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Author Topic: Maintaining a bright outlook  (Read 3211 times)

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Offline rwt44102

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Maintaining a bright outlook
« on: January 09, 2012, 11:16:19 AM »
I'm a 23 year survivor. Last Spring I self-committed as I knew I wasn't thinking right. As soon as I landed in the psych. ward, I knew I had to get outta there. I'm on [more] meds. and being seen by a psychiatrist.
So, my question is: how do you all maintain a 'happy outlook'? I've lost 99% of my friends to AIDS. So, there's really no one left to talk to...suggestions?

Offline cjmchgo

  • Member
  • Posts: 38
  • Dx 1992
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2012, 11:31:24 AM »
I know what you mean... I'm a 20 year survivor who is going through a bout of pretty serious depression/anxiety right now. I don't know what the answer is but as painful as it is right now, i'm going to get up and go for a walk and try to stop sitting and worrying about the future. The only thing we can do is take our meds, exercise, eat healthy, see a therapist and maintain our friendships with family/freinds/partner.
If you're a spiritual person, I think believing in a higher power can be helpful because what it all boils down to is a fear or dying and the unknown.
April/May, 1992: Infected at age 21
Aug 31, 1992: Tested positive
Sep 8, 1992 T-cells 977, 43%
1993-1998: T-cells 675-800
1999-2001: T-cells 500-600
2000-2004: T-cells 425-525 23% VL 500-2000
2005-2008: T-cells 275-375, 20%, VL 950-2500
December 2008: Started Atripla
Dec 2009: T-cells 637, 33%, VL UD
Dec 2010: T-cells 544, 35%, VL UD
Dec 2011: T-cells 596, 41%, VL UD
January 2, 2012 stopped Atripla (CNS issues)
January 4, 2012 started Isentress/Truvada
March 25, 2014 Still on I/T t-cells 673, VL undetectable

Offline bear60

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,104
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2012, 02:31:39 PM »
I guess survivors come in all shapes and sizes and with various methods to cope with HIV. 
MIne, I found a new husband after my first husband died and tried to move on.
Losing friends has been espercially hard, though, I will admit.  I do volunteer work also.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline wolfter

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,460
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #3 on: January 09, 2012, 08:53:41 PM »
Welcome to the forums.  I wish I had that magic answer, but each of us arrive at that contented and happy place differently.  Not too long ago, I was in quite a bad emotional/mental place.  These forums and developed friendships have been a blessing. 

Best wishes and continue to reach out here....you'll find great support and develop some new friends. 

Wolfie
Complacency is the enemy.  ;)  Challenge yourself daily for maximum  return on investment.

Offline OneTampa

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,159
  • "Butterflies are free."
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2012, 11:04:05 PM »
I am a 27 year survivor and know exactly what you mean. 

I have lost many family members and friends and my first long term partner over the years. I also lost my mother in February 2010. There are times when I get overwhelmed missing their physical presence since a few of my friends and family members and I were really close and I was able to share my feelings and get such wonderful personal support.

I don't have a magic potion or answer either as others have stated here. I somehow just live off of the joy and love my family and friends brought me and the love I have for myself.  I am also extremely grateful that my natural tendencies lean toward survival and a mostly positive (no pun intended) outlook. It  helps to see our children doing well into adulthood even though they are off doing their own thing. Yet, I know that I will always remain a work in progress just like everyone else.

I sincerely wish you the best in your life's journey.

Please take care of yourself.

{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}

 
"He is my oldest child. The shy and retiring one over there with the Haitian headdress serving pescaíto frito."

Offline denb45

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,051
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2012, 11:28:29 PM »
I guess survivors come in all shapes and sizes and with various methods to cope with HIV. 
MIne, I found a new husband after my first husband died and tried to move on.
Losing friends has been espercially hard, though, I will admit.  I do volunteer work also.

Me too Joel, only I had to do the same thing you did twice ( find another husband )  now I'm his caregivier, he used to be mine, and it's a full-time-job too  ???

@ rwt44102 I'm a 25 yr. ( this JUNE 2012) survivor you have to take it in stride, after all of these yrs. and all that I have lost, I find comfort with the company of everyone here in these forums, it will get better, only if you want it too....hang-in-there buddy, and welcome  ;)

"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline aztecan

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,394
  • 29 years positive, 57 years a pain in the butt
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2012, 02:52:35 PM »
Hey rwt44102,

Like others said, it just putting one foot in front of the other and carrying on as best you can.

