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Author Topic: Rejection, already a life style  (Read 1836 times)

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Offline Nextdoor_guy

  • Member
  • Posts: 82
Rejection, already a life style
« on: October 30, 2012, 12:27:34 PM »
hey guys
so it happened again, 3th time in a row to be rejected over the fact that I am hiv poz.

Dated a guy for about 3 weeks, told him, cuz I don't like to drag things, and.... bye bye. saying also that I should have told him from the beginning and not after so long:o

I am still bit sad and feeling like the last person on earth, but this time I took it better.

how do you deal with this situations?
There's too much confusion.

Offline Jeff G

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  • Member
  • Posts: 11,846
  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #1 on: October 30, 2012, 12:44:46 PM »
It doesn't bother me anymore because I realize that a true connection with some one is a rare thing and there are lots of other valid reasons why others and ourselves are not always meant to be .

Living your life alone until you find someone worthy to let in can be rewarding if you choose to see it that way .


Offline mecch

  • Member
  • Posts: 11,768
  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #2 on: October 30, 2012, 01:36:39 PM »
Sorry about that.

You got balls to keep trying so pat yourself on the back and don't give too much regret to people who DONT have balls to deal with a health issue. 

Also, pay no attention to that guy's criticism that you waited too long... Hahahahaha.  Can you just imagine the "deal breakers" he is hiding from you!!!

Sure rejection sucks.  Its a given that to find a lover you'll have to find one who is OK with your HIV status and a lot won't be and that just the way it is.   But a lot of those lots who can't deal, they probably are rather not long term material anyway.   
ďFrom each, according to his ability; to each, according to his needĒ 1875 K Marx

Offline Buckmark

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  • Would you like to tie me up with your ties, Ty?
    • Henry's Home Page
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #3 on: October 30, 2012, 01:51:51 PM »
hey guys
so it happened again, 3th time in a row to be rejected over the fact that I am hiv poz.

Dated a guy for about 3 weeks, told him, cuz I don't like to drag things, and.... bye bye. saying also that I should have told him from the beginning and not after so long:o

I am still bit sad and feeling like the last person on earth, but this time I took it better.

how do you deal with this situations?

It never feels good to have someone decide to stop seeing you because you are positive.  How do I deal with it?  I remember that this is the other's person's choice, not mine, and therefore it is a reflection on them, not me.  I really don't need someone in my life who can't handle the fact that I'm HIV+.   As a relationship grows there will be additional problems and challenges, which are just a part of life.  If they can't handle HIV, they probably won't deal well with those other problems that inevitably come up.  Do you really want someone who bails at the first sign of a problem or an inconvenience?

As for your guy's comment that you should have told him from the beginning, I have two words for him:  tough shit.  He has both a mind and a mouth, so if this was so fucking important to him, he could have asked you about your status, rather than just (apparently) assume you were negative.  Providing you're not having sex yet, it's your choice as an individual on when to tell people you are HIV+.  Personally, I prefer to do it right up front, and I don't do it in an apologetic way.  If I show someone that I have issues with being HIV+, they'll probably have issues with it too.

Now, on to your next date!

Regards,

Henry

"Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things:
     One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell.
     The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love."
- Butch Hancock, Musician, The Flatlanders

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #4 on: October 30, 2012, 02:47:15 PM »
Why don't you try dating someone you know is already HIV+? There are tons of them.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline anniebc

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  • Posts: 5,941
  • AM member since 2003
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #5 on: October 30, 2012, 05:16:46 PM »
Rejection can be hard, don't give up on having a loving relationship, but don't rush into anything either, there is someone out there waiting for you.

Hugs
Jan
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline MilburnCreek

  • Member
  • Posts: 67
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #6 on: October 30, 2012, 09:33:15 PM »
I hate it.  It sucks.  People stink.   Ignorant, Negative, Gay Guys in particular.

OK, having said that...I have had a partner for two years now...and he is NEG.  He knew I was Poz from the night we met.  We have sex. All the time.  Life is Good. I am blessed and happy.

Life DOES go on....you will have the good fortune of being able to screen out ignorant losers alot quicker :-)

Offline Basquo

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  • Posts: 3,259
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #7 on: October 31, 2012, 09:18:05 PM »
Remember that rejection works bothe ways; you get to do it too. Don't settle for someone just because they don't have a problem with your being positive. Settle for the right one.

Offline Nextdoor_guy

  • Member
  • Posts: 82
Re: Rejection, already a life style
« Reply #8 on: November 01, 2012, 01:48:01 PM »
Thanks guys for all the support, is nice to be around : )
it still sucks cuz usually I fall rerely for someone, but that's life

the problem is that i also live in an area (Mid East) where they still think that you can get HIV by kissing : ))

so I think I would stop dating till I meet the White Knight
There's too much confusion.

 


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