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Author Topic: just got the call  (Read 8164 times)

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Offline chm02

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  • Posts: 145
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just got the call
« on: September 30, 2006, 06:30:52 PM »
Hi forum.

I posted in the "Am I Infected" forum several weks ago, after having a mystery illness that looked a lot like ARS.
My Dr. just called me to tell me I am hiv positive.
I had a month to think about this, sort of reconcile with myself. I am not surprised; I am sure i will be getting depressed about it soon enough. Posting the info here was my planned 'first thing to do'; cuz I know i will need all the moral support i can drum up. He said my CD4 count was 514, and my viral load was 29K. He said these were not bad numbers for someone who just went through ARS.
Any hellos or feedback appreciated.
Take care
chm

Offline kentb

  • Member
  • Posts: 75
Re: just got the call
« Reply #1 on: September 30, 2006, 07:38:41 PM »
Hi CHM, I am sorry you tested positive for HIV.  I was in your position 6 yrs ago and I can tell you that things are going to be okay.  You will need to find the inner strength to remind yourself that you are only human and that there is no value in beating yourself up over this.  There will be good days and challenging days but you can know that there are lots of people who have been through just about anything you might encounter and that helps.  I might also say that while you might be an emotional wreck right now you might want to really consider carefully who you share information with.  Not all reactions will be one of compassion,  but at least people in society are a lot more accepting of this disease today than ever before.   
Best Wishes,

Kent

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 24,393
Re: just got the call
« Reply #2 on: September 30, 2006, 08:47:53 PM »
Hi CH,

I'm glad you found your way here. Sorry to hear about your news.

Just know that it's going to take some time for you to get adjusted to this. From what you have written it seems you were already expecting this but of course actually being told is still a wham when you get it.

Please read the lessons about testing positive, meds and disclosure issues, among others on this site which may be helpful to you.

For now it's important to have a doctor who's going to monitor your numbers and with whom you can form a good working partnership.

Remember you are always welcome here to ask questions or to discuss anything that's on your mind.

Hang in there. HIV is a big thing but it is not all that your life is or will be about, no matter how large it may loom at this moment.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline J.R.E.

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,099
  • Joined Dec-2003 Living positive, since 1985.
Re: just got the call
« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2006, 08:46:52 AM »
Hello CHM,


Welcome ! I am sorry you tested positive, But Like the others, I am glad that you found your way here. I think you will find a great support base here, and without a doubt a lot of knowledge, that will help you begin this journey of living with HIV.

I was diagnosed positive back in 1985, I remember the first year being quite rough, but with good friends, an excellent partner, and a loving family , I managed to pick myself up, get myself together and decided to get moving on, and living and enjoying life.

I know you may not feel that way right now, But in time, and understanding that this is not the "end of the world", you will manage to survive.No one will tell you that things will be easy, but you will be able to travel this journey, if you keep yourself level headed, and keep yourself focused, and keep yourself realistic, and above all hopefull !!

Your numbers are still very good, you may not need to begin medication anytime soon. Read up on the lessons, education is the key, to living with this virus.Ask questions, when you have them... Don't hesitate to do this. Don't be afraid to ask your doctor questions!! He isthere for you. Don't expect to learn everything in a week !! I 've been living with this virus for 21 years, and there is still so much that I don't always understand. Take a little at a time. And yes, things will be OK...






Take care of yourself-------Ray
« Last Edit: October 01, 2006, 08:49:14 AM by J.R.E. »
Current Meds ; Viramune, Epzicom, 40mg of simvastatin, 12.5mg of Hydrochlorothiazide.
Metoprolol tartrate 25mg



http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=40802.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=45159.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39722.msg495621;topicseen#msg495621

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=46806.0

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=39414.msg491701#msg491701


 In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started my first  HAART regimen  on October 24th,03.

 As of 6/4/14,  t-cells are at 423, Viral load <40

 Current % is at 13% 

  
 62 years young.

Offline chm02

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  • Posts: 145
    • id est
Re: just got the call
« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2006, 03:40:06 PM »
Thanks for your replies Ray, Andy, Kent.  I went out last night and got rip-roaring drunk. Probably not the most creative way to handle it, but I really wanted to blot it all out for a while. I need to quit smoking.  Maybe this news is just what i need to get a handle on some of my more self-destructive behaviors. Maybe not. Who knows.

Offline Life

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,388
  • Member 2005
Re: just got the call
« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2006, 04:31:19 PM »
Sorry about the hiv thing..  Its a bummer.. But you know.. There are alot of other things alot worse.  Count your blessings.  Your numbers are in good shape so you wont have to jump right into anything for quite awhile.  You can work on the acceptance portion of this little protien problem and get comfortable with that first.   Work with your ID Doc and let them help you through these Q & A times.   

You are in the absolute best position you can be for on-line support.   Keep posting, keep telling us how you feel.  And be sure to actually feel.  Don't blind yourself for to long with booze.   I would imagine your doc will tell you to "smoke it up" for now.  Dont try and fix all those habits today or even in the next year......

Love

Online Matty the Damned

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  • Ninja Please
Re: just got the call
« Reply #6 on: October 01, 2006, 09:10:16 PM »
Chm,

Welcome! I'm sorry to hear that you've graduated to the poz only forums. What a bastard. The only things I can think to say to you at the moment are:

1. You are not alone;

and

2. This will be ok.

Fondly,

MtD

Offline Eldon

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,664
Re: just got the call
« Reply #7 on: October 01, 2006, 09:11:25 PM »
Hello Chm02, it is Eldon.

