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Author Topic: Unsure what to do.  (Read 3070 times)

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Offline singleguy

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Unsure what to do.
« on: October 13, 2009, 05:29:52 AM »
need some some opinions and then emotional support to go and get tested.

In april this year i got very sick. I was ill for around 7 weeks in total. Doctors could not establish what was wrong and symptoms eventually eroded.

I did not test for hiv as had no reason to. However all symptoms were like  a textbook classic of ARS.
fever, glands, headaches, stomach upset etc etc.

Then i got to thinking, as one does, 2/3 weeks prior to this illness i was on holiday in capetown, southafrica. I am very unclear on the issue of toothbrush and razor transmission. It seems to be a grey area .I was staying in a hotel there and always leave my personal items open in the bathroom.
IF somebody (eg. chamber maid) has used either/both my toothbrush or razor, what is my risk of transmission when i used them subsequently ? i would say i dont wash off my toothbrush prior to use, but maybe my razor, but not certain. I would have no clue what the time difference was between me using these items and the rooms being cleaned for example.

I had absolutely no sexual or physical contact whilst there. please help !?

Offline Ann

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Re: terrified.
« Reply #1 on: October 13, 2009, 07:32:08 AM »
Single,

Hiv is not transmitted from objects in the environment. It's a very fragile virus and once it finds itself outside the human body, small changes in temperature and pH and moisture levels all quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline singleguy

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Re: terrified.
« Reply #2 on: October 13, 2009, 07:39:12 AM »
Hi ann,

Thanks for your reply. So you are saying that even if they had been used its basically a no risk scenario. So any symptoms would not be related to this situation.

thank you.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: terrified.
« Reply #3 on: October 13, 2009, 04:55:32 PM »
That's right. No risk.

If you have symptoms that are bothering you that is something to discuss with your doctor. This is not an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline singleguy

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Re: terrified.
« Reply #4 on: October 15, 2009, 08:05:11 AM »
thank you andy.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: terrified.
« Reply #5 on: October 15, 2009, 08:19:38 AM »
You're welcome.

Andy Velez

Offline singleguy

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Unsure what to do.
« Reply #6 on: September 12, 2011, 07:36:22 AM »
Andy/Ann,

I had what i am concerned is an exposure at the weekend with a csw. Involved were all the things that you describe as NO RISK in the lesson and other posts on the website, including oral sex both ways.

But here is the thing. I am now in deep concern that penentration occured. I dont know why i would think that, as although i had been drinking, i wouldnt describe myself as blindly drunk. There was a reasonable amount of rubbing, and i think you call it frottage, so i am concered that some level of minor penetration occured. The rationale part of my brain says i would know, particualarly as i am aware what constitutes a known risk.

Is there anything you would suggest in this situation. Should i be considering PEP whilst i am still in the window period for that ?

Offline Ann

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #7 on: September 12, 2011, 07:53:46 AM »
Single,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep everything in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.






No, you certainly do not need PEP over this incident. As you say, I think you'd know if any actual penetration took place. You also know that frottage is not a risk for hiv infection.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

WHILE I WOULDN'T SAY YOU NEED TO TEST OVER THIS SPECIFIC SITUATION, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #8 on: September 12, 2011, 07:55:16 AM »
Nothing you have reported suggests the likelihood that penetration occured. Your fears are what this is about and in the domain of what ifs rather than what actually happened.

No, I don't think PEP is indicated but why don't you promptly discuss it with a doctor. Perhaps that will help to get clarity about what did and did not happen.

Guys often think that because they are with a sex worker they are at greater risk. The irony is that sex workers generally practice safer sex because they want to stay healthy. It's the "civilians" who are often less careful about always using condoms for vaginal/anal intercourse.

I don't see this as an HIV situation. You can always get tested just to ease your mind and collect what I anticipate as a negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #9 on: September 12, 2011, 08:07:00 AM »
Thanks andy/ann.

I wont consult a doctor as frankly i cant tell them anything i havent told you, and i think you can give me a better opinion. They are far more lklely to suggest pep just to cover all bases is my guess.

