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Thoughts On Some Doctors' Biases On Gay/HIV Patients?

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Jeff G:
Dear Robby ... It may be hard to find a proctologist that exudes exuberance when looking at your bunghole ... competence may be all you find .

I have to admit having a doctor peer into the depths of me is a bit unsettling and not my idea of a stress free afternoon , so I do understand you being uncomfortable . 


You seem to be having a lot of anxiety regarding your HPV and anal issues.  It's possible that some of the aloofness you are receiving is because many colorectal specialist are not trained in anal dysplasia.  It's possible you are asking questions outside their expertise.

HRA's (High resolution Anoscopy's) which you have inquired about are only performed at a few medical centers in the country.  Many places don't do them yet. 

Here is a link to every (most all) providers in the United States that perform HRA's.  I don't know where you live but it's possible there is one close to you.  Find the closest one and make an appointment, hopefully there is one in your area.
a lot of the time finding the right specialist is half the battle.

The more I read here I get the feeling that I am lucky to have found the doctor I have.  It was my partner that direct me to him.  He is my HIV, PC and will be doing my HRA next week. My doctor is also gay.

Miss Philicia:

--- Quote from: RobbyR on March 06, 2013, 05:56:38 PM ---
--- Quote from: buginme2 on March 06, 2013, 07:08:10 PM ---Maybe this is a regional thing.  I have always been treated with the utmost respect.  in fact I have noticed when I tell an unfamiliar doctor Im hiv positive I get.better care.

maybe it's because I'm treated at s large urban hospital in a very blue city /state. 

--- End quote ---
albeit in a fairly blue city, but it is still a roll of the dice if specialist care is needed, in regards to finding a provider who is sensitive to gay/hiv related issues. Anyone else have some thoughts on this?

--- End quote ---

This has been my experience over the span of twenty years.

I also think that some patients have such self-loathing that maybe (can't be sure) are reading much more into these supposed negative experiences -- though I won't deny that the occur from time to time, but just not to the extent presented here. Maybe I'm just naive.

For the most part, I've had very good experiences.  I do think there are just many docs, who are aloof.  Many seem to lack common communication skills and act like they've not had much interaction with humans.  Mitt Romney types.  I have a doc in the family.  His sense of humor is very dry, and he can come off very distant.  Well, a fart, in person or on TV, will get him rolling.  He will tell stories he thinks are hilarious.  We all make fun of him.  It takes him ten minutes to tell it, and it is never funny.

I have wondered whether I am paranoid.  I noticed my family doc nurses stopped taking my temp, after my dx.  They had always done it, ever since I first went there in the 90's.  I finally asked.  One nurse said it was to save time, saying if you aren't coming in sick with something, then they aren't doing it.  I was seeing him for my back problems.  I took her word, but I admit I still wonder.  Temp and bp is standard practice at every doc.  Even my dentist does both. 

At the same doc, I mentioned to the nurse that I had a lump on my anus that I was concerned about.  She said he doesn't look at anyone's private parts.  That seemed strange to me.  I thought that is a doc's job, to examine any issue to see whether you need to see a specialist right away.  Again, perhaps I am just paranoid, and most GP's don't look at private parts.  But, they didn't even refer me to a colorectal doc.  I had to find my own.  Luckily, it was just a skin tag. 

Besides that, the HIV pharmacist at my HIV doc said, "When you're out partying and hopping into bed with strange guys, then you can't be surprised you got infected."  Ok, I guess it is true that you shouldn't be surprised, if you are having unprotected sex, with a bunch of strange guys.  But, it was the judgment in her tone.  And, I never said I was dumbfounded, so why go there.  I let it go at the time, but I finally told her how insensitive that remark was.  She didn't know me or know how I was infected.  And, it doesn't matter.  I told her I hope she doesn't treat people differently, depending on how she thinks they were infected, or whether they are straight or gay. 

But, I have still had more positive experiences than negative.  I had a dentist, who would pull off his bloody mask with his bare hands.  One time, he even wiped away some dried blood around my mouth with his bare hand.  I thought I was glad he wasn't skeerd, but I could do without the bare fingers around my 


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