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Author Topic: Who's right???  (Read 2155 times)

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Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Who's right???
« on: March 02, 2012, 06:51:46 PM »
Mr. Andy and Mrs. Ann:
I had unprotected sex on Nov 22, 2011. I was unfaithful to my partner. I feel so disgusted for what ive done. I have no words to describe the pain and shame im feeling. Maybe i deserve all this suffering for what ive done. I first tested on Dic 22, 2011 via antibody test and it was negative. Tested on January 4, 2012 via antibody test and it was negative. Again on January 14, 2012 antibody, negative. By now I have become a nervous wreck and cant get hiv of my mind. Dont eat or sleep. Lost about 15 pounds due to anxiety. Tested again on February 2, 2012 rapid test Clearview Complete, negative. On February 10, 2012 thinking im just 4 days shy of the 12 weeks i had another rapid test, negative.
By this time i look and feel like a skeleton. Im doing all the testing on the health deparment std clinic of where i live. I thoug ht 12 weeks was conclusive and was happy for about two weeks. And then they call me from the std clinic to remind me that the test is only 100% conclusive at 6 months...  started browsing and almost all sites state 6 month is conclusive, called cdc and they also told me the same... now im desperate, much worst than before.
What should i do??? I know ive acted wrongfully but please help me out i got no one to talk to about this and its slowly but surely killing me..

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #1 on: March 02, 2012, 06:55:40 PM »
They are behind times.

http://www.cdc.gov/globalaids/Resources/pmtct-care/docs/TM/Module_6TM.pdf
Page 11
#4
  In an adult, a positive HIV antibody test result means that the person is infected, a person with a negative or inconclusive result may be in the “window for 4 to 6 weeks but occasionally up to 3 months after HIV exposure. Persons at high risk who initially test negative should be retested 3 months after exposure to confirm results

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Posts: 25,190
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #2 on: March 02, 2012, 07:08:41 PM »
You are conclusively HIV negative. There is no need for further testing.

Torturing yourself with guilt is not a sign of higher character. It's bad for your health and for your relationship so cut it out and stop indulging in that drama.

Do yourself and your partner a big favor and just get on with your life. HIV is not your problem. Really. Forget about the incorrect nonsense you read on other sites. And stop surfing the net because all you will do is find more ways to torture yourself and that is not a good idea.
Andy Velez

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2012, 07:25:53 PM »
Mr  Andy:
Its been such long days filled with anguish.
I just want, after screwing up so badly, to b 1000% sure i wont give my husband anything.
Mr. Andy or Mrs Ann why if CDC is supposed to b on top of knowledge when it comes to hiv testing, did they told me my tests were not conclusive???
I dont want to stay in this state of despair im at right now, but sometimes is so darn difficult. Dont get me wrong i know what i did and this are the consequences but its so freaking painfull....

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2012, 08:00:02 PM »
That is BS. I just posted the CDC link to the training manual. 3 months is conclusive and has been since 2004.

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #5 on: March 02, 2012, 08:14:07 PM »
Mr Rapidrod:
I aint lying or saying bs... i called the cdc info line and explained my situation and the guy told me that 3 months as good but conclusive at 6. Thats why im so  confused im reading on the link u posted and its weird that on their info line they say otherwise, now can u umderstand why im so confused???? why the different opinions by the CDC??? this could make any1 crazy!!

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #6 on: March 02, 2012, 08:17:10 PM »
You didn't talk with anyone with the CDC you talked to the equalivance of a telemarketer that doesn't know his ass from a whole in the ground.

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #7 on: March 02, 2012, 08:41:54 PM »
MR. Rapidrod:
Ok, when u call 1-800-cdc-info u aint talking to CDC people???????!!!!!!! Who are u talking to then?? thats just plain wrong, imagine the anguish incorrect info can cause to worried people like me, granted whe are in this out of our own bad choices but still.....
Mr. Rapidrod, Mr. Andy and/or Mrs. Ann:
Does it matter that i tested with a rapid test and that it was 4 days before 12 weeks???
Mrs. Ann would love ur advice.....

