Quantcast

Subscribe to:
POZ magazine
E-newsletters
Join POZ: Facebook MySpace Twitter Pinterest
Tumblr Google+ Flickr MySpace
POZ Personals
Sign In / Join
Username:
Password:
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
August 30, 2014, 06:20:34 PM

Login with username, password and session length


Members
  • Total Members: 23350
  • Latest: Smasher
Stats
  • Total Posts: 636681
  • Total Topics: 48324
  • Online Today: 179
  • Online Ever: 585
  • (January 07, 2014, 02:31:47 PM)
Users Online

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Author Topic: 3/24/12 Surgery ...infectious diseases doctor blurts...you have HIV...  (Read 4256 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline PAGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 16
She then turned and walked away...that was kinda..is abrupt the right word? (ha)..I feel so cheated...no pamphlet with smiling happy couples with gaybies...come to think of it I never got the coming out toaster oven...anywho...admit it...the gay world never wanted me...just like Mom...only kidding, mom loves me dearly ...I can see that humor is going to be helpful..

Some questions...nerves and anxiety...doc has me on Xanax and it helps....but much shorter intervals than recommended  Rx Says every 8.. Wears off after 3.   Very low dose .25...not sure if ok to take more frequently as needed...it is the only thing stopping the overwhelming panic attacks/appetite loss/frequent draining of the main vain...thoughts?

Some preliminary observations...some posts should come with a Debbie Downer disclaimer (whah whaa)...this should be uplifting and compassionate as possible.  I am not saying they needn't exist...I just don't want to read em 3 weeks out.  It will take time (the most valuable thing we have).

Scared to reveal my numbers just yet, but very low cd4 and very high vl dr says they will drop 90% in the first month of my altripla, Bactrim, zirythromycin cocktail...2 days in...have great faith in em...didn't get any vivid dreams...want em though...

Love reading the edge off the brink and surviving stories...keep em coming!

Lastly, these posts will become more standard and funny but this is my first blog post ever...bear with me and wish me luck....it is a battle I am going to fight and win...ambien is kicking in....browse around and then off to bed...love you all...one last thing...

I have this incredible urge to just platonically sleep next to some one hugging...weird?  I can fly anywhere...hint hint...
March 2012---tested positive
Started Atripla, Batrim DS, Amoxycillan
April 2012---cd4 49, vl 2,000,000
June 2012---cd4 296, vl 1294
Discontinued Batrim DS and Amoxycillan
Sept 2012---cd4 300, vl UD
March 2013---cd4 308, vl 53...minor blip! Cd%26
Switched to Complera

Offline MarkB

  • Member
  • Posts: 292
Hi PAGuy and welcome: I'm glad you found your way here.

First things first: there is a wealth of information available to you on this forum. Take a moment to read the introductory sections about HIV; also, there are some very wise people here who will do their best to answer the questions which you no doubt have. Let us know how we can help.

I was struck by what you said about your doctor giving you the result, then turning and walking away. Something similar happened to me when I was diagnosed, and I suspect that most of us can resonate with your feeling of how abrupt that moment is. We, however, aren't going to walk away from you. I promise. We won't only "bear with you" and "wish you luck", we will walk alongside you.

You spoke of the overwhelming panic attacks and other things which you are experiencing. While this is an understandable response to what has happened, believe me when I tell you that you can trust what your doctor has said about the meds: your viral load will come down, and you will be OK. As you say, it takes time to adjust. But you are right: this is a battle you are going to win; however dark things seem right now, you will come through it.

I don't know how it is for you, but when I was diagnosed HIV was the first thing I thought of in the morning, and the last thing I thought of at night. I understand completely what you said about wanting someone there just to hold you, to tell you it's going to be OK. I can't hold you, but I can reach out: you are not alone with this, and you never have to be. Where I am, it's 4.51 in the morning and I want you to know that I'm thinking of you.

Wiser heads than mine will be along shortly, so please tell us whatever is on your mind, and ask whatever you need to.

Hugs and kindness,

Mark









« Last Edit: April 14, 2012, 12:06:53 AM by MarkB »

Offline zach

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,388
  • not fade away
hey paguy, welcome to the forum.   :D

your doctor could have handled it better for sure. but even under the best of circumstances, bad news is bad news. the good news is, you're going to be ok. sorry to say, there is no red carpet welcoming you to the world of hiv. but what you will always get here is a warm greeting, and plenty of unconditional support and sound advice from people that have lived it. listen to the long term survivors, theres alot you can learn from them.

your humor will prove invaluable, sometimes i have to laugh through my tears. it helps. but as far as having to read posts that are downers? hey man, some people come in here hurting bad, and sometimes this is the only place they have to turn. there may come a day when you need to spill your pain, i promise you it will be met with kindness and understanding.

xanax, ambian, etc... do what you need to stay sane and contained while you come to terms with your new reality. take it easy on the drugs though, i got carried away with the ambian. no judgement, just sayin. ymmv

don't be scared to share anything you need to. numbers aren't written in stone, and yours will improve.