I will have 27 years as a pozzie this July. I really don't know how I have made it this far, but I did.

I think one of the keys for me is to get off my butt and do something. If I spend too much time alone with my own thoughts, I get depressed, morose or otherwise not in a good frame of mind.

So, I try not to do that. I work, which is a blessing for which I am grateful. I also am active in a faith community as well as keep myself busy socially.

I have lost many friends during the years to this bug, as well as my soul mate/life partner. Unlike others, I haven't met another partner. That is OK too, because I have made quite a few good friends, including some right here.

When I first came her, I felt lost and was in a dark place. Thanks to people here, I have left that behind.

Hang with us for a while, maybe you will find a bit of a light at the end of the tunnel too.

HUGS,

Mark



"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline Theyer

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,496
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #7 on: January 12, 2012, 11:54:03 AM »
Welcome Welcome , I agree with all the other darlings have said , No magic answers
{side effect  off anti -bios they make me thick as a brick }

But I do recommend participation in this forum , I just cannot articulate why at the moment but did want to welcome you, welcome,

Theyer
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline AlanBama

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,613
  • Alabama: the 'other' 3rd World Country!
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #8 on: January 13, 2012, 01:18:24 PM »
It is never easy.   Some days are worse than others for me.   On the bad days, I concentrate on ROUTINE.   Just go through the motions....things will (hopefully) look better tomorrow.

I think many of us are suffering from PTSD.   Love yourself, and be as good to yourself as you can be.  You are your own best friend.

I do better when I keep myself busy at something.    A Part-time job, volunteering, participating in my church....all these things help me keep putting one foot in front of the other.   Having a loving partner and wonderful pets helps too.

Best wishes,
Alan
"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline BT65

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 9,908
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #9 on: January 13, 2012, 04:59:44 PM »
Sometimes I find it hard, especially since I don't know many other female lts'ers, i.e. what it's like to raise children, experiencing grandchildren etc.   But I try not to stay in a funk too long.  I'll call and talk to someone, usually my best friend, and things get better. 

I still work, and go to school, and that helps.  I have gotten a bit close to a few people on these forums which also helps.  And I have a cat who accepts me whether I have my make up on or not. :)

Talking about it helps, so just keep talking, er, posting.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline bear60

  • Member
  • Posts: 4,104
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #10 on: January 16, 2012, 01:03:00 PM »
Betty
You know, having a pet is an important part of our lives too.  We have a cat......and of course he's spoiled. He was diagnosed  with hyper-thyroidism a year or so ago....and we have to give him HIS medication morning and evening.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline LiveWithIt

  • Member
  • Posts: 387
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2012, 10:33:52 PM »
I am just naturally an optimist.  I never think that Aids will kill me, I never think that if  I stop taking a med it will get resistant to it.  Not that I do, but I never bought that idea.  My previous doctor did studies and I would take drug vacations and try new meds with him.   It was nice taking a drug vacation, but right now my body is used to taking what I do and it's not a hassle to take them. 
« Last Edit: February 14, 2012, 10:35:36 PM by LiveWithIt »
Pray God you can cope
I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.

Offline Theyer

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,496
  • Current ambition. Walk the Dog .
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #12 on: February 21, 2012, 12:30:40 PM »
Been thinking more bout this subject.... I need to have something to look forward too, this can be almost anything but ideally it will require a bit off work, effort, planning and be attainable. So much thrapspeak emphasis the here and now ..being in the present and I have no argument with that when my here and now is a reasonable place to be.However like many off us It just is not often.

So a plan, a trip a hope is usefull to fall into as it contains a hope it helps keep depression at bay. That's it the bleeding obvious post off the week.
loves
mhtv
"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ."  Tony Benn

Offline rwt44102

  • Member
  • Posts: 6
Re: Maintaining a bright outlook
« Reply #13 on: October 01, 2012, 06:05:06 PM »
I completely forgot I posted this.
Thank you ALL for the thoughtful messages.
Hope is alive sometimes I know I just ned to "fan my flame" so to speak.

 


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