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Author Topic: today im asking for help  (Read 1495 times)

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Offline zach

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today im asking for help
« on: December 07, 2011, 04:08:49 PM »
over the past year i've been locked in jail, baker acted for an overdose, three suicide attempts. its not like this is a new thing either, i've battled depression and anxiety to one degree or another since middle school. one by one i've destroyed every relationship i've ever had. sexual addiction. abused, abusive. scars from burns and cuts over the years like a timeline to my breakdowns. aids is new to my scene, but no big surprise.

today i tried to schedule a psychological evaluation, it'll take weeks for that, with a huge deductable. i also called an ASO for the first time, willing to consider any help they give. i know i'm not coping well, cracks are noticable. i don't want to play the doctor, but c'mon i'm bipolar 1 please just give me seroquel depakote and paxil, it worked once lets try it again ... send me on my way and hope for the best

i feel like the only mental health care i get is emergency help when i've messed up, then i'm treated like a fkn prisoner.

i can't continue like this
gonna go up to the mountain, for to find a little peace
looking over the valley, for the beauty i see
out across the hills, forevermore

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: today im asking for help
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2011, 04:31:39 PM »
Hi Zach, that whole scenario sounds dreadful and potentially dangerous. I see you live in Atlanta. Is there not a more "HIV clinic" set up there that integrates mental health services? The three suicide attempts were all in the past year? Did you not discuss those with any mental health professional after each attempt or what exactly? I suspect you've also not discussed much of this with your HIV doctor or else they would have been more insistent on, at least, getting proper bipolar treatment to you -- is this the case? Or have they just not been responding to your discussions if you've actually initiated them?

I hope your ASO can help you with local services, that's what they're supposed to do. I've certainly known many people in such situations as yours who pull through, but it can take a lot of work and the patient has to ultimately stay on top of it making it difficult. Best of luck.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline buginme2

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Re: today im asking for help
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2011, 04:45:44 PM »
The Ponce De Leon Center in Atlanta is an integrative HIV care center.  Maybe they can help you. Their phone number is (404) 616-2440.
http://www.gradyhealth.org/clinic/63/


An interesting article about the clinic was recently written up in CNN.  Here is a link.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/12/02/health/conditions/ponce-hiv-aids-clinic/


Offline zach

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Re: today im asking for help
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2011, 05:12:05 PM »
MsP one of the attemts led to the 72 hour Baker hold. I didn't follow up, I've been getting letters asking to contact for folluwup care.

I was seeing a therapist working to cope with my sons death, when I was diagnosed positive. I pulled away from everyone. Not the best thing to do, but its done.

bug, that number to the ponce clinic doesn't work, i've tried for a couple weeks now to contact them or the emory clinic. havent been able to speak to a person at either location.

also left a message with a case manager call back service at aid atlanta.

i need mental help, i know that, i'm willing to be honest and cooperative.

i need somewhere to live, i'm couch crashing with my elderly father, same father i ran away from at 13, this is not a healthy place for me to be.

my current id doctor is just the doc that was on call at the hospital when i was first admitted for pcp, he diagnosed me and tosses me a bottle of atripla every month, but that seems to be his limit
gonna go up to the mountain, for to find a little peace
looking over the valley, for the beauty i see
out across the hills, forevermore

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: today im asking for help
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2011, 05:24:29 PM »
I would recommend being more pro-active with your attempts as described. Instead of waiting for call backs and getting no answer, etc. don't wait on this ASO. Go ASAP to their physical offices and wait until they have you see a case manager face to face -- describe what you've related here and they should expedite things and hook you up. The fact that you haven't progressed from your hospital doctor to something better where more things are discussed when you know you have these mental health issues isn't going to work.

I just called that number and got a recording, but it does sound wrong. I would go to 341 Ponce De Leon Avenue
Atlanta, GA 30308 and fish around for answers. The CNN article is recent, as in five days ago, so they have to be somewhere. Sorry, but we don't live in Atlanta so we can only be so much help for you with local stuff. Atlanta is almost as large as the metro area where I live, so there has to be integrated HIV clinics there, more than one.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline zach

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Re: today im asking for help
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2011, 05:44:23 PM »
i know the resources are there, i just don't know what all is available but i'm going in with an open mind. either i find a way to work this out, or i'm gonna go off meds and travel RTW until my time comes due
gonna go up to the mountain, for to find a little peace
looking over the valley, for the beauty i see
out across the hills, forevermore

 


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