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Author Topic: Scared and Suicidal.  (Read 2952 times)

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Offline RepentingUser

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Scared and Suicidal.
« on: February 26, 2012, 11:34:55 AM »
Hello everyone. 1st of all I'd like to thank everyone on this forum to help one another and making a positive difference to people who are desperate for any advise.

Here is what happened with me. I was having Protected Sex with an escort last week. After a few minutes while changing the position I pulled out and saw that the condom was red and wet with the blood. I stopped immediately and asked the girl what the hell was that. She immediately apologized and explained that her period just started and she could take my condom off if I wanted. I refused and asked where the restroom was. she said it was downstairs. I went to restroom and as I started rolling the condom off slowly, I saw some blood on my penis shaft. I cleaned it with the wipe she offered. Then I took the condom off completely and confirmed that there was no blood either on the head or on the tip of the penis. I am also circumcised. I washed my penis and felt a little relaxed. Since I hadn't ejaculated yet, she offered me oral, and I accepted it with a new condom.

Now the symptoms...which are scaring me to death.

On 8th day post encounter, I am having fever, severe headache, my throat hurts a little, dry mouth, my tonsils and a few spots on my tongue are covered with something white. especially the thrush making me crazy. I went to see a Dr. and he did a strep test which came out negative and he asked me to take tylenol/ibubrufen.

On day 10th I feel a little better...my headache, fever and throat are better.

Due to these symptoms I am almost convinced that I am infected with HIV. I can't think anything else and cant go on with life. Not able to sleep anymore.

Guys, What's your assessment of this encounter and exposure ? Please help.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #1 on: February 26, 2012, 11:53:21 AM »
Hello everyone. 1st of all I'd like to thank everyone on this forum to help one another and making a positive difference to people who are desperate for any advise.

Here is what happened with me. I was having Protected Sex with an escort last week. After a few minutes while changing the position I pulled out and saw that the condom was red and wet with the blood. I stopped immediately and asked the girl what the hell was that. She immediately apologized and explained that her period just started and she could take my condom off if I wanted. I refused and asked where the restroom was. she said it was downstairs. I went to restroom and as I started rolling the condom off slowly, I saw some blood on my penis shaft. I cleaned it with the wipe she offered. Then I took the condom off completely and confirmed that there was no blood either on the head or on the tip of the penis. I am also circumcised. I washed my penis and felt a little relaxed. Since I hadn't ejaculated yet, she offered me oral, and I accepted it with a new condom.

Now the symptoms...which are scaring me to death.

On 8th day post encounter, I am having fever, severe headache, my throat hurts a little, dry mouth, my tonsils and a few spots on my tongue are covered with something white. especially the thrush making me crazy. I went to see a Dr. and he did a strep test which came out negative and he asked me to take tylenol/ibubrufen.

On day 10th I feel a little better...my headache, fever and throat are better.

Due to these symptoms I am almost convinced that I am infected with HIV. I can't think anything else and cant go on with life. Not able to sleep anymore.

Guys, What's your assessment of this encounter and exposure ? Please help.
You never had a risk and your symptoms have nothing to do with ARS.

Offline RepentingUser

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #2 on: February 26, 2012, 08:28:11 PM »
Thanks a ton Rapid..!! your comment has given me some light of hope. although whenever I search for my symptoms, HIV is the top hit I get. I pray and hope what you are stating is correct. I am still very very scared and depressed though...

do you recommend me getting tested after 6 weeks ? is there any other test that can be done faster to test or I have to wait for 6 weeks minimum ?

what is Ann, Andy n other senior folks evaluate of my encounter and exposure ??
Highly appreciate any comment...

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #3 on: February 26, 2012, 08:53:32 PM »
Thanks a ton Rapid..!! your comment has given me some light of hope. although whenever I search for my symptoms, HIV is the top hit I get. I pray and hope what you are stating is correct. I am still very very scared and depressed though...

do you recommend me getting tested after 6 weeks ? is there any other test that can be done faster to test or I have to wait for 6 weeks minimum ?

what is Ann, Andy n other senior folks evaluate of my encounter and exposure ??
Highly appreciate any comment...
Don't recommend any testing at all. At no time did you have a risk of contracting HIV.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #4 on: February 27, 2012, 07:07:45 AM »
Rep,

I agree with Rodney. You did not have a risk and you do not need to test over this specific situation.

Please knock off with the "suicidal" drama. Even if you were at risk (you were NOT at risk), hiv is nothing to kill yourself over. You know, it's kinda insulting to those of us who live with hiv everyday when people indulge in this type of drama over hiv. It adds to the stigma, so think about what you're saying, ok? Thanks.

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse where the virus never leaves the confines of the two bodies.

Once outside the body, small changes in temperature, and pH and moisture levels all quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect. For this reason, the blood on the outside of your condom is not a concern. It was outside the body when you had to deal with it.

You only would have been at risk if you didn't wear a condom and your unprotected penis came into contact with her menstrual blood INSIDE her body. This isn't what happened.

I understand that seeing blood on your condom covered penis may have been alarming, but it did not put you at risk for hiv infection. So relax.

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. You can bet that intercourse during a woman's period was quite common during these studies.


Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER THIS SPECIFIC SITUATION, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
« Last Edit: February 27, 2012, 07:09:49 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline RepentingUser

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #5 on: February 27, 2012, 12:32:52 PM »
Thanks Ann and Rapid ! pls acept my sincerest apology. I understand. Unfortunately for some of us the anxiety level is too overwhelming to handle when we find ourselves in this situation for the 1st time. Since we all are different with different mindset, tolerance level and have different social, geographical, personal parameters to deal with. Lot of this anxiety comes from a lot of unknown parameters (treatment, life span, complications, myths, propaganda) about HIV. Having said that, I absolutely understand your concern and agree with you. We should at least TRY to be mindful while we post these comments.

Thanks a lot once again and I wish you good luck.

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Posts: 24,705
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #6 on: February 27, 2012, 04:51:10 PM »
And if you decide to get tested simply for your peace of mind, given what you have reported of the sexual incident I don't have any doubts that you will test negative. Nothing you reported put you at risk. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline RepentingUser

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #7 on: March 04, 2012, 09:08:19 PM »
Thanks Andy, Ann and Rapid..I come on this forum and read your statements again and again. that gives me hope and I feel a little better.

One question which has been bothering me is that "What if the blood I saw on my penis shaft came in contact while I was having sex or while I was in her body ?" Does it matter as far as shaft of my penis (like 50%) had blood on it or it has to be the head/tip of the penis ?

My symptoms right now is just having a mild fever like may 98.6 degree....don't know why would that be...my fingers are crossed...

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #8 on: March 04, 2012, 09:21:28 PM »
Thanks Andy, Ann and Rapid..I come on this forum and read your statements again and again. that gives me hope and I feel a little better.

One question which has been bothering me is that "What if the blood I saw on my penis shaft came in contact while I was having sex or while I was in her body ?" Does it matter as far as shaft of my penis (like 50%) had blood on it or it has to be the head/tip of the penis ?

My symptoms right now is just having a mild fever like may 98.6 degree....don't know why would that be...my fingers are crossed...
You aren't having ARS symptoms, you've never had an exposure.

Offline RepentingUser

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #9 on: March 04, 2012, 09:49:28 PM »
God bless you Rapid ! I again hope and pray, what you stated turn out to be true.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #10 on: March 05, 2012, 08:50:56 AM »
There is no basis in HIV science or experience for you to be worried.

You need to get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #11 on: March 05, 2012, 09:47:47 AM »
Repent,

98.6 F isn't an elevated body temperature. It's a NORMAL body temperature. You do not have a fever. Come back and talk to us when you have a temperature over 102 F. Now that's a fever.

As I said to you before, sure, I can see where it may have been scary for you to see your condom covered in blood and some blood on the shaft of your penis. But it simply wasn't a risk.

You did the right thing and wore a condom - and that condom covered the important bit - the head. You told us there was no blood on the head of your penis and that means you were protected and not at risk.

Believe me, if we thought you were at risk, we'd tell you. One of our main jobs here is to help people catch hiv infection before they infect anyone else, so yeah, we'd tell you all right.

You didn't have a risk. End of story.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently and get a FULL panel of STI testing at least once a year, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!!!


If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


Please consider yourself warned!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline RepentingUser

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #12 on: March 14, 2012, 11:29:35 PM »
Thanks a lot Ann ! Highly appreciate your response. I am sorry for my ignorance about 98.6 being fever. Since lots of people report "low grade fever". not sure what they mean by that. I thought that might be the case with me as my normal body temp usually has been 97.5F Anyway, since you ruled out my situation as "No Risk Situation", I guess even if I have 102F fever I shouldn't bother you guys and see a doctor instead since it has nothing to do with ARS...correct ?

One more thing though...I have had 3 incidents of sore throat ever since this incident. Don't know if it really is soar throat or something else because my throat hurts a little on my left side and I see something white on my left tonsil in my throat. I tried to take that whitish away with my finger, but it doesn't seem to go away. Also I feel tingling behind my ears, neck pain and sometime pain in my groin areas. Just an FYI...
If any of you guys think its a waste of your time to respond to my note, please DO NOT comment as I don't want to be banned from this wonderful forum/people. I understand. Although I'd appreciate if anyone of you decide to give 2 cents.

The other thing is, I had Protected sex with my regular partner and after that I had pain in my groin/thigh area for next 2-3 days. I wonder if this might be latex Allergy ? just thinking out loud here....

Thanks a ton in Advance !!!

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 24,705
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #13 on: March 15, 2012, 09:13:08 AM »
You've already been given all the two cents worths that you need. You did not have a risk. And coming up with more symptoms is not going to change that.

If you come back again about this non-risk situation you are going to get a Time Out. HIV is not your problem. Period.

Perhaps as with many straying partners your guilt about having dallied with an escort maybe driving your unwarranted concerns about HIV. But whether that is so or not, you didn't have an HIV risk. And you should be discussing your symptoms with your doctor to determine the real cause.

There's nothing more we can do for you here.   
Andy Velez

Offline RepentingUser

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2012, 05:08:22 PM »
Thanks Andy....I appreciate your comment ! I agree with you on "guilt about having dallied with an escort". I hope it stopped right there (guilt) and nothing more. Thanks again !

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Scared and Suicidal.
« Reply #15 on: March 21, 2012, 05:16:23 PM »
You're welcome.
Andy Velez

 


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