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Author Topic: Seriously Worried  (Read 3999 times)

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Offline shatbe

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Seriously Worried
« on: September 15, 2012, 08:19:49 AM »
I kissed a guy eight weeks ago and whilst kissing he accidentally but my tongue; we continued kisisng for about tehn minutes and used tongues.  I have been worried ever since.  When I got home I put tissue at the back of tongue and noticed a small bit of blood.  I had a test just undre two weeks later which was negative and showed the tissue to the nurse who said form what she could see nothing to worry about; she said come back in three weeks i think mainly because she could see I was panicking.  I have been worried and my stomach has been off with the odd bit of pain and runs but I think mainly due to worry.  I saw the guy a few weeks later and he asked if I had been tested and said he had no helath issues (He probably was a bit drunk).  AM I worrying over nothing as others say; my weight has not gone down and I was doing slim fats when this happened too.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #1 on: September 15, 2012, 08:21:50 AM »
You don't have an HIV concern.

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2012, 08:30:46 AM »
Is there any risk at all; I am a man and he was a man too?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2012, 08:36:45 AM »
No risk what so ever.

HIV is transmitted by;
Unprotected penetrative anal and/or vaginal sex
Sharing works with other IV drug abusers
Mother to child

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #4 on: September 16, 2012, 05:27:59 AM »
The fact the health worker said come back in three weeks maybe she was saying for my own peace of mind because she could see I was panicking; i also wonderd if he was bleeding which of cousre I did not see; am I woryring over nothing?  There was no evidence he was bleeding.  When it happened I wondered if I felt my blood but finished my vodka after the kiss and when I got homenoticed on the sceond attempt of tissue the blood.

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #5 on: September 16, 2012, 08:19:11 AM »
shatbe,

Unless you're in the habit of repeatedly punching a person in the mouth before you kiss them (or before they blow you), there could not possibly be enough blood present to cause concern.

Kissing is absolutely NOT a risk for hiv infection and it doesn't matter if you're kissing another man, a woman or a donkey. NO RISK. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect. Not one person has EVER been infected through kissing and you aren't going to be the first.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST SPECIFICALLY OVER KISSING, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

By the way, if you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Do NOT use Private Messages to question other members about any transmission, testing or symptom issues. These issues must be discussed in the public forum. Misuse of the PM function in this manner will result in your PM privileges being removed without warning.


I have removed your PM privilege.

Ann



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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #6 on: September 19, 2012, 04:01:55 PM »
Thank you Ann and sorry for using the PM system; I do suffer from anxiety and do worry far too much about these things?

Are you definitely saying then no need to worry and no need for a test after twelve weeks; I did have some pains in stomach and the runs but I believe that is because I have been worrying?

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #7 on: September 19, 2012, 04:40:26 PM »
If anyone can give me peace of my it will stop me worrying and help my anxiety; sorry to keep going on.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #8 on: September 19, 2012, 06:15:13 PM »
If anyone can give me peace of my it will stop me worrying and help my anxiety; sorry to keep going on.

Just tell us what you need to hear. We have already told you that kissing is not a risk for HIV.

As a matter of fact, if you wear a condom for penetrative anal and vaginal sex, and don't share IV drug needles, you can pretty much cross HIV off your list of things to worry about.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #9 on: September 20, 2012, 01:04:52 AM »
Thank you as I say I do suffer from anxiety. As previously mentioned after the tongue bite we still continued kissing for around ten minutes or even longer and used tongues does this matter. I want to avoid having another test.

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #10 on: September 20, 2012, 02:53:58 AM »
Also just to add I have had a sore throat on and off but again that could be anything.

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #11 on: September 20, 2012, 07:27:48 AM »
Shatbe,

Yes, we know you bit your tongue. Kissing is NOT a risk for hiv infection regardless of how much you chew on your tongue.

