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Author Topic: WORRIED!  (Read 15307 times)

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Offline scarednm

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WORRIED!
« on: September 18, 2006, 09:40:24 PM »
I am very worried about whether or not I might have contracted hiv. I am a straight man that met with a random woman one night. heres what happened.

- Kissed for a few minutes
- Fingered her for a few minutes
- oral sex performed on me
- oral sex on her outside of her vagina for under a minute

one week later I had a cold sore (went away), at two weeks I had a white tongue (went away after testing), tested - with a home testing kit at 4 weeks (non FDA approved), at almost 6 weeks I am still very worried and I have had diarehha for the past couple of days. Also, felt a little tired. Please help with any feedback!

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #1 on: September 19, 2006, 05:47:25 AM »
scared,

Nothing you list is a risk for hiv infection. Please read through the Welcome Thread and follow the Transmission Lesson link so you can gain a better understanding of how hiv is and isn't spread.

If you want to avoid hiv infection, here's what you need to do:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #2 on: September 19, 2006, 02:20:31 PM »
Thanks Ann,

I feel better after reading your reply, just a couple other questions, I was terrified (wasnt sleeping good, drinking myself to sleep, and it was all I could think about) could this have caused symptoms? also, how accurate are the non-fda approved tests like the one I took?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2006, 03:56:39 PM »
Eventhough you said you used a non-FDA approved test, it doesn't matter. You didn't have a risk.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #4 on: September 19, 2006, 04:28:42 PM »
1. You were not at risk for HIV in the situation you are concerned about. Period. End of story.

2. Why in the world would you ever use a non-FDA approved test? They are easy enough to obtain from any number of sources.  In any case the issue is irrelevant in this case because you weren't at risk.

3. You should be discussing your symptoms with a doctor if any are still troubling you.

4. Neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. If there is a genuine risk, which there wasn't in this case, the only way to know your status accurately is to get tested at 13 weeks past the most recent risky incident.

Clear?
Andy Velez

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #5 on: September 19, 2006, 10:22:06 PM »
Thanks for the help, I feel stupid that I worried myself to death over this. I think the point is that you should always be careful.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #6 on: September 20, 2006, 08:41:10 PM »
sorry to chiime in again, just wanted to clarify, is going down on a girl risky (which I mentioned that I did), I have seen in other forums that you say it is? I am still feeling a little scared about the situation, still having mild diarehha, feeling tired, and not feeling like myself. please help with any feedback!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #7 on: September 20, 2006, 08:50:38 PM »
No, except for some STDs.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #8 on: September 20, 2006, 10:28:35 PM »
This is not an HIV situation.

If you're having troubling symptoms go see your doctor.

Andy Velez

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #9 on: September 21, 2006, 10:53:57 PM »
Hey Guys Back Again,

I am sorry to bother you guys, I did not mention that the woman I was with had a pierced lip (and I think that she had slept with a lot of people), does this matter? I never had any of these symtoms before and I have read that a cold sore and white tongue is cause by a attack of the immune system, also still feeling really tired and itcy. Please, what could cause these symtoms, they seem like hiv????

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #10 on: September 21, 2006, 11:05:59 PM »
NO that doesn't matter. You didn't have a risk for HIV and HIV does not have specific symptoms. See your doctor if your symptoms persist. They are not HIV related.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #11 on: September 22, 2006, 12:50:31 AM »
Rapid Rod,

Man you guys rock, I promise I will not bother you again, I am just a hypochondriac. I think once I realize I am ok I will feel better

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #12 on: September 22, 2006, 08:46:20 AM »
Pierced lip, schmeerzed lip. Your mind is just working overtime with scary thoughts that have no basis in HIV science. No kidding.

You weren't at risk.

It's not surprising you have been having those symptoms when you have been so stressed. Of course check them out with a doctor to be sure about anything else as a cause, but stress can wreak all kinds of hell with your immune system.

