Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits > Mental Health & HIV

Emotional detachment?

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oksikoko:

--- Quote from: Alan_B on February 23, 2013, 04:03:36 PM ---Jus did something huge there (to me). Informed my parents who know that's am gay but we have never talked about it that they will have to meet my partner as he is going to be my plus 1 at my brothers wedding. Really proud of myself :-)

--- End quote ---

Way to go! It gets logarithmically easier with each step after that. For me, after so many years of "outness", the idea of being closeted in any way feels as foreign and unthinkable as the idea of being out used to. I mean, I know you're not closeted, but you're becoming more and more 'yourself' openly.

YellowFever:

--- Quote from: oksikoko on February 23, 2013, 10:54:32 AM ---Emotions get a bad name. I'm a programmer too, by the way (well, a front-end developer [not a designer], so you probably don't count me in this rigid system of left-/right-brain people).

I don't think emotions are the cause of anyone's problems any more than alcohol is the cause of an alcoholic's problems. Alcohol and out-of-control emotions may help reveal underlying problem, but they're rarely *the* problem.

I'm sure there are exceptions.

--- End quote ---

You mean that they are a necessary but insufficient?

oksikoko:

--- Quote from: YellowFever on February 23, 2013, 06:26:07 PM ---You mean that they are a necessary but insufficient?

--- End quote ---

Clever, you. ;) No, I mean uncontrolled emotions are a symptom. Of what? Ask your doctor. ;)

Larsen:
A bit of a left field idea, but have you ever taken a Myers Briggs type personality test?

I've always been a bit, well, shall we say 'different' and seeing an uncannily true reflection of my personality (INFJ) in black and white was astonishingly helpful in pushing me to accept who I am and focus my efforts on what I could actually work on (assertiveness and being more communicative).

Without getting all evangelical about it (which the natural inner sceptic wouldn't allow me to be) it could be worth a dabble.

weasel:

  Hi Al ,
              You seem too young to be joining the lonely hearts club .
   When I was growing up in New York city , early 1970's   , My relationships lasted till breakfast , if he was a class act . If not , I often woke up to an empty bed  :o
 Some of the older guys here remember the Cedar Brook in Westport , CT .  It was a wonderful bar , Tea Dances every Sunday . I had a new lover Every other Sunday .
  When the fountain is full of willing and handsome men it is hard to stay out of the
water , so to speak  :)
  I met up with my husband over 30 years ago .  One look and I was hooked , My dream boat  had landed  :-*
  We have had  many dry spots , and many very active times .  But he is a keeper .
  I am the one that backs off , sometimes for months . I look at my past as as a very fun time , would not have changed a minute of it .
  Today I am HIV / AIDS and my Husband is NEGATIVE !
 For the most part we get along well . ( Today I would like to put a muzzle on him ) :o
 But that is because I feel horrid and he is full of energy .
  I have found therapy to be helpful , But our past makes us who we are and when Mr. right comes along you will most certainly know your time as a whore are over  :-X   

                                                        Weasel

 P.S.  I was granted with a wonderful I.Q. and do not relate to normal people .
        Normal does not work for me  8)  I am the poster child for Emotional detachment

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