood test to show sorry if I'm a bother now

jkinatl2:
I'll be perfectly frank. If your last test was six weeks past your last episode of unprotected intercourse with your husband, than you can very likely rule out HIV.

But of course things are going wrong. Good God.


You have been doing an INHUMAN amount for your husband. And you deserve a break.

He might need a little caregiving right now, but I have witnessed far worse. People whose family have shunned them. whose lives have been basically forfeit, relying on friends who drop in every other day, and manage with more debilitating circumstances. Your husband has it rich. He has you.

And who, might I ask, do YOU have?

Here's a big secret - and it's from one caregiver to another - YOU need time to yourself. Hours if you must, DAYS if you can. This burden should not be yours alone.

It might be time for some tough live to your husband. He doesn't want his condition to be a public thing, yet he wants YOU to suffer while he refuses to participate in his treatment. I would recommend an ultimatum. He can help, or you can enlist others to help YOU, with full disclosure.

This will break you. It will. You have to get some control back in this situation.

I can tell you love him and are devoted to him. Thing is, does he love YOU? Does he care that he is sacrigicing not only his own well being but YOURS?

HIV is no walk in the park. But it looks as though your husband has every opportunity through insurance and location to get and maintain the help he needs. But at some point, your own survival instinct WILL kick in. You don't want that to be in the middle of a real crisis.

I have read your posts and I feel for the both of you. But he is NOT dying of AIDS. Nor will he, is he takes his meds and sees his doctor. Ultimatum time - if he truly loved you, he would do that. He needs to know it's really that simple. You can NOT become a person who sacrifices her health and her sanity for someone. You will come to resent him, hate him even. And the messed up part about all that is that you will also love him At. The. Same. Time.

Been there.


Look to your community services to find help if you have to.... but look in the mirror to find your strength. It's right there.  You have to take care of yourself even as you take care of him. Before, even.

My heart truly aches for wht you are going through. PLEASE stay connected here.

We're pretty cool folks, though we tend to bicker.

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