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Author Topic: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter  (Read 2707 times)

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Offline Annon1234

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Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« on: April 10, 2012, 10:13:28 AM »
Hi,

I've had a sexual encounter yesterday and I'd like to know what's my chance of being infected...
It was like my 3rd time overall, with a guy I've already been with once.
Both times and in general - i haven't experienced penetration ever...
The guy was very polite through the whole act and asked me if I'd like to perform anal and i said no and he respected that.
We were both without condom because we agreed we won't do anal...
We did mutual oral sex, mutual masturbation and fingering.
In a certain point of the act he rubbed his penis against my anus.. i don't really know if he did touch the anus but i assume there was a touch. I'm 99% certain he didn't enter (I've asked him later and he said that he didn't... I cannot know for sure whether he did or didn't because I've never experienced it before so i don't know how it feels like but i guess I'd know if there was something inside of me...)
I know for sure that he had precum on his penis.
As i recall that certain point of the act lasted about 20 seconds... but let's say it lasted about 2 minutes TOPS and I'm exaggerating...
One more point i think can make a different is that i suffer from hemorrhoids...
They never made me bleed and lately they've been a lot better - even starting to disappear completely but there's still a small piece of skin outside of my anus...
One day after the act i checked my anus and tried to check and there was no blood at all.

It's the first time i went so far and I've learned my lesson, I'm going to get tested in 8 weeks because there's no test that indicates anything so soon ( :( ) and from now on i won't do anything even close to anal without a condom... even not fingering...
About the fingering I'm not too concerned because I've read there's almost no chance of being infected that way even though his hands were probably filled with secreting.

In case he didn't enter - what are my chances of being infected?
And in case he did (I should emphasize that even if he did enter he probably was inside of me for no more than 5 seconds...) what are my chances?

Is there something i can do now?

Thanks for your time and efforts!
« Last Edit: April 10, 2012, 11:52:39 AM by Annon1234 »

Offline Annon1234

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected?
« Reply #1 on: April 10, 2012, 10:14:31 AM »
Oh and because i haven't mantioned it before - i'm a male :)

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Possibly infected?
« Reply #2 on: April 10, 2012, 11:02:24 AM »
Dear Anon,

Let me spell this out: HIV is a fragile virus, it is transmitted in very particular ways. Those ways are:

Unprotected vaginal and anal sex;
Sharing contaminated injecting equipment such as needles and syringes;
In some cases from HIV positive mother to her unborn or nursing infant.

We assume the worst here, so let's assume his uncovered cock entered your piley arse.

You need to be tested for HIV. The likelihood of you testing positive as a result of this decidedly unpleasant encounter is very low. But test you must. You should also be tested for other STIs such as syphilis, gonorrhoea and chlamydia.

The window period for HIV testing is 13 weeks from the date of the sexual encounter.

Do keep us posted.

MtD

Offline Annon1234

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected?
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2012, 11:18:07 AM »
Thank you very much Matty...

I am going to get tested, i thought 8 weeks are enough but if 13 is what needed, I'll have to wait.

I am so happy to hear that the chances are very low... I'm almost certain he didn't penetrated me but since I've pictured so many things by now i can't be sure anymore...

Thanks for your patience and efforts :) You helped me get back my peace of mind...
oh and BTW sorry for my poor English it's not my native language..

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Possibly infected?
« Reply #4 on: April 10, 2012, 12:04:17 PM »
Thank you very much Matty...

I am going to get tested, i thought 8 weeks are enough but if 13 is what needed, I'll have to wait.

I am so happy to hear that the chances are very low... I'm almost certain he didn't penetrated me but since I've pictured so many things by now i can't be sure anymore...

Thanks for your patience and efforts :) You helped me get back my peace of mind...
oh and BTW sorry for my poor English it's not my native language..

I'm glad I've been able to help you.

Now go away and get tested.

Don't come back until you have the results.

MtD

Offline Annon1234

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #5 on: April 10, 2012, 02:20:00 PM »
I'm feeling stressed again... :(
I wanna know if i should start that PEP treatment.. I'm too scared i got infected.
There only been 48 hours since the encounter -
Is there anything i can do now?
Is there a kind of doctor who can see me and tell me i was penetrated or not?
I don't want it to be too late !

Please help...

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2012, 02:44:13 PM »
No, I don't think PEP is warranted in relation to this incident. If you had been penetrated you would have known it. You had some rubbing contact and that is not a risk.

As far as testing is concerned it's really just for your peace of mind because I don't read any for real risk in the incident you have described.

And yes, I expect you to test negative.   
Andy Velez

Offline Annon1234

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2012, 04:11:32 PM »
Woohoo!!!!!!!

Thank you very much!!!! You've made my day :D!

I will get tested but you brought me back my peace of mind!

And now - i really wanna thank this forum you guys are saints!

