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Odd Cases

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rsquared:
Thanks for your honesty mecch. I'm not sure what test he had done. but I know he went through kaiser. So I'm guessing they've done all the appropriate tests to check and double check their work

magnoman:
For what it is worth I found myself in the same situation as you at the beginning of this year when my partner of 4 years was diagnosed HIV Positive in March... Up until that time we had made condomless love.  This was after what I can only assume was a sero-conversion type illness. (He went to see the doctor who suggested an HIV test).

It was positive, his first Western Blot was negative and his second confirmatory test was positive, which leads me to believe that it was a recent infection.  He had been negative at his last test two years ago.

Fortunately I was negative at the six weeks and four month mark and it has been about 6 months since my last test... I need to go and get retested.

Ultimately whether my bf cheated with me or not, which he denies, doesn't really change anything. 

My guess is that he quite probably did, and denied it as I had always said that if I found out someone cheated on me, I would leave them. Although conceivably he could have been really unlucky and got it from his tattoo or some other unlikely option.

Oddly however my feelings get in the way and I still love him very much.  HIV is just a miserable disease but fortunately it is liveable with now and frankly I don't want to lay any more on him than he already has.

It would be great to have a definitive answer but sometimes sadly it seems that it's not possible to get them!

If it is any comfort I suspect we are much better off being in relationships with someone we know to be positive than having sex with people whos status we do not know one way or another.

Anyway I feel for you and feel free to reach out.  I understand that in the early days of HIV there was much more support out there for  those in sero-discordant relationships than there is now, mainly because it has gone from being 95% fatal to being a completely manageable disease.

However there are  times that I would like to be able to rant about it without giving my partner any grief!

Matty the Damned:

--- Quote from: wolfter on January 11, 2013, 10:07:36 AM ---Perhaps it's time to stop picking up gutter mutts? 

I have never cheated (hence never needed to lie) at any time I was in a relationship. 

Wolfie

--- End quote ---

Relationships with women notwithstanding?

MtD

mecch:

--- Quote from: rsquared on January 11, 2013, 11:17:22 AM ---Thanks for your honesty mecch. I'm not sure what test he had done. but I know he went through kaiser. So I'm guessing they've done all the appropriate tests to check and double check their work

--- End quote ---

Well hang in there.  People are laying out the different scenarios here and hopefully that's helpful.

I guess the ideal is for people who love each other and want to keep the relationship going, to deal with the new normal and move on. 

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