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Author Topic: MAYBE AM JUST TOO PARANOID?  (Read 3818 times)

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Offline mrParanoid

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MAYBE AM JUST TOO PARANOID?
« on: October 28, 2011, 02:50:36 AM »
I've just come across and have to say its a wonderfull site and you guys are doing great work helping people affected by or infected with the virus. Anyway Iam really low on hopes and I don't how my chances are. So here goes:
3 days ago, I got drunk and ended up having sex with a certain lady i met @ the bar. After about 10 minutes of sex i felt a different sensation for about 2 minutes so i removed my penis and to my shock, the head of the condom was off and my foreskin was covered in menstrual blood! I ran to the bathroom and washed off the blood with water. Now Iam so scared because after shouting at her for not telling me she was on her menses, she admitted that she hasn't tested in a year and has had unprotected sex in the last 2 months..Gosh! I feel so stupid for sleeping with a stranger. I'm at wits end. If she is poz, willl i definitely be too? I am uncircumcised 22 year old male in a country with 18% (1 in 6) hiv+ population..PLEASE HELP!!

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #1 on: October 28, 2011, 02:59:54 AM »
A) You SHOUTED at her? That's pretty lousy behavior on your part. What happened was an accident. No one deserves browbeating over a failed drunken sexual act. It's deplorable.

breath.


The scientific stuff, which I will say because I have absolutely nothing else polite to say is as follows"

Your condom protected you until it became totally dislodged. While you did have a risk, it is absolutely on the low end of the scale. You may want to test for this in three months, but I certainly expect you to come out ok. The risk of HIV transmission from female to male is FAR lower than the other way around.

This assessment is based on your partner being HIV positive and having a high viral load, by the way.

I now leave you in the more capable and level headed hands of Ann, Andy, Rod, and others.

Best of all possible luck.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2011, 11:36:38 AM »
jkinatl, thanks for your feedback, i know i was wrong to shout at her but i panicked, i've always practiced safer sex and this never happened to me! Just the site of blood brought my worst fears to motion. Andy, Ann, anything to add please?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #3 on: October 28, 2011, 12:28:50 PM »
As JK has indicated, your risk was definitely on the lower end of the scale.  HIV is not an easy virus to transmit and it is significantly harder to accomplish from female to male than the other way around. You were protected for at least a part of your encounter. All of which makes transmission to have been unlikely if she was HIV+.

You can test initially at 6 weeks if you want to. At 6 weeks all but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will have done so. So a  negative at 6 weeks points the way to the likelihood of a negative and conclusive result at 13 weeks.

Good luck with your test.
Andy Velez

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2011, 03:20:35 PM »
Thanks Andy, JK for the insight. At least i feel there's some hope, I'll try to relax and test out in 6 weeks time..

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #5 on: October 28, 2011, 05:37:18 PM »
And in the meantime make a real effort to focus on other matters in your life. Yes, you can do that and it will make waiting pass more easily than you may imagine is possible. Really. Just do it.
Andy Velez

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2011, 08:44:03 AM »
Hi again guys, I'm sorry to come back with more questions but my paranoia's eating @ me. So what i want to ask is:

i forgot to add that i only washed my forskin with cold water and no soap. Would this mean that i did not thoroughly wash up and increase my chances of infection?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #7 on: November 06, 2011, 08:46:50 AM »
That would not increase your risk. HIV is a fragile virus. If present, once exposed to the air and other changes like water it becomes non-viable.

Yes, I still consider this to have been a very low level risk and that you'll come out of this ok.
Andy Velez

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #8 on: November 06, 2011, 10:03:30 AM »
thanks Andy, that makes me feel less anxious. Anyway me and the lady both went for a rapid test 8 days ago, we both came out negative but only thing that worries me is that she had unprotected sex with her ex 2 weeks before we had our 'accident' so that's what got me all paranoid again. I certainly pray we both continue to test negative at 6 and 12 weeks..Thanks Again Andy...God Bless

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #9 on: November 06, 2011, 11:28:04 AM »
You're welcome. It's an excellent idea for you both to get tested together to get a conclusive result.

Good luck and keep us posted.
Andy Velez

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #10 on: December 04, 2011, 04:15:04 AM »
Now almost at that 6 weeks mark and i'm terribly worried. Been having flu like nasal congestion and cough for a week and all i keep thinking is its 'ARS'. Is it normal for ARS to show up likes 4 weeks after exposure? I'm just worried but this and this is the only place i get some real answers.. ??

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #11 on: December 04, 2011, 08:59:43 AM »
The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. There is nothing HIV specific about the symptoms you are reporting.
Andy Velez

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #12 on: January 23, 2012, 02:54:34 AM »
Hi Guys, Its now 3 months past my exposure and time to TEST. I am not too scared of going through with it but the thing is...i want to wait a little bit longer. Reason being, i have a lot of good plans in motion that are just about to break through and just the thought of possibly getting a +ve result now would shutter everything i have worked so hard to achieve. I just feel that if i wait a bit longer (say 2 months) i will be more mentally prepared to handle whatever comes my way. I know this sounds dumb and maybe ignorant considering i had a real risk, and you guys asssed it to be on the lower end, but that's the reality for me right now. Sorry to make this long but what is your advice Ann, Andy, Rod & others?