There aren't a lot of options for a guy like me to get information / to a hospital because of the difficult position i am at life now and you guys really helped me.
If it wasn't for you I'd probably be going insane or doing something stupid right now.
I LOVE YOU!
:) <3!!!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #8 on: April 11, 2012, 05:00:33 AM »
Annon,

OK, because I just know you'll be back, I've got this to say...

I also expect you to test negative over this - and no, you don't need PEP.

You mentioned in one of your posts that you thought eight weeks was enough. It's not, but here's the deal. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days.

A six week negative is highly unlikely to change, but MUST be confirmed at the three month point. What I'm telling you is that if you need more peace of mind at six weeks, a test at that point will be an excellent indication of your hiv status.

I do expect you to test negative, provided there haven't been any incidents of actual, full-on unprotected anal intercourse you forgot to tell us about. But if it's just this one rubbing incident? Negative.

Stay off hiv websites while you wait to test. All you'll do is feed your worst fears, drive yourself nuts and worry until you make yourself ill - and that will make your anxiety a thousand times worse. Don't do it.

Ann

PS - you love us? Stop being so mushy. ;D
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Annon1234

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2012, 03:50:37 PM »
Thanks you guys,

I've thought about it and tried to be rational.
Even if he has AIDS (which of course I can't know for sure but most of the people don't have it..) i'm more relaxed and i'm taking it easy, hoping i didn't catch anything, especially because of your answers guys.
I feel clean :).
I'm goning to get tested after my 23 days will pass, but minwhile trying not to think about it as much (even though some symptoms come and go - I dismiss those thoughts... It's all a result of overthinking I guess.. things I wouldn't have even noticed if it weren't for my worries...)

(Even though it's mushy :3)
Just wanted to say again thanks for your help guys,
'Cus I really feel you've helped me a lot and gave me a lot of knowledge and peace of mind...

I will come back with the results, hoping and knowing ( :) ) i'll get a negetive answer.

G'night all! Peace.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2012, 04:24:12 PM »
OK. Duly noted. And we continue to expect you to test negative.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #11 on: April 19, 2012, 06:11:13 AM »

I feel clean :).


Yeah, I feel clean too - I just got out of the shower. I'm feeling fresh, clean and fragrant and guess what, I'm also hiv positive. You need to understand that to describe the state of your sexual health as "clean" is to imply that those of us who are poz are "dirty". It's insulting, so think before you say that again.

You're not going to test positive over this rubbing incident. No. Fucking. Way.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Annon1234

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #12 on: May 03, 2012, 03:20:31 PM »
I am truly sorry Ann, I hope that you know that I have never had any intention to insult you or anyone else by any meaning. I only used it as a figure of speech and meant that I am "clean" of the virus and did not imply that whoever is HIV+ is dirty or something else... Sorry again if I hurt anyone's feelings :(...

I got tested - 20 days after the encounter at a special HIV center
The test was a combined test of Combo and ELISA test and the test turned out negative.
I was very relieved, since every day is a new horrific nightmare for me.. I can't get it out of my head, and picturing the worst.
I read somewhere that the combo test is good for the range of 10 - 21 days after the encounter so I'm happy that it turned out negative.

My main reason for posting is -
Even though my test came back negative, I can't dismiss my "symptoms".

1. I sweat at nights (but that could be part of the tension that I'm in and the fact I'm trying so hard not to catch a cold that I'm covering myself with 2 huge blankets...)
2. I have a sore throat (but again, could be cus of my huge stress, my mouth is dry all the time cus I'm so scared...)
3. I lost weight (again, I barely have appetite...)
4. Weird body aches in random places for some seconds, then disappearing..

I know I sound like a crazy person but I really look for a reason to calm myself...
I really am scared, especially because i suffer from Hemorrhoids and have a piece of skin that is outside of my anus.
Sides, he fingered me (not for too long and not too hard), using spit as lube before rubbing behind me so that could make my anus easier to penetrate without me knowing or increasing the chances of infection...
So please - If my test came back negative now, does my chances of getting infected are even lower?
Are there statistics about tests that came back negative and after the waiting period became positive?

I really do believe that ALL of my symptoms are caused by STRESS AND STRESS ALONE. It's really bad for me, I know it and feel it but I just can't let it go.

I'm going to get tested in 30 days again - to put it behind me for 100%
but minwhile, can anyone say anything that i can hang on to?

Thank you very much and G'night.

PS. I just read about a kind of test - PCR. Can some1 explain more about it?
« Last Edit: May 03, 2012, 03:27:14 PM by Annon1234 »

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Possibly infected? Gay sex encounter
« Reply #13 on: May 03, 2012, 05:14:39 PM »
No. Your chances are not lower because of your recent negative.

Mainly because there us no number lower than zero.

You had. No. Risk.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

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