Thankfully, this is not an HIV situation.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline worried1

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could i be infected?
« Reply #13 on: September 24, 2006, 05:10:10 PM »
hello.

i am a 27 year old male, about eight weeks ago i had oral sex with a prostitute and she also performed oral on me. since then i have had symptom that i have not had before including fever, dry mouth, and fatigue which i looked up on-line and saw that they were all possible hiv symptoms! now i am a little scared. was i at risk for hiv? second, I have actually gained about 5-7 pounds since then, would this be possible if i had recently acquired the disease?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: could i be infected?
« Reply #14 on: September 24, 2006, 06:10:03 PM »
For starters, read the lessons in the opening link in this section on Transmission and Testing. You'll get all the basics there that you need.

Receiving oral is absolutely no risk for HIV transmission and giving oral to a woman is more theoretically risky than in actuality. The lessons will fill you in on the specifics.

Neither a weight gain nor a weight loss would ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status, nor would the presence or absence of any other symptoms. If you ever had a genuinely risky incident such as intercourse without using a condom, then taking an ELISA HIV test at 13 weeks is how you definitively know your HIV status. Hopefully you will always use condoms for intercourse whether you are with a professional or a civilian so you won't have that worry.

This time out thee is no cause for concern. But read those lessons. This epidemic is going to be around for a longtime to come and no one can afford to be ignorant about HIV.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: could i be infected?
« Reply #15 on: September 24, 2006, 07:22:28 PM »
worried1,

Can I ask why you are using different usernames while posting to our forums? Thus far, you have also used scarednm

Please realize that this kind of activity is disrespectful of other forum members, as well as our moderators. People spend a considerable amount of time helping others in these forums. Using multiple accounts is at the very least annoying, if not deceiving and disrespectful of others. It is also against our Terms of Membership which you agreed to when you became a member. This information is also contained within the Welcome Thread, which you should have read by now. So really, you have no excuse.

You must realize that the answers won't change, no matter how many names you post under.

I would appreciate a reply to this message, and I hope you will commit to using just one account - preferably your original one. If not, you will be banned from further access to the forums.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried1

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Re: could i be infected?
« Reply #16 on: September 24, 2006, 11:08:19 PM »
wow, you guys got me. i am a little embarrased. the fact is that i am experiencing changes in my body that i cannot explain and i am very scared. i know that something is effecting me and when i came to this site all i hear is that you are ok even though there has been documented cases of indviduals that were affected in the same way. i hope you guys are right and will be taking another test, by the way, never get headaches and have had really bad ones lately, also my cold sore has healed a little but has been here for about three weeks. please forgive me, and still talk to me, it wont happen again. thank you so much for your help!!!

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #17 on: September 25, 2006, 04:31:16 AM »
scworried,

I've merged your two threads and disabled your second account. Stick to your original username from now on or you WILL be banned, no questions asked. Got that?

Quote
i am experiencing changes in my body that i cannot explain

Maybe that's because you are not a doctor. If you're worried about your body, go see a doctor. You are not qualified to diagnose yourself and we can't diagnose you either.

Getting a blowjob is not a risk for hiv infection, as you have been repeatedly told. As long as you haven't been having unprotected intercourse with anyone - and I mean anyone, not just sex workers - then there's no reason at all to believe you are hiv positive. Go read my first response to you again. And again, until it sinks in.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #18 on: September 25, 2006, 09:44:56 PM »
Guys,

Thanks for your patience, you guys have been more than helpful, i know you ruled out blowjobs and kissing but I never got a real clarfication on going down on her, what would have to happen for hiv to occur, and how rare would this actually be? Also how many people actuall show symtoms that have hiv, and is dry mouth/white tongue common within a couple weeks, these are the only symptoms that have been driving me crazy about if i was infected, they both went away after about a week.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #19 on: September 25, 2006, 09:52:55 PM »
It's so rare, it has never happened. Again you haven't had a risk.