Suffering from this level of anxiety is not something you have to put up with. I suggest you find a therapist or counselor with whom you can work though this useless, irrational fear of hiv. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #12 on: September 20, 2012, 08:33:59 AM »
Thanks Ann it was the other guy who accidentally bit my tongue; the only other thing is when I had a test two weeks later which was nagative they said about comoing back in three weeks; they may have been because I was worried; should I try and forget?

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #13 on: September 20, 2012, 09:07:22 AM »
Shatbe,

Of course you should forget about it and move on with your life. It doesn't matter who bit your tongue, it's still not a risk.

How many times do you need to be told that not only is saliva NOT INFECTIOUS, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect?

Again, I suggest you seek counseling to help you get past these irrational fears. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #14 on: September 21, 2012, 10:25:34 AM »
Thanks Ann,

Looks like I will have to try and put all behind me if I can and control the anxiety; I am sure if any of you thought I should be tested again you would have said.  I have to believe in myself I have nothing to worry about.

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #15 on: September 21, 2012, 10:55:08 AM »

 I am sure if any of you thought I should be tested again you would have said.


Of course we would have. We want people to accurately know their status and you already do. You're hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #16 on: September 21, 2012, 10:56:00 AM »
Thank you :) and soryr to keep going on.

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #17 on: September 21, 2012, 12:30:38 PM »
Of course we would have. We want people to accurately know their status and you already do. You're hiv negative.

Ann

As long as definitely sure hopefully I can be ok

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #18 on: September 22, 2012, 04:12:05 AM »
Why I am still worrying I don't know. You all know what you are talking about and I just panic.

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #19 on: September 22, 2012, 07:22:56 AM »
shatbe,

You know what? If you can't bring yourself to believe us and put this behind you, then go test again. Test until the cows come home. You're going to continue to test hiv negative because YOU DID NOT HAVE A RISK!!!

I hope you realise that even though you've paid a subscription to this site, you are still subject to our posting rules.

If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #20 on: September 24, 2012, 09:54:48 AM »
Thank you Ann and soryr for goiong on the way I have.

One final question; if the guy kissed me on a possible sore that was bleeidng is that a concern; again may be my imagination; he put his hand on it it is above my bottom.

Sorry for going on and I am consulting my doctor about anxiety.

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #21 on: September 24, 2012, 12:59:17 PM »
Shatbe,

You did NOT have a risk for hiv infection and your latest details don't change that fact.

I'm giving you that time out you've been warned about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried. No longer worried.
« Reply #22 on: October 26, 2012, 04:46:06 PM »
A final message from shatbe. I want to thank Ann and all the other people on this Forum who gave advised me. It was not that I didn't believe any if you. I worry too much and my anxiety also took over. I did have the test and I am negative. The only thing wrong with me is I worry far too much. I am now in Manchester in the village having a good time and thank you to you all. If ever I can help anyone not to worry please let me know. Thank you all again. Ben

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #23 on: October 27, 2012, 10:33:49 AM »
Last night whilst out a guy in the toilet touched my penis which ok is no issue. I then wondered if he gave me a blow job or kissed it but I have no recollection of it to say if he did or didn't. I  do not believe he gave me a blow job. My penis does have a couple if sores on it anyway from wear and tear and I would not normally have any unprotected oral sex. Do you think it is my anxiety playing again or something I need to get tested for although may not have happened anyway?

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #24 on: October 27, 2012, 10:57:37 AM »
Ben,

When I read your message from last night saying you were in Canal street, well, I just knew you were going to turn up here today with another NO RISK situation.

Getting a blowjob, with or without a condom, with or without sores on your penis, is NOT a risk for hiv infection.

Re-read your entire thread. We've already explained to you what you need to know about hiv transmission.

USE CONDOMS FOR ANAL OR VAGINAL INTERCOURSE, CORRECTLY AND CONSISTENTLY, AND YOU WILL AVOID HIV INFECTION. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #25 on: October 27, 2012, 11:01:53 AM »
Thanks Ann. It may not have happened anyway as I do not recollect it. Sometimes my Penis sores have bled slightly but hopefully as you say no cause for panic.

