Quantcast

Subscribe to:
POZ magazine
Newsletters
Join POZ: Facebook MySpace Twitter Pinterest
Tumblr Google+ Flickr Instagram
POZ Personals
Sign In / Join
Username:
Password:
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
February 12, 2016, 08:00:57 PM

Login with username, password and session length


Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 685169
  • Total Topics: 53620
  • Online Today: 214
  • Online Ever: 585
  • (January 07, 2014, 02:31:47 PM)
Users Online
Users: 2
Guests: 138
Total: 140

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Author Topic: Hard to be LTS almost 30 years with no partner:  (Read 136 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline jm1953

  • Member
  • Posts: 287
Hard to be LTS almost 30 years with no partner:
« on: February 10, 2016, 11:11:05 PM »
Haven't been on for awhile.  Good to see familiar names.

Never did I think I would not be partnered at age 63.  But, my last relationship of 10 years ended miserably.  Thought this was the one to really settle down and take care of each other.  I was much further along with the virus than him who was practically a newbie.  Long story short, he couldn't deal with seeing or living with someone in the advanced stage of the virus.

Whatever the case, I have dated since, but no connection.  Now I am too sick and tired to even pursue a relationship.  Nor do I know I want one.  Just wish things would have worked out differently.

I asked my HIV doctor how the rest of his long term patients are doing 25 years POZ and up.  He said the majority are partnered which makes a huge difference in
a patients attitude knowing there is someone there for them that understands and will help them through it.

I've gone into a major depression which does not help things.  But my doctor is not surprised.  Fortunately I have a small network of friends and physicians who have helped feel the void.

For those of you partnered, I envy you.  Going through this alone and living with a double stigma having depression and an LTS is Hell. 

I wanted to ask the forum if there are other single Long Term Survivors like myself, and how you are dealing with it.  Maybe we can help each other.

Hugs to all.
Positive 29 years. Diagnosed 10/1987.  Current CD 4: 720: Viral load: almost 100.  Current drug regimen, Tivicay, Emtriva, Endurant, Wellbutrin, Clonazepam, Uloric, Losartan Potassium,Allegra, Ambien, Testosterone, Nandrolone, Vicodin, Benedryl, Aspirin, lots of vitamin supplements.

Offline BT65

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 10,568
Re: Hard to be LTS almost 30 years with no partner:
« Reply #1 on: Yesterday at 06:25:23 AM »
Hi JM,
I haven't been in a relationship for quite a few years and I'm doing fine. But I've gotten to the point where I'm comfortable enough with myself to not need a romantic relationship. 

I don't pursue relationships...I don't want to have to feel like I'm accountable like for other people's time, making sure someone is happy, etc.   I've had several health issues but I have good friends, a lot of which are on these forums.  And even though we live in different areas of the country they have helped as much as they can.  I also have a roommate who has been my best friend for over 20 years.  When I broke my leg, then had to have a rod put in, she was very helpful. 

I also lived alone when I broke my hip and had to have a plate put in. That's when a couple of the people on the forums helped me. Plus I had others from the forums checking on my well being which was nice.
 
I guess that's how I've gotten through the more recent years. The relationships I've had weren't necessarily healthy other than a couple.  I don't have a good picker so it's probably to my best interest to stay single.  Good luck. Being alone isn't so bad.

Betty
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Condom and Lube Info http://www.aidsmap.com/Condoms/page/1044833/
Please check out our lessons on PEP and PrEP. http://www.poz.com/factsheets/fs_2014_09_prep.pdf

http://www.aidsmeds.com/articles/Transmission_17146.shtml

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2016 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.