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Author Topic: One night that went not so good  (Read 2405 times)

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Offline myseek

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  • Posts: 8
One night that went not so good
« on: December 20, 2011, 12:26:52 PM »
Long story made short:
I'm usually very careful. But sex takes 2...

While in foreplay with a guy of unknown status...the guy decides to start moving his dick around my butt wich was safe and ok.

But on a moment he started spitting and tried to push harder into me (no protection).

This made me really uncomfortable, i asked him twice to wear a condom but he kept insisting...maybe for a couple of minutes.

Previous fingering, plus that push had my opening (pink area) quite irritated, plus some hemorroids history and i "closed" the possibility of sex as much as i could while i kept repeating him to wear a condom..i was too tense for sex...the situation wasn't nice anymore.

I assume my opening received some saliva and maybe some precum. I would know if he made it in that way (ouch!) but his persistence made me a little nervous... I scheduled testing but i'm feeling a little nervous/anxious, so i decide to tell my story.

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,277
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #1 on: December 20, 2011, 01:17:07 PM »
HIV is transmitted by;
Unprotected penetrative anal and/or vaginal sex
Sharing works with other IV drug abusers
Mother to child

You never had an exposure.

Offline myseek

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  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #2 on: December 20, 2011, 01:28:22 PM »
Thanks for your advice and the peace of mind you bring to me.

Since it turned into a wrestling for a second, i wanted advice under real life-day to day insight.

I know there was no actual penetration since...well... i would know! but it was as close as it can get...

Offline RapidRod

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #3 on: December 20, 2011, 01:30:00 PM »
Again, you never had an exposure.

Offline myseek

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2011, 10:34:28 PM »
Thank for your response RR.

So you think the risk is nonexistant (or statistically way too low).

My concern is that 2 minute "pushing" where all i could do was say "no" and "hold tight"...

Assuming a poz partner, assuming the hard rubbing/pushing got me sore, how should i asset the risk?

Maybe i'm too concerned about this night because it's the first time i have to play along to a guy whit his own unsafe agenda...


Offline RapidRod

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #5 on: December 22, 2011, 10:40:48 PM »
Non-existant.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2011, 08:44:42 AM »
The rubbing or frottage which you described is not a risk for HIV transmission. You are worrying needlessly.

There is no need for testing.

Get on with your life.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline myseek

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2011, 12:04:39 PM »
Thanks for your response RR and Andy.

BTW: My soreness was caused by some small white "pimps" around my opening..... guess it's some kind of herpes or hpv... will have to end up at the clinic anyway. :/

This new condition might enhance risks?

Thanks for your patience

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,277
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2011, 12:07:43 PM »
This forum is HIV specific, if you are concerned about symptoms you have see your doctor.

Offline myseek

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  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #9 on: December 29, 2011, 09:51:50 AM »
I'm still trying to remember how that "pushing" was....So after noticing my mind is still turning on that night...I went for a full screening today.

My sores are gone, but if I go around enough on the issue my head is finding new and creative ways to worry me....stress time!!! It's amazing how mind can play tricks on one's health...

Andy, RR...Have a happy 2012, be cool, be well, thanks for your support, information, time and above all...patience to all of us.






Offline Andy Velez

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #10 on: December 29, 2011, 10:16:11 AM »
Going for a full screening if only to ease your mind was a good move on your part.

Whatever maybe going on has nothing to do with HIV. You were not at risk, no matter what your mind is telling you to the contrary.

Good luck with your test results.
Andy Velez

Offline myseek

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #11 on: January 13, 2012, 04:07:33 PM »
Just to let you know.

I Just collected an early 3 week NEGATIVE for HIV and HEP B-C/VDRL. Now a little bit calmed down, waiting to retest @ 12 weeks.

I learned a lot. Many good things came out of this.

As a side note, maybe a note to self...the event that got me worried, is essentially not that different to some other things that happened to me in the past years. Not sure why THIS ONE particularly got me worried so much (maybe lack of control for the first time).

Thanks again for the patience!






Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #12 on: January 14, 2012, 05:07:58 AM »
my,

While you do not need further hiv testing (you did not have a risk for hiv), you'd be wise to test for all the other MORE EASILY TRANSMITTED STIs.

I fail to understand why people over-test for hiv when they weren't at risk and ignore all the other MORE EASILY TRANSMITTED sexually transmitted infections.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST FOR HIV OVER FROTTAGE, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline myseek

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #13 on: January 14, 2012, 08:44:56 AM »
Well Ann...

Regarding my risk...yeah, maybe i should just relax. Do you think i should take this DUO test as the closure of my worries?

On the other hand...Let me tell you, i've seen 3 doctors since the incident, regarding uretrithis, dysuria, post-ejaculatory pain... I was emphatic about "how it all started", i openly explained every one of them about: "received unprotected oral and then the rubbing/anal opening unprotected pushing".

The situation was almost identical every time: "no obvious std symptoms? then just test for hiv/hep"

It's a bit frustrating. I managed the 3rd doctor to run a prescription in case my uretrithis was gono/chlam. (a cefalosporin 400mgx1 + doxycicline x2 for a week)...maybe it's the downside of living in a small town...but i certainly tried to convince all of them that a full std test was a wise thing IMHO :/



Offline Andy Velez

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Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #14 on: January 14, 2012, 09:38:06 AM »
Our focus here is strictly on HIV. And HIV is definitely not your problem. If you take the Duo test it is strictly for your peace of mind because you did not have a risk.

Your frustration is understandable regarding the response of your mds to doing a full STD panel. Perhaps you can arrange to have it done in whatever the nearest city is to where you live.

For sure HIV is not your problem.
Andy Velez

Offline myseek

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #15 on: March 08, 2012, 03:09:54 PM »
Just for closure.

3 months mark negative result.

For all those around here googling symptoms:
Let me share my experience....
In this three months waiting i felt SO BAD, can't call it "sick", but i had: pruritus in my arms for a couple of weeks, sometimes my whole body would itch, back pain, like some mild lymph node feeling on my underarms, stiff neck, genital fungi, night sweats, insomnia, joint pain, muscle pain....can't remember now, you name it i might feel it.

Listen to RapidRod, Ann, Andy and the rest of the crew here. They know better!
Don't try to play doctor on yourself, stay OFF google. Symptoms mean nothing.

You read about "joint pain" as a symptom and the next day you wake up on pain?
you read about lymph node swelling and the next day you feel something odd in your armpits or groin?
That's your mind playing games!

Should i repeat? STAY AWAY FROM GOOGLING SYMPTOMS!

and of course: Always...ALWAYS play it safe!

Thanks for your support and for an inspiring work.
My seek is over
I'm out
Bye!

Offline Andy Velez

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  • Member
  • Posts: 24,399
Re: One night that went not so good
« Reply #16 on: March 08, 2012, 04:17:44 PM »
That's happy news. So take a breath and get on with your life and of course, always keeping those condoms handy.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

 


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