Offline Ann

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2012, 05:46:01 AM »
mr,

Given the fact that you are unlikely to test positive over this one-off, brief incident, I suggest you go have a rapid test now and get it over with.

A positive result will only "shutter" everything you have worked for if you let it. Live goes on despite hiv.

I do not expect you to test positive over this, but the only way to know for sure is to test. Go do it and get it over with.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #14 on: January 30, 2012, 04:57:28 AM »
Hi Guys, finally took the test today 14weeks after the incident...(Finger-prick Rapid anti-body blood test) and it came out NEGATIVE! The counselor at the testing center was particularly worried about the menstrual blood issue before the test. He told me that i should go for another test at 6 months (but he expects it to remain the same) and especially STD screening soon. Do you think the test is accurate enough and that i can move on from this...its really been hard sometimes...should i be worried about waiting another 3 months?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #15 on: January 30, 2012, 05:10:54 AM »
http://www.cdc.gov/globalaids/Resources/pmtct-care/docs/TM/Module_6TM.pdf
Page 11
#4
  In an adult, a positive HIV antibody test result means that the person is infected, a person with a negative or inconclusive result may be in the “window for 4 to 6 weeks but occasionally up to 3 months after HIV exposure. Persons at high risk who initially test negative should be retested 3 months after exposure to confirm results

They haven't used the 6 month testing guidelines since 2004. Whomever told you to test out to 6 months needs to go back to school.

Offline mrParanoid

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #16 on: January 30, 2012, 07:05:16 AM »
Thanks Rod, Ann, Andy and Everyone else for your help...Its time that move on from this whole thing...God Bless and Take Care!

Online Andy Velez

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #17 on: January 30, 2012, 08:38:25 AM »
The only exceptions in which testing up to 6 months is recommended are when longterm intravenous drug use is involved or the immune system is severely affected by organ transplant or an illness such as cancer. Otherwise 3 months has long been the standard for a conclusive negative result.

You are HIV negative. Period. You can with confidence get on with your life. No further testing is necessary.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: condom broke...menstrual blood..OH NO!
« Reply #18 on: January 30, 2012, 09:22:15 AM »
Mr,

While I agree with the counsellor that you should have a full panel of STI screening, I absolutely disagree with him that you need to test for hiv again at the six month point. The only exception being if you have unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse in the mean time. But you're not going to do that, are you? I certainly hope not.

It drives me batty that people obsess over hiv to the point where they never ever consider all the other STIs they are much more likely to have been infected with (as the other STIs are so much more easily transmitted than hiv could ever hope to be). Some of the other STIs can be present without any obvious symptoms (particularly syphilis, gonorrhea and chlamydia) so the ONLY way to know for sure is to test.

By the way, a correctly used condom rarely breaks. There are two leading causes of condom breakage.

One is not using enough lube. While this is more of a concern with anal, it is also a problem with vaginal as well. Make sure you're using plenty of water-based lube.

The other is having an air bubble in the tip. When you put a condom on, you need to pinch the tip with the finger and thumb of one hand while rolling it down with the other. Once it's on, give it a firm stroke from tip to base while watching the tip. If there's air present, you'll see it. If there is, roll the condom back up and try again. Once you're sure there's no air bubble, lube up and go for it.

You are conclusively hiv negative. It's time for you to move on, remembering to use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse without exception. It really is that simple!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline mrParanoid

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MAYBE AM JUST TOO PARANOID?
« Reply #19 on: August 12, 2012, 04:50:51 AM »
Well, Here I am Again. Had protected intercourse with a street CSW. I was drunk and it was in a dark abandoned building so i couldn't see much. After sex i thoroughly checked the condom for breaks and there were none. Shortly after leaving the building i felt a needle like pr*ck sensation below my left earlobe. I checked in the mirror when i got home but could not see any mark just a red bruising but the pain really kept feeling like a needle prick and hurt.

I know symptoms are unreliable but I started to worry when 7 days later i started feeling needle prick pains and burning in my back, feet and sometimes fingers whish lasted for about two weeks, a cold sore after 2 weeks and a cold after 4 weeks.

Now, my worry is that the CSW may have pricked me with an infected needle without me noticing since i was drunk and it was dark. If at all that was the case:

1. What is my risk if i was really pricked? (there was no blood just a sharp pain)
2. 7 days later i started having itchy needle ***** pains all over and a sharp pain in my back that comes and goes up to now. Is that an ARS Symptom?
3. Its been two weeks since my encounter, and am getting a bit stressed over the issue now. Should i worry about testing?

Offline Ann

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Re: MAYBE AM JUST TOO PARANOID?
« Reply #20 on: August 12, 2012, 05:50:41 AM »
Paranoid,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep everything in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.




You are indeed being too paranoid. The whole idea of people pricking strangers with needles is nothing more than an urban myth. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you aren't going to be the first.

I suggest you find a therapist who can help you with your paranoid delusions. We cannot help you with that here nor will we even attempt to help you with your mental health issues. It's outside our remit.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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