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #26 on: October 27, 2012, 11:18:38 AM »
Just one final point then to ease completely. If there was a bit if blood on the sore which I am not saying there was. No need to panic?

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #27 on: October 27, 2012, 12:37:53 PM »
Ben,

Why should you panic WHEN YOU HAD NO RISK???

You're quickly heading for a second time out.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #28 on: October 28, 2012, 05:15:44 AM »
Want to ask a final question this may risk a second time out but please answer. If I did gave oral sex and the sores were bleeding slightly would you advise I go for PEP Treatment just to be on the safe side or am I going too far. As stated before although u may have a vision of something whether drunk or not I would not have unprotected oral sex as I know I panic especially after recent events. I know he touched me with his hand but I know something caused me to panic after leaving the toilets. Irony think I remember being sucked but unsure and when I saw him later he asked how much I would pay for a blow job. I may be worrying over nothing but something made me worry.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #29 on: October 28, 2012, 07:07:27 AM »
What part of you never had an exposure is it you do not understand. nPEP is totally out of the question.

Offline shatbe

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #30 on: October 28, 2012, 02:01:33 PM »
Thanks all I will see if I can try and forget about it; but something frightened me the other night; I wonder what it was?

Offline Ann

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #31 on: October 28, 2012, 02:28:47 PM »

but something frightened me the other night; I wonder what it was?


It was your own over-active imagination and paranoia scaring you.

I suggest you seek counseling to get to the bottom of your sexual paranoia. We cannot help you with that here.

I'm giving you that second time out you've been warned about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline shatbe

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STD Anxiety
« Reply #32 on: September 19, 2013, 03:05:48 PM »
Hi All,

My story is long but hopefully you will stay with me.

May 2012 I went to a sauna and all I did was kiss another man (Nothing wrong there).  After leaving the sauna and saying all is ok I started worrying later that night thinking the guy had sucked my penis.  The worry stopped but a few weeks later started again and so much so I knew I would have to have a HIV Test for peace of mind.

Just before the twelve weeks were up I was out in a guy bar and kissed a guy and he accidentally bit my tongue.  I was convinced I had got HIV.

To cut this part short all tests were negative.

On the day I got the negative result I was out again in the toilets of a gay bar and a guy asked I was gay and I said yes - he then touched my penis with his hand and later I was panicking again - had he sucked it.  Again all tests negative including Hepatitis after 21 weeks.

I then went out again and had a few drinks and nipped to the toilet and the following day panicked again - had someone sucked my penis - they even checked CCTV where urinals are screened but it would show if anything had happened.  It again after 90 days showed negative but ghonorreah was picked up (I think that was dorment after three or four years when I was unaware Oral sex was dangerous unprotected).

When I went to the clinic two weeks later for my urine test to confirm the ghonorreah had gone a guy came up to me and said is it not open yet and I said no.  I then started panicking again had he given me anal or oral sex?  Tow days later for Manchester Pride I went to the toilet (Sober) and halfway through panicked again had something happened - i remember my hands maybe being off the penis when panicking - CCTV confirmed for this toilet incident no need to panic.  A few days later when in another bar I was sat down and a guy came over asking me if I wanted to join him and two ladies in another gay bar - I said no.  He had reached under me to shake my hands and although I said to myself no need to panic I was then worrying again.

These last three incidents involving the clinic, toilet and hand shake only happened three and four weeks ago.  I am worrying again - it could be my anxiety.  I worry if saliva from me goes anywhere in case I am passing on HIV or Hepatitis if there was blood in it from cleaning my teeth. 

I am probably going over the top - I don't want unprotected sex but keeping worrying I am doing it.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Seriously Worried
« Reply #33 on: September 19, 2013, 03:14:27 PM »
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


There are no third time outs so unfortunately you are banned for life , do not attempt to create another account . Get the mental health care that you need , we cant help you.

 


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