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Author Topic: just a story  (Read 1022 times)

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Offline mikeyb39

  • Member
  • Posts: 922
just a story
« on: July 04, 2011, 09:04:37 PM »
I think I am the only one in the states that has to work today, least it feels that way, but thankfully I get to work from home.

Anyways, I was just thinking about someone that I have a huge crush on, Imagine that 40 yrs old and having a crush...lol.  I workout close to my home and always stop at the local Vitamin shoppe to get my daily energy drink before the gym.  The guy that works there is the cutest, friendliest guy, he goes out of his way to come over to talk, asks me how my day is going, what i have going on for the weekend etc really obviously firts with me alot.  I find myself going in even when I really don't need to.

The problem is that eventhough i'd love to ask this person out for a beer or something, I always in the back of mind know that it would never work.  Becoming positive sort of closes those scenerios, who would want to date someone that is positive. its easy to put your status out there when you are on an online chat, but having to explain that to someone after the fact seems very difficult.

These are some of things you don't think about before becoming positive, how much your life forever changes.  Once things that seemed so simple like asking someone out on a date becomes a living nighmare in lots of ways.  you sometimes don't feel like a part of society anymore.

This is just a story, no need for response I just felt like typing my thoughts.
11/02/2010  cd4-251, vl-591000
12/09/2010  started Atripla
02/18/2011  cd4-425, vl-800
06/10/2011  cd4-447, vl-70
10/10/2011  cd4-666, vl-80
01/05/2012  swiched med (prezista,norvir ,isentress, )
02/10/2012  cd4-733, vl-UD  Viread removed
06/10/2012  cd4-614, vl-UD
12/14/2012  cd4-764, vl-UD
09/01/2013  cd4-785, vl-UD
03/06/2014. cd4- 1078, VL-UD

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • Posts: 23,904
  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: just a story
« Reply #1 on: July 04, 2011, 09:34:52 PM »
its easy to put your status out there when you are on an online chat, but having to explain that to someone after the fact seems very difficult.

You do realize that there was HIV before manhunt came into existence, right? What the hell do you think we all did?


This is just a story, no need for response I just felt like typing my thoughts.

edit: oops, my bad -- just read that part. Never mind.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline LM

  • Member
  • Posts: 409
Re: just a story
« Reply #2 on: July 04, 2011, 09:51:32 PM »
I know what you mean, and it's easy to say, but... give it a try, give him the opportunity to get to know you before disclosing. Maybe you'll get a good response, you never know.

Offline Basquo

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,251
Re: just a story
« Reply #3 on: July 04, 2011, 10:48:39 PM »
Mikey I know you said no need for responses but I just wanted to say it never hurts to put yourself out there and go for it anyway...I had a crush on my partner for a decade before we got together, and I never made a definitive move on him because he had said something about poz people that I took out of context back then. When we were finally single at the same time and our paths crossed again, I laid it all out on the table and I'm happy to say he licked it up! We've been together for 3.5 years now and he's negative.

If you weren't poz and you asked him out and he shot you down, would you stop going to the vitamin shop? Yes or No, it has nothing to do with being poz or not. He might be poz, too, right? But you'll never know unless you ask him...out!

Offline mikeyb39

  • Member
  • Posts: 922
Re: just a story
« Reply #4 on: July 04, 2011, 11:38:13 PM »
Thanks all, yeah Basquo that is true, didn't think about it that way.  ya never know.
11/02/2010  cd4-251, vl-591000
12/09/2010  started Atripla
02/18/2011  cd4-425, vl-800
06/10/2011  cd4-447, vl-70
10/10/2011  cd4-666, vl-80
01/05/2012  swiched med (prezista,norvir ,isentress, )
02/10/2012  cd4-733, vl-UD  Viread removed
06/10/2012  cd4-614, vl-UD
12/14/2012  cd4-764, vl-UD
09/01/2013  cd4-785, vl-UD
03/06/2014. cd4- 1078, VL-UD

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: just a story
« Reply #5 on: July 05, 2011, 11:11:23 AM »
Mikey, for all you know he may be poz too. I don't see any harm in asking him out for a few drinks or coffee - it may not end in romance but you may gain a great friend. You never know, it could also end in romance. Not all negative people are freaked out by hiv and I know this first-hand.

Find out when his shift ends, time your workout to end just before that time and stop in for an energy drink on your way home and say - hey, I could really go for a beer about now. How about you?
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline sorryass

  • Member
  • Posts: 77
Re: just a story
« Reply #6 on: July 07, 2011, 01:02:25 PM »
Mikeyb39

You have alot going for you.  You work out, take your vitamins, and are a good looking fellow.  Being + is not the end of life!  In many ways, it is a begining.  It brings people togeather, to talk openly about the issue of sexually transmitted diseases.  You should ask your friend out on a date, for dinner.  Casualy bring up the subject of STD(s).  Bring up hiv, feel him out, see how he feels about it.  If you click, your in luck, congratulations!

Mikeyb39
As hiv+ men, we are no different than hiv- men.  We NEED to be loved, touched, hugged, held, slept with.  Human touch is essential for personal growth.  Someone to rub our shoulders, run a bath,  clean between our toes!   Make some toast and tea in the morning.

There are many clubs that organize meeting for positive men to meet each other.  Perhaps that could work for you if cutie in the vitamin store dosen't work out.  Don't stop trying to meet a partner.  Safe sex is just that, SAFE sex.   I say go for it.

Bertram xo
Once a gardener,...............er!

*Ritonavir 100mg 2-Day
*Etravirine 100mg 2-Day
*Raltegravir 400mg 2-Day
*Prezista 600mg 2-Day

 


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