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Author Topic: Please can you offer me advice?  (Read 1693 times)

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Offline worried_confused

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  • Posts: 7
Please can you offer me advice?
« on: May 07, 2012, 04:33:43 PM »
I am very worried.  I met up with an old friend and we ended up doing the following:

He gave me a blow job
He fingered me anally

I worry if there was any precum and it was on his finger(s) and what if I had a cut/tear in my anal area?

I am very anxious and woudl like some help.  he told me that he is 'clean' etc but I cant help but worry.

He didn't cum until after all this and then it was only on himself I think.  We didn't do anything else.  Can you tell me if I have put myself at risk of HIV?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Please can you help me?
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2012, 04:48:46 PM »
Nothing you are reporting having done sexually put you at risk for HIV. Receiving  oral is one of the most common of sexual activities. In the entire history of the epidemic there has never been a confirmed case of transmission to a guy in that manner. You are not going to make history by becoming the first.

Being fingered, even with some sperm on his fingers would not be a risk. HIV is a very fragile virus and is not transmitted in that manner.

The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Use condoms everytime for those activities and you will be well protected.

This time there is no cause for concern nor any need for HIV testing on your part. Get on with your life. 
Andy Velez

Offline worried_confused

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Re: Please can you help me?
« Reply #2 on: May 07, 2012, 05:26:52 PM »
Thank you for your reply Andy,
I just wanted to talk to someone about this, that's all.
I feel very alone and worried.  I have booked an appointment for other STIs and will talk things over again when I go see them.

Offline worried_confused

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Re: Please can you help me?
« Reply #3 on: May 07, 2012, 06:03:49 PM »
Also, there was a girl I had sex with quite a while ago but in the last year.  When we were having sex the condom rode up my penis quite a bit.  It didn't come off and expose the end of my penis.  What are your views on this please?

Offline worried_confused

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  • Posts: 7
can you help me?
« Reply #4 on: May 07, 2012, 07:12:20 PM »
Also, there was a girl I had sex with quite a while ago but in the last year.  When we were having sex the condom rode up my penis quite a bit.  It didn't come off and expose the end of my penis.  What are your views on this please?

Offline jkinatl2

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  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: can you help me?
« Reply #5 on: May 07, 2012, 07:40:00 PM »
As long as the tip of your penis was covered you were not at risk for HIV in the incident you described.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Please can you help me?
« Reply #6 on: May 07, 2012, 09:11:06 PM »
As long as the head of your penis remained covered, you were not at risk.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please can you help me?
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2012, 06:42:41 AM »
WC,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep everything in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.




Nothing you describe has been a risk for hiv infection. You do not need to test for hiv over getting a blowjob, fingering or being fingered, or protected intercourse.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried_confused

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #8 on: May 08, 2012, 08:28:34 AM »
I know that I have posted only a short time ago about the encounter I had with an old friend (another guy).

He went down on me and he put a finger(s) in me.

I was worried about the risks of HIV and I am also worried if I had a tear in the anal area. 

I did not do anything to him other than matsurbate him.  He came after I did and I think he also lubrictaed his fingers with saliva as well.

It is the tear idea that is bothering me as I have had soem discomfort down there which I have been to the Doctor about and they did a rectal exam.  They didn't mentino anything about a fissure or tear.  I am just so worried.

Can you offer me advice please?

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #9 on: May 08, 2012, 08:43:53 AM »
Worried,

This is the second time I've had to merge your threads on one day. Get with the program already!

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Continue disregarding our posting rules at your peril.

Thank you for your cooperation.




We've already told you that you have not had  a risk for hiv infection and your added details do not change that one bit.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried_confused

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #10 on: May 09, 2012, 06:21:37 AM »
I am still very worried and I am sorry to keep questinoing you.  I also am sorry if I got the thread thing wrong again!

When I go for my health screen, what is the quickest time in which you can have the 4th generation test that tests for antibodies and antigens (I think I got this right?)

I am having terrible anxiety, I also need someone to talk to.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #11 on: May 09, 2012, 06:42:39 AM »
I am still very worried and I am sorry to keep questinoing you.  I also am sorry if I got the thread thing wrong again!

When I go for my health screen, what is the quickest time in which you can have the 4th generation test that tests for antibodies and antigens (I think I got this right?)

I am having terrible anxiety, I also need someone to talk to.
I suggest you seek help for your anxiety, because you don't have an HIV concern and you don't need testing.

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #12 on: May 09, 2012, 08:29:32 AM »
Worried,

As Rodney says, you don't need to test over being fingered, or giving or receiving handjobs. When someone fucks you without a condom on, or when you fuck someone else without a condom on, then and only then will you have a reason to be worried.

But you've learned how to stay hiv negative and you aren't going to be fucking or getting fucked without a condom - right? That's seriously all you need to do to remain hiv negative.

I've said it probably millions of times by now... use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!!!

Ann



BTW, if you're offended my my use of the word fuck, well, fucking excuse me!!! It's just one of those days.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried_confused

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #13 on: May 14, 2012, 02:38:03 PM »
I woudl like to ask another question please.

I don't recall this but what if his cum got on to my penis?  He didn't cum until after me and I dont think he touched my penis after that but could be wrong?  Please can you let me know what your thoughts are about his cum being on ANY part of my penis?

Thank you.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Please can you offer me advice?
« Reply #14 on: May 14, 2012, 02:45:02 PM »
No risk.

HIV is unable to reproduce outside its living host (unlike many bacteria or fungi, which may do so under suitable conditions), except under laboratory conditions; therefore, it does not spread or maintain infectiousness outside its host.

 


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