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,239
  • Ninja Please
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #8 on: March 02, 2012, 08:44:19 PM »
MR. Rapidrod:
Ok, when u call 1-800-cdc-info u aint talking to CDC people???????!!!!!!! Who are u talking to then?? thats just plain wrong, imagine the anguish incorrect info can cause to worried people like me, granted whe are in this out of our own bad choices but still.....
Mr. Rapidrod, Mr. Andy and/or Mrs. Ann:
Does it matter that i tested with a rapid test and that it was 4 days before 12 weeks???
Mrs. Ann would love ur advice.....

Dire,

Forget about the fucking CDC, love. Listen to us.

As Andy told you:
You are conclusively HIV negative. There is no need for further testing.

Torturing yourself with guilt is not a sign of higher character. It's bad for your health and for your relationship so cut it out and stop indulging in that drama.

Do yourself and your partner a big favor and just get on with your life. HIV is not your problem. Really. Forget about the incorrect nonsense you read on other sites. And stop surfing the net because all you will do is find more ways to torture yourself and that is not a good idea.

That is all you need to know about this. You are conclusively HIV negative.

MtD

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #9 on: March 02, 2012, 09:11:34 PM »
Mr. MtD
Im trying to let go, i really am. I was careless before and dont want to b ever again. I want to b sure is all. Can u tell me if 4 days shy of 12 weeks is anything to fret over??
I just want to b with my hubby with a complete confidence of  things he didnt deserve a  cheating and doesnt deserve a std even less if i did that i would die....
Mrs. Ann???

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,239
  • Ninja Please
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #10 on: March 02, 2012, 09:21:47 PM »
Mr. MtD
Im trying to let go, i really am. I was careless before and dont want to b ever again. I want to b sure is all. Can u tell me if 4 days shy of 12 weeks is anything to fret over??
I just want to b with my hubby with a complete confidence of  things he didnt deserve a  cheating and doesnt deserve a std even less if i did that i would die....
Mrs. Ann???

Listen to me. You are conclusively HIV negative, the 4 days make no difference at all.

Clearly you are feeling very guilty and think you deserve to be punished. HIV is not a punishment, it's just a virus. If you feel bad about cheating on your husband, you will need to speak to a counsellor or some other professional. We cannot help you with that here.

But you do not have HIV. Please check out our Welcome Thread and review our posting guidelines. You will not be allowed to post endlessly questioning a conclusive negative test result.

MtD

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #11 on: March 02, 2012, 09:43:19 PM »
im sorry Mr. MtD sr...
I would really like Mrs. Ann opinion i wont post anymore... thank u Mr. Mtd, Mr. Andy and Mr. Rapidrod for ur time.... its been hell and back is all and ive had the misfortune of been counseled by people that seem "behind times" as Mr. Rapidrod said and that has cost me my peace of mind... i just want this to b over
Mrs.  Ann if u can answer/counsel me, plz?

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 25,190
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #12 on: March 03, 2012, 08:18:43 AM »
Collecting anymore opinions about your situation is not going to change anything. You're HIV negative. Your disbelief about that fact is irrational.

You need to get on with your life. If you can't let go of this unwarranted fear then I suggest you seek out some professional help. We can't help you with that in this setting.

HIV is not your problem.

Andy Velez

Offline indireneedofhelp

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #13 on: March 03, 2012, 12:08:49 PM »
I regiatered on this forum cause i was very interested on ur opinion (mr. andy) and the opinion of mrs. ann.
Due monday i have an appointment with my gp to try an explain my situation and to seek help for my irrational mental state. guess medication is due also ...
. How in the world will i explain all this crazyness to my gp? i know is a stupid question but i needed to ask..

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 25,190
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #14 on: March 03, 2012, 12:40:35 PM »
Just speak as simply and directly as you can about your concerns. Let your doctor hopefully help you to sort things out. 

We can't do anything else for you here.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Who's right???
« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2012, 05:48:33 AM »
dire,

My opinion is exactly the same as everyone else's. You are conclusively hiv negative.

I will only add that hiv is NOT a punishment - it's a virus that is sometimes transmitted between two people when they have UNPROTECTED anal or vaginal intercourse when one of them is already hiv positive.

Unless you had unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, then you've been worrying over nothing anyway You never said exactly what you believe put you at risk, only that you were unfaithful to your partner and that, on it's own, is not a risk for hiv infection unless you had unprotected intercourse.

If you DID have unprotected intercourse, you are still conclusively hiv negative, but you need to learn from this experience and USE CONDOMS for anal or vaginal intercourse. You can have as much sex as you want, provided you USE CONDOMS.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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