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Author Topic: New Living Will Form  (Read 1521 times)

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Offline BooBoo

  • Member
  • Posts: 86
New Living Will Form
« on: October 11, 2006, 11:04:14 AM »
New Living Will Form

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not
wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances
should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who
couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or
lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of
the following:

______a Martini ______a Margarita ______a Scotch and soda ______a Bloody
Mary ______a Vodka and Tonic _______a glass of Chardonnay ______a Steak
______Lobster or crab legs ______The remote control ______a bowl of ice
cream ______The sports page ______Chocolate ______Sex

It should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a
determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and
attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.
At this point, it is time to call the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come
do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their
glasses to toast the good times we have had.

Signature: ___________________________ Date: ___________________________

NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The
patients are happier and they have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't
even need embalming when their time comes. If anyone knows the name of this
happy place PLEASE pass it on!

Offline Teresa

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,754
Re: New Living Will Form
« Reply #1 on: October 11, 2006, 11:12:08 AM »
LOL..That was funny.
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline swede_dish

  • Member
  • Posts: 682
  • I feel like an angel baby wrapped in a candy cloud
    • My blog
Re: New Living Will Form
« Reply #2 on: October 11, 2006, 01:45:45 PM »
Hahahaha that was great. I might print that out...
"I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me. "
-Bette Midler


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