I guess my major concern is at what point frottage becomes penetration. I can state with certainty that NO unprotective penetative sex knowingly occured. My concern is that at some point rubbing / frottage might have involved some very short penetration. As i said i dont think it did but.....

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #10 on: September 12, 2011, 08:15:22 AM »
Fortunately doubts and fears are not facts. And the facts as you have described them would indicate that penetration did not take place.

Andy Velez

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #11 on: September 12, 2011, 11:26:30 AM »
Thanks Andy. Could i just ask one more question to clarify.

IF i came to the conclusion in the next 24 hours that some very brief, inadvertent penetration had taken place would you recomend seeking pep in this circumstance ? 


Offline Ann

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #12 on: September 12, 2011, 11:34:07 AM »
Single,

No, PEP would not be recommended in your case.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #13 on: September 12, 2011, 11:35:14 AM »
That's a very personal decision to make in which you weigh the extreme unlikelihood of penetration having taken place and the discomforting side effects of doing PEP against the possibility, however unlikely of a possible exposure.

I don't see the need for PEP in this situation but ultimately you need to make the decision.
Andy Velez

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #14 on: September 13, 2011, 01:56:32 AM »
Hi andy / anne. Dont know if you are around for a prompt response.

I just visitied the doctor to discuss. On balance they would like me to take pep. I am in asia, so i dont know if this is more normal or whether there is any element of financial gain as it is very expensive.

I told them i was almost certain no penetration took place, just oral both ways and genital contact. Their attitude is its lower risk, but as the status of the girl is unknown the they would suggest pep.

I need to go back in the next hour as time is running out to take a decision. Do you still suggest no pep ?

I am balancing on not taking it, but just read a recent post on the I am infected board were a guy claims to have been infected through one off sex with a csw. Has kind of spooked me to say the least.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #15 on: September 13, 2011, 01:58:19 AM »
I certainly suggest no PEP. And I also suggest you take claims made on an anonymous internet forum with a huge grain of salt.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #16 on: September 13, 2011, 02:09:47 AM »
JKINATL2,

Thanks for your prompt repsonse. Sorry to bring up other posts.

Its so difficult for non experts like myself getting my head around were the non risk of frottage ends and the risk of penetration begins.

Sorry to be graphic, but there was contact between the head of my penis and the vagina and that is a i guess the concept i am struggling with. I understand thii is classed as frottage, even if pressure was applied. Is that correct.


Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #17 on: September 13, 2011, 02:24:06 AM »
That is correct. No documented cases EVER from frottage. As a matter of fact, no truly documented sexually transmitted cases from anything except unprotected anal and vaginal sex.

Absolutely no risk. We would never err on the side of putting people in danger.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #18 on: September 13, 2011, 02:40:26 AM »
No, i know you wouldnt. Ok i need to return to the doctors and decline the pep. Thank you.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #19 on: September 13, 2011, 07:03:48 AM »
Single,

I'm a positive woman and I have engaged in frottage with negative men quite a few times - and not one of them ever became infected. Of course we used condoms for intercourse, but not frottage. I would never dream of passing my virus on to anyone and I am very confident that frottage is NO RISK.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline singleguy

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #20 on: September 13, 2011, 07:42:20 AM »
Thanks Ann.

Just to give you some feedback. When i arrived back at the doctors this afternoon, i went in to see the main practice doctor (who wasnt there this morning) and explained the situation again. His reply was clear that pep was not recommended and basically gave the same opinions as yourself. It was completely different from the approach a different doctor took this morning.

Anyway. Time is run out. So i just hope that my recollection of events was correct. The mind is such a powerful thing unfortunately.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unsure what to do.
« Reply #21 on: September 13, 2011, 07:52:25 AM »
Like Ann and JK I see your latest concern as a non-risk.

However, given the level of your concern, you may well want to get tested just for your peace of mind. The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after an exposure. So a negative at 6 weeks is a very good indication that you will continue to test negative at 13 weeks/3 months.

In the meantime if you are planning to get tested, you need to turn your attentions to other matters in your life. It will make the waiting time pass more quickly than you may imagine is possible. And do yourself a big favor and stop surfing the net where you will only find more fuel to feed your worst fears and all to no good purpose.

I expect you to come out of this ok.
Andy Velez

 


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