Offline Bean

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #20 on: September 25, 2006, 10:13:46 PM »
To the guy who had the white tongue and the diarrhea... those are also symptoms of stress, which results from excessive worrying! Worrying weakens your immune system, which could be why you got a cold sore. There are lots of explanations for your symptoms. When I'm really worried I don't sleep well and don't eat well, get the runs, dry mouth, bad breath, itchy skin, etc. Those have been my stress symptoms since I was a kid. Now I'm stressing about my own HIV scare (I was with a guy for 4 months who turns out to be a manipulating liar who was in rehab hospital last year and slept with a "questionable" woman who was also hospitalized for drugs. He doesn't shoot up (only pills, alcohol, and a psychotic break after attempted suicide), but I don't know if the woman did). Anyway, I'm freaked out about this, but I see that SO many other people are just as freaked out as I am. AIDS is one of the scariest things I can think of. So my stress symptoms are back and I got an HIV test today. I'll feel much better in a few days when the results come back (well, assuming that they're negative, which God I hope they are!)

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #21 on: September 25, 2006, 10:20:49 PM »
Bean, please keep all you thoughts and questions in your own thread.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #22 on: September 25, 2006, 10:49:40 PM »
wow, i hope that bean is right, are all of my "symptoms" usually caused by stress, how many poelple actually get these specific symptoms during ARS. Thanks

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #23 on: September 26, 2006, 10:44:21 AM »
Rapid?

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #24 on: September 26, 2006, 12:01:22 PM »
Scared,

Nothing that you have brought to this forum, including the oral each way, has been a risk for hiv infection.

Stress can cause all sorts of symptoms to crop up. It's also possible for you to get other sexually transmitted infections in your mouth/throat such as herpes or gonorrhea, but NOT hiv. If you're worried about your mouth, go see a doctor or dentist. Whatever is going on has NOTHING to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #25 on: September 27, 2006, 09:31:56 PM »
back again, i know you guys have told me that i have no risk, i believe you but want to take one more test to be sure, i am going to receive another non fda approved test i got on-line, i tested negative the first time with it at 4 weeks, it would be eight weeks when it this time. my question is how accurate are they, they claim to be 99.9%. please dont tell me i am stupid for doing this.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #26 on: September 27, 2006, 09:39:46 PM »
How accurate would a non FDA approved test be. Who would no, but since you don't need to be tested to begin with it doesn't really matter now, does it?

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #27 on: September 27, 2006, 09:41:41 PM »
how accurate would a FDA test be at eight weeks?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #28 on: September 27, 2006, 09:54:51 PM »
It would me pretty accurate.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #29 on: September 28, 2006, 06:33:45 AM »
scared,

From what I understand, the non-approved test available over the internet is one that returns a lot of false positives. Since you didn't name the test kit, I can't be sure on that. But buying a non-approved test is throwing your money away. Next time you get the urge to do that, throw it my way instead, ok?

If you can't bring yourself to believe us that you had no risk, you might as well wait for the three month point and get your conclusive answer then. Of course, from our perspective any test you take will be conclusive as you didn't have a risk, but it's your money and your life.

Just don't be surprised when you get your negative result.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #30 on: September 28, 2006, 02:35:30 PM »
would you suggest not even using it, I have not felt sick at all and never got a fever or swollen lymth nodes, it seems the symptoms I had were from stress and I have not lost any weight but gained a couple of pounds, the test is the one were it has two lines a "C" and "T" if they both turn pick it means positive, also the test also claims to be 99.9% accurate.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #31 on: September 28, 2006, 03:01:12 PM »
scared,

The test you describe is the one I had in mind when I said they have a high rate of false positives. If I were you, I would throw it in the trash where it belongs. I think the FDA has tried several times to shut this company down, but it would seem they're still in business. ~shrug~

Symptoms or even the LACK of symptoms means nothing when it comes to hiv - and I'm telling you that for future reference only as you didn't have a risk to begin with. You don't need to test at all.

If you insist on testing, go to the HIV testing center database, enter your zip code and find an anonymous testing center near you. Stop messing around with unreliable tests.

The bottom line here is that you haven't had a risk, you don't need to test and if you do, you will test negative.

Go forth and use condoms for intercourse.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

  • Member
  • Posts: 42
Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #32 on: September 29, 2006, 07:32:01 PM »
Rapid, Ann, and Andy. Thank you sooo much for your help, went and got a rapid test today and it came back NEGATIVE! I THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR ANSWERING ALL OF MY QUESTIONS!! I never knew that stress could cause so many symtoms to the point where you think that you are sick. Again, thank you so much if it wasnt for you guys I would have went crazy!

