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Author Topic: enlightenment  (Read 1475 times)

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Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
enlightenment
« on: January 08, 2014, 01:35:33 AM »
enlightenment

has happened to me a few times most of the time, barely  noticeable and fleeting

this time in weird dream, about people ascending or changing into plants of all things 

what does this have to do with HIV? religion has no place in this illness ????

sorry just wanted to share my good moment

bad moments are plentiful.

for some of the people who are new to hiv 25 years ago I was very ill found myself in a psych word. ( HIV or not was bound to happen) I told the compassionate understanding considerate orderly ( the guy who wanted more then anything to tie me up and lock me away ) the nurse from one flew over the COCO's nest ( if you are young I strongly advice seeing )

Anyway I told him My Tcells were gone viral load did not exist yet
I explained my situation. He calmly asked if I had life insurance ?

I said yes ( even though I did not, I just said yes cause I was tired of thinking negative)

He said you should sell your life insurance ?

( in other words you goin to die ? )

HAHA I have probably out lived him . well anyway that was like I had said 25 years ago well I probably already posted this but a rewrite might be in order something a bit more up lifting.

enlightenment like  (zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance )
 

some things are nearly impossible to quantify

difficult to define and measure like degrees of happiness or pain


thank you

EM


Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
enlightenment
« Reply #1 on: January 08, 2014, 01:38:28 AM »
enlightenment

has happened to me a few times most of the time, barely  noticeable and fleeting

this time in weird dream, about people ascending or changing into plants of all things 

what does this have to do with HIV? religion has no place in this illness ????

sorry just wanted to share my good moment

bad moments are plentiful.

for some of the people who are new to hiv 25 years ago I was very ill found myself in a psych word. ( HIV or not was bound to happen) I told the compassionate understanding considerate orderly ( the guy who wanted more then anything to tie me up and lock me away ) the nurse from one flew over the COCO's nest ( if you are young I strongly advice seeing )

Anyway I told him My Tcells were gone viral load did not exist yet
I explained my situation. He calmly asked if I had life insurance ?

I said yes ( even though I did not, I just said yes cause I was tired of thinking negative)

He said you should sell your life insurance ?

( in other words you goin to die ? )

HAHA I have probably out lived him . well anyway that was like I had said 25 years ago well I probably already posted this but a rewrite might be in order something a bit more up lifting.

enlightenment like  (zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance )
 

some things are nearly impossible to quantify

difficult to define and measure like degrees of happiness or pain


thank you

EM


Offline Theyer

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,494
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2014, 04:19:52 AM »
Em ,

Reading your post bought to mind " The Battersea Park Road To Enlightenment " by Isabel Losada . I bought coz Batt, Park is in my area usually I run from such books but Ms Losada has a hign London -ish antenna for BS.

Do you know it ?

m
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #3 on: January 08, 2014, 04:24:47 PM »
 enlightenment to me is just feeling good, excepting life as it is and not being down

just my own spin on it. I am sure other people will say being enlightened is nirvana with a very long drown out journey down the eight way path and a whole lot of other stuff added in for good measure. just trying not so much to find short cuts but trying to describe feeling well happy and in a good mood.

I will look up that book and see if it is like other self help books. Or if like other books on the subject long haired hippy stuff or theoretical thesis on the benign

Sorry a bit down right now will try later to be more upbeat

thank you

EM   

Offline Theyer

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,494
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2014, 04:52:46 PM »
No need to apologize , I liked it coz it was hard to categorize and she is a natural born optimist.
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #5 on: January 15, 2014, 01:01:19 PM »
I had woken up in the middle of the night feeling great. Must have forgotten to take my sustiva that I have been taking for about eight years now. I usually wake up in the middle of the night every night feeling like someone has kicked me in the gut. the time about the same time I had woken up feeling filled with happiness instead.

Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2014, 01:09:32 PM »
It was not twenty five years ago in the psych word it was mid nineties about nineteen years ago. just before I started taking liquid norvir. I was told it was caramel flavored it tasted more like tar. Sorry middle of the night feeling great no one to talk to so I wrote about it here. I can not wake up everyone I know just to tell them " hey I am not in pain ". even though I wanted too

thank you
EM

Offline em

  • Member
  • Posts: 99
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #7 on: January 15, 2014, 01:13:26 PM »
Another way to achieve enlightenment is through suffering. 

Thanks again

EM

Offline Fisher

  • Member
  • Posts: 273
Re: enlightenment
« Reply #8 on: January 15, 2014, 08:05:20 PM »
NOT TWO!

And the returning to the present moment, with the hope and faith that all of life, all the great joys and sufferings are just foot steps, at least my passage way, to remembering that life is an ever opening flower, a remembering, fascinating and forever brand new for an eternity, a re-acquaintance to and of the Love that we are. The nature of joy and happiness, our birth right, our being.

But I am a crazy, insane bear. So while my delusion may be valuable for me, it may have little use to others.
- fisher
07/14 CD 391 %20 VL UD
04/14 CD 486 %23 VL <20
11/13 CD 351 %21  VL <20
10/13 CD 390 %16  VL <20
06/13 CD 315 %19  VL  22
02/13 CD 396 %14  VL <20
12/12 CD 392 %13  VL 320
11/12 CD 428 %13  VL 1200
*Started Meds: Atripla
10/12 CD 427 %11  VL 139000 -- 09/12 CD 408 %13 VL 92928
09/11 CD 745 %27 VL CLOT -- 10/10 CD 863 %29 VL 2782
10/09 CD 597 %30 VL 2537 -- 05/08 CD 809 %28 VL 1504
04/07 CD 797 %25 VL 3558 -- 11/06 CD 720 %28 VL 1214
06/05 CD 731 %25 VL 1575 -- 12/04 CD 1176 %30 VL 1329
01/04 CD 959 %26 VL 1011 -- 11/03 CD 1000 %28 VL 1581
12/02 CD 748 %28 -- 10/01 CD 860 %25
08/00 CD 1022 %28 -- 04/99 CD 854 %27
11/98 CD 899 %28 -- 02/97 CD 1400 %37
11/96 CD 1325  VL <500 -- 09/96 Western Blot
05/83 04/98 - Monogamous Partner Being Negative
ARS - Los Angeles Dec '82

 


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