one last thing, you're in aviation? same here. i'm not a snuggler though  :-*









Offline Peacock

  • Member
  • Posts: 72
OMG, I hope youve got another doctor, that one doesnt deserve important looking white coat she was wearing.
Ive considered Atripla just for the high, but its betta that I stick with my daily 1/2 can of beer stout.He,He,He. im really such a light weight.
Anyway Ive been positive for 10 years and my life is still the same as before I was diagnosed.Im even learning how to surf. Does holding onto the board upside down and getting dragged by 'big' waves count as surfing??
The scariest time after being diagnosed is the waiting to start meds, I had a year of torment, You have started your meds so you skipped that part. ;) and the best thing is that the meds are your best friend, just wait and watch how it wipes out the viral load to undetectable. everybody experiences the extreem anxiety after being diagnosed, we all had it bad. I decided after 2 years of worrying that Im not going to waste my life worrying about whats next- and Im glad I decided that because 8 years later I look back and I think to myself: ''Im still going strong 10 yrs later,so what a waste if Id spent all those years worrying?''
you have to go through the emotions first and then it all irons out.
Thats really cute: the platonic hugging thing! but Im sorry man, my partner may not be amused! what do you do? Are you in the airline bussiness?
Cheers 4 now, Steve
Good luck, and I look forward to your updates!
Peacock,Steve
Diagnosed 07/01/2002
Started Haart- 25/11/04 Cd4: 205 VL: 76'500
                      19/12/08 Cd4: 623 VL: UD
      26/03/12 Cd4: 497 Cd4%: 30.10 VL: UD
Combivir and Nevirapine(200mg) x1 of each-Am & pm
Not changed Meds since starting on HAART
Green Tea,Multivit,Selenium ACE,Folic acid,Vit C,Aciclovir 200mg 5x per day for 3 days-(ONLY when I have Shingles!)
100 percent adherence-with the help of a wristwatch!

Offline PAGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 16
Sorry it took so long to respond...I have been through a lot...but the best news was that my vl went from over 2 million to 1192 in 5 weeks!   I was frankly scared to come back on here because I was afraid what i might see in terms of responses.   But they have been great....thanks.     Don't know my cd4 improvement yet but I had blood drawn yesterday....so we will see...my doc is hoping for a rebound...me too...

Again that's for the support...lifted me up....does anyone know of an online chat room that is good?

March 2012---tested positive
Started Atripla, Batrim DS, Amoxycillan
April 2012---cd4 49, vl 2,000,000
June 2012---cd4 296, vl 1294
Discontinued Batrim DS and Amoxycillan
Sept 2012---cd4 300, vl UD
March 2013---cd4 308, vl 53...minor blip! Cd%26
Switched to Complera

Offline emeraldize

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,343
Hey PA,

Sorry you're here, glad you found the site.

That doctor totally screwed up. So much so that I would be inclined to report her so she doesn't do the same thing to anyone else ...ever.

Was she called in as a consult post-surgery? It's confusing as you've written it. Was it discovered via a routine pre-op blood test?  No matter what, you deserved much better handling by her or a designee, referrals to local resources, etc.

Em

Offline PAGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 16
I was hospitalized with an abscess to be drained...they called her in....she wasn't very compassionate...
March 2012---tested positive
Started Atripla, Batrim DS, Amoxycillan
April 2012---cd4 49, vl 2,000,000
June 2012---cd4 296, vl 1294
Discontinued Batrim DS and Amoxycillan
Sept 2012---cd4 300, vl UD
March 2013---cd4 308, vl 53...minor blip! Cd%26
Switched to Complera

Offline PAGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 16
Oh...I forgot...thanks Em...what you said helped a lot...I was just trying to respond too quickly
March 2012---tested positive
Started Atripla, Batrim DS, Amoxycillan
April 2012---cd4 49, vl 2,000,000
June 2012---cd4 296, vl 1294
Discontinued Batrim DS and Amoxycillan
Sept 2012---cd4 300, vl UD
March 2013---cd4 308, vl 53...minor blip! Cd%26
Switched to Complera

Offline emeraldize

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,343
That's okay. Obviously, she's not gonna be your top pick for an ID doc. Have you shared what happened with your current doc?
« Last Edit: June 16, 2012, 04:39:28 PM by emeraldize »

Offline PAGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 16
They are in the same practice...and he is amazing....so I won't say anything
March 2012---tested positive
Started Atripla, Batrim DS, Amoxycillan
April 2012---cd4 49, vl 2,000,000
June 2012---cd4 296, vl 1294
Discontinued Batrim DS and Amoxycillan
Sept 2012---cd4 300, vl UD
March 2013---cd4 308, vl 53...minor blip! Cd%26
Switched to Complera

Offline emeraldize

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,343
Was hoping that wasn't the case. Glad you've got someone amazing. As your relationship builds, you may find it is still beneficial, without harm to you, to pass the information along---even if in a hypothetical form. You might affirm something that others have experienced and suffered through -- even her colleagues.

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2014 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.