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #33 on: September 30, 2006, 10:01:44 PM »
ok back again  >:(, i thought it was over, i tested (-) with the home kit i bought on line at 7 weeks (thought 8, but was wrong). I am now having really bad headaches again, i read this can have during seroconversion??? anyway, please tell me that i should not be scared still. thanks

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #34 on: September 30, 2006, 10:08:16 PM »
Give it up. You did not have a risk, so there will be no seroconversion, no matter what you think.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #35 on: October 01, 2006, 12:48:25 AM »
so could you honestly tell me something, considering fingering, kissing, and oral both ways, what would acually be the chances of getting infected?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #36 on: October 01, 2006, 02:35:17 AM »
Zero, nilch.. You won't be getting infected from the situation you described.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #37 on: October 01, 2006, 02:43:02 PM »
rapid, how accurate are the orasure oral test at arounf eight weeks??

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #38 on: October 01, 2006, 02:53:29 PM »
Accurate as the others. Which you still would not be conclusive until your 12/13 week results.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #39 on: October 01, 2006, 03:08:54 PM »
so there would be achance of a negateive at eight weeks and a positive at twelve??

Offline RapidRod

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #40 on: October 01, 2006, 03:16:24 PM »
I have never seen it happen. It's just that the CDC says, three months. It is more or less a CYA protocol.

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #41 on: October 01, 2006, 04:59:27 PM »
ok, i oredered an oraquik oral test on-line, i will take it at eight weeks. if it is negative would you still suggest me testing again?? (i know that you said i dont have a risk, but i want to have conclusive results so I can live my life again)

Offline Life

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #42 on: October 01, 2006, 05:05:54 PM »
If it will settle your mind, test conclusively at 3 months..

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #43 on: October 01, 2006, 05:11:53 PM »
there is no other test that can be conclusive before 3 months??

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #44 on: October 01, 2006, 05:38:00 PM »
scared,

It doesn't really matter when you test, it will be conclusive as you didn't have a risk. You have to actually have a risk of infection before you can become infected.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #45 on: October 01, 2006, 05:46:10 PM »
Ann,

I understand that you are probably tired of answering my questions, i dont blame you, i just want to be able to have a clear mind and know that I have nothing to worry about, i am going to take the orasure oral test I ordered on-line and I will test again at 12-13 weeks, just wanted to know how accurate the orasure oral was because I believe on the site I ordered it from said it should be reliable after 28 days, is this probably true for someone that would have had a high risk?? heres the link.

http://home-hiv-tests.com/

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #46 on: October 01, 2006, 05:50:40 PM »
scared,

The ONLY hiv test kit that is approved for home use is the Home Access test. The Orasure test should only be administered by someone who is trained in their use.

And before you ask, no, I don't know why someone is selling them over the internet. Anything for a buck if they can find someone silly enough to buy.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #47 on: October 01, 2006, 05:55:15 PM »
are these test hard to perform on yourself??

also , if you dont mind me asking (if this is out of line please tell me and please do not answer) have you and your husband (who I believe is (-) ever worry about using a condom for oral sex if these is no risk? and obviously you kiss, this would acually prove to me that my one encounter was like you all have tried to tell me NOT A RISKY SITUATION, thank you

Offline Ann

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #48 on: October 01, 2006, 06:00:33 PM »
scared,

We do not use a barrier for any type of oral sex. We've been together for over seven years and he remains hiv negative. We only use condoms for intercourse.

The problem with the home tests - other than Home Access which has to be sent away for analysis - is not so much in giving the test, but interpreting the result. You'd be best off not bothering with it.

You'd be better off going to the HIV testing center database where you enter your zip code to find a testing center near you. You most likely can find an anonymous, free testing center near you.

But this does NOT change the fact that you didn't have a risk.

Ann
 
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline scarednm

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Re: WORRIED!
« Reply #49 on: October 01, 2006, 06:02:38 PM »
Ann thank you so much for answering such a personal question :), you guys have done more than enough!!!

 


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