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Disclosing to Parents / Family

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MoltenStorm:
Ok  ;) I don't have to get mah pitchfork now. hehe

Eldon:
David,

When I disclosed, my parents took it well. They reached out to support me about the NOW and the future. My mom didn't care how I got it. She and Dad just accepted it.

David_CA:
Hi all,
Thanks for the responses; they've all been helpful.  Wizzer, thanks for explaining your earlier post.  Molten, I'm glad that pitchfork won't be needed at this point!   

David

otherplaces:

David,

I've said this before, but I want to re-emphasize that you're the crucial part of the equation. We often put other's pain in front of our own. But these are extraordinary circumstances. You're the one in crisis.

My ultra-xtian-conservative parents have been supportive. They won't stop calling me asking how I'm doing. My liberal friends were supportive but now distance themselves from me. You can't predict reactions. But I believe that my decision to tell my parents was for me, not necessarily for them. I just needed it out there whatever the consequences.

My point is that David needs to think about David. :) Because you're important.

much love,
brian

DanielMark:
Hi David,

If you've taken the leap and disclosed by now, I hope it went well.

I struggled with the same decision - for about four years after my diagnosis in 1987 - not so much that I am truly close to any of my family, but because I needed to juggle my desire to be free of another "secret" (= stress) and their ability to handle the news.

They have known Iím Gay since I was 16, so strange news from me was not a factor. LOL

Anyhow, telling them of my status hasnít changed the strained relationships weíve had for ever. But, neither did it do anything to create a bond. They just never want to discuss anything of any significance. To use a much over a used term, yes my family is and has always been dysfunctional. None of them has asked how I became infected and I wouldnít tell them anyway. Itís not relevant to them knowing about me having HIV. Some things are private and weíre all allowed privacy.

I think one thing you have in your favour is your familyís medical knowledge. That has nothing to do with personal emotional response, I know, but hopefully itíll keep minds from imagining the worst sorts of fears.

Wishing you well with your decision,

Daniel

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