I hope you have recovered from your hangover. It is unfortunate that you have tested positive. However, it is a good thing that you DO know now so that you can take action with your health. Please DO listen to your Doctor's advice. If you are not sure or comfortable with it, by all means please DO seek other professional opinions. In the interim, you DO want to get on some sort of multi-vitamin regimen, change your eating diet, continue with your exercise, drink plenty of fluids, build you a strong support system, and more importantly get your proper rest.

I wish to extend to you a warm WELCOME to the forums. As you have read, you will find understanding, communication, support, some cries, some laughter, and many of your questions answered relating to HIV/AIDS. Here there is a lot of information for you at your disposal. We have a great group of individuals here who will listen and answer you. Due to the news you have discovered, I'm quite sure that there is a lot on your mind. Please DO feel free to come and vent here from time-to-time.

Again Welcome! and make the BEST of each Day!

Offline Longislander

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,486
Re: just got the call
« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2006, 10:01:14 PM »
Hi CHM, welcome. Sorry about the test results. I tested positive last December, but didn't find this place until a couple of months ago. I'm glad you found it sooner. Read alot of what goes on in here. You'll read good and bad, but you'll see that life does go on. Your #s' are good. Most important is to find a doc you're comfortable with. Decide carefully who to tell, if you feel the need to tell anyone at all right now. I wish you the best with everything, take things slow.

Paul
infected 10/05 diagnosed 12-05
2/06   379/57000                    6/07 372/30500 25%   4/09 640/U/32% 
5/06   ?? /37000                     8/07 491/55000/24%    9/09 913/U/39%
8/06   349/9500 25%              11/07 515/68000/24     2/10 845/U/38%
9/06   507/16,000 30% !          2/08  516/116k/22%    7/10 906/80/39%
12/06 398/29000 26%             Start Atripla 3/08
3/07   402/80,000 29%            4/08  485/undet!/27
4/07   507/35,000 25%            7/08 625/UD/34%
                                                 11/08 684/U/36%

Offline chm02

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  • Posts: 145
    • id est
Re: just got the call
« Reply #9 on: October 02, 2006, 04:00:06 AM »
hi guys,
I appreciate the welcomes and kind words of support.  I want to share what's happened recently:
Last Friday I met a guy that i had been chatting with online. We had a great time together, and did the wild thing very enthusiastically Friday night. Then, Saturday (only yesterday?!) I got the call from the doctor.
I saw my friend again tonight, and I had to tell him what was up. It was difficult, but I knew I had to.
We walked and talked after dinner for a long time.
The upshot: Our friendship will survive. I really like this guy.  :)
later,
cm

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 24,393
Re: just got the call
« Reply #10 on: October 02, 2006, 09:26:41 AM »
CM, your actions in reaction to the news are not unusual.

Quitting smoking might be a good idea but I would caution you against taking something like that on just now. You need some time to get accustomed to the news and deal with it without adding the pressure of giving up smoking.

You actually don't have to rush into doing anything for the timebeing. It is good to have a doctor who's going to monitor your numbers. That should be a priority. But otherwise I suggest giving yourself time to absob this news.

And make sure if you're having sex that whoever is pitching is always wearing a latex condom.

Stay in touch and let us know how things are going.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline chm02

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  • Posts: 145
    • id est
Re: just got the call
« Reply #11 on: October 02, 2006, 09:18:14 PM »
Quote

Stay in touch and let us know how things are going.

Cheers,

I'm going nucking futs over here. The realization of this crap is starting to eat my brain.

Offline Life

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  • Posts: 2,388
  • Member 2005
Re: just got the call
« Reply #12 on: October 02, 2006, 09:25:14 PM »
Describe what your brain "tastes like". ;)

Offline chm02

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Re: just got the call
« Reply #13 on: October 02, 2006, 09:43:47 PM »
like burnt hair
 :P

 :D

Offline allopathicholistic

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  • Posts: 3,258
Re: just got the call
« Reply #14 on: October 02, 2006, 09:50:51 PM »
He said my CD4 count was 514, and my viral load was 29K. He said these were not bad numbers for someone who just went through ARS.
Any hellos or feedback appreciated.
Take care
chm

hi chm. he's right and we're here for you. this site is like an education in of itself ... and oh so hilarious, lots of characters  :D  :D

Offline Life

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,388
  • Member 2005
Re: just got the call
« Reply #15 on: October 02, 2006, 09:51:16 PM »
Well, I would first advise you to try the "wet look".  Its in fashion these days.. Blow drying is no way to deal with hiv...  Things take time to process...  The more you tell us about whats going on, the better.   That way, we can steer you around some of these brain obsticles....

Offline Eldon

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  • Posts: 2,664
Re: just got the call
« Reply #16 on: October 02, 2006, 10:27:58 PM »
Hello Chm02,

Don't be so hard on yourself. Take each step one day at a time. It is a positive thing that you told your partner that you are HIV positive. It is also good that you are friends and communicating with one another, you DO need it to be a part of your support system.



Make the BEST of each Day!

Offline chm02

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Re: just got the call
« Reply #17 on: October 03, 2006, 04:26:20 AM »


 It is also good that you are friends and communicating with one another, you DO need it to be a part of your support system.

Make the BEST of each Day!

Thanks Eldon.  He went to the clinic this A.M. and they put him on the prophylactic drugs. We met again tonight, and he is understanding and mature about it. Mostly, I just think it's great that they guy still wants to hang around. :)

Online Matty the Damned

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Re: just got the call
« Reply #18 on: October 03, 2006, 09:41:26 AM »
CHM,

I hate to ask, but you have had your confirmatory test, haven't you?

MtD

Offline chm02

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  • Posts: 145
    • id est
Re: just got the call
« Reply #19 on: October 03, 2006, 11:20:45 AM »
yeah, Matty. They did both tests, and the hiv RNA count, before